bros2

[Edited by bros2 - 7/3/2003 11:29:19 AM]

BoxerFlat4

Don't forget :-

1. "Do I need to use Octane Booster, and which one is the best ?" (shortly followed by a cyber-fist fight between SDB and dingy)

and one of those questions that should NEVER be asked :-

"Is this fuel surge ?"

Brendan Hughes

Warning - this is a sign that webbie's hair is fully let down, it's obscuring the guidance system, we could be out of control any second now, clear the area, Clear The Area....

Another for you:

- Neither the owner nor the moderators of this board take any responsibility for the mental health of anyone who gets into an argument with co55ie.

And

- Whoever has a thread moved or deleted is entitled to rant and rave about freedom of speech, human rights, ***** and Stalinist dictatorships, the US Constitution, control freakism etc etc until the other members get sick of him, tell him he's a prat and then (worst of all) finally ignore him.

[Edited by Brendan Hughes - 3/26/2003 2:14:15 PM]

ex-webby

LOL!

Why do I love this so much? All that pent up frustration.. this is better than councelling!

- Whenever magazines say the Impreza is the best car in the world, they have finally seen the light.
- Whenever magazines say as much as "Car X might possibly, maybe be a tiny bit better at Y than the Impreza" they have clearly lost the plot and must be flamed

NotoriousREV

POC must change his car every 4 minutes

Extra gauges or other engine monitoring devices are either mandatory or completely useless

Technical threads involving obscure symtoms on a lightly modded engine will be ignored, whereas a thread discussing the boost profile of a home-made TD05/Rolls-Royce/Pratt and Whitney under-leg entry hybrid turbo will last for 19 pages and include detailed graphs and diagrams.

bros2

[Edited by bros2 - 7/3/2003 11:29:36 AM]

Dizzy

* Hurl abuse at all the members and once everyone realises what a complete prat you are change your user name as noone will ever guess.

* Claim that the police have nothing better to do than stop law abiding speeders and people with 5mm high number plates

* Claim everyone here are Tree huggin hippies or ****'s there is NO middle ground

* Never spend 5 seconds checking whether there is already a thread about a specific topic just post another! You can never get enough!

* Post everything in general, Mods have nothing better to do than move your threads to the correct place.


PMSL @ this thread

[Edited by Dizzy - 3/26/2003 3:08:12 PM]

MATTeL

- Someone will innocently ask about turning off e-mail notification and then suddenly find people they have never heard of posting massive amounts of junk on the thread while the e-mail inbox starts bursting at the seams (especially funny if you are organising a big meet in Nottingham).

- If you have a new shape (01/02) it is fugly, no question.
- If you have a pre-01 shape it is old and dated, no question.
- If you have a green 01 then expect to see lots of pictures of the car with guns mounted on it and have it referred to as the "tank" all the time.
- If your car gets referred to as the "tank" expect people to assume you have a military fixation.
- After making a silly/ill-advised comment expect every thread you contribute on to have an immediate reminder posted. *cough* fuel surge *cough*


[Edited by MATTeL - 3/26/2003 3:41:16 PM]

David Lock

Oi Bros2....

"Do P1’s have those ball-bearing Broquet thingies in the fuel tank?

*If I have a Broquet fitted, can I run the car on ear wax and still not get knock."

New rules say be nice to David Lock for a change

Answer Yes
Answer Probably not but I will check it out.

IIRC they used mothballs in the war as an octane booster so you may be closer than you think

Sorry webbie - is this advertising

MATTeL

Read this thread and make a note of the comments about the posts (so you actually have to read the thread) and then look at this thread.

ice man

Must post in the Was It You section a flaming of a non scooby driver telling him/her what a tit they were for trying to race or race you. Cos you know that all non scooby drivers check scoobynet to see if they have been spotted for doing something daft

scooby_si

Any post in the ICE forum must be replied to by chiark
Si (OK i'm gettin desperate kuz u buggers have nicked all decent material)

Re-Bitten Hero

LOL at this thread

If we filled in the answers to all of these questions (which I could do most of myself ) then it would indeed become the Scoobynet FAQ!!

A few more:

* All threads that start as sensible, and have one reply from a muppet, will be immediately moved to the Muppet Forum on principle (MATTeL)
* Any comparison between cars will always end up with "At the end of the day, it comes down to the driver. A well-driven *(fill in as appropriate) will beat an averagely-driven Scoob, particularly if the driver is willing to take risks" upon which point everyone will get bored of replying
* Anyone with "375" or "beast" in their name shall be flamed on sight, for ever
* Anyone who dishes it out, must expect to get it back... (mentioning no names )
* Anyone who disses on Scoobynet as not being technical enough shall be directed to www.22b.com as being the "purist's" modding site
* At least once per week, there shall be a post containing "Is there a *net" where *=(BMW, MX-5, Evo, etc)
* Nobody shall be allowed to reply in Technical forums unless they have at least one mod that they designed

Just keepin' it goin'

Richard

[Edited by Re-Bitten Hero - 3/26/2003 5:29:16 PM]

Re-Bitten Hero

Oh and another couple:

* Anyone wanting to show off their clean car shall take a long-exposure picture of it in a dodgy car park oop North
* Requests for comparisons with the German Dark Side (B*W) shall be referred to Aaron Bird
* Posts that are wind-ups of serious threads from Webbie will generate more replies than the serious one

Richard

[Edited by Re-Bitten Hero - 3/26/2003 5:56:08 PM]

ex-webby

I think we need to save this and have a link to it next to the FAQ

- Whenever saying anything REALLY nasty and spiteful to somebody, always remember to put a at the end so you can say "Didn't you see the ???????" when you get attacked for it.
- Whenever the webmaster answers a suspension or tyre related question, he must always include the words "it's an incredibly complex subject" just to show off.
- During a technical discussion, and at the point that there is overwhelming evidence against you, you are permitted to say "well, we'll agree to differ then" which makes you right again.

Brendan Hughes

...he should be told to p*ss off and buy a banner ad

scooby_si

oww 2 r!t3 pr0p4 0/\/ 5c008yn3t
OH & those with sumin really important 2 get across must use the fine art of OTT smilies instead of long words lol
Si

Miles

Oh, you've missed one (possibly the oldest chestnet):
"If I reset the ECU will my Scoob be faster"

If there's any mention of Audi TT, Honda S2000s, etc, someone replies with some witty gag about bottles of shampoo and conditioner rolling around the boot.

scooby_si

"what tyre pressure do u run" another de ja vous type thread
Si

robski

Any technical question what so ever to be automatically diverted to David Wallis mobile phone

ah sod it, ANY questions what so ever to be diverted to David Wallis, but only when hes busy

What ever car Jonathan aka Chins owns to be the best car ever bar none, until hes test driven another which hes just put a deposit down on

Any mention of sunil to automatically have a picture inserted within 0.000000000001 nanoseconds

Whats is bumpsteer mod to be automatically setup as a new posting in general ever 10 seconds

Any thread with "mods please leave in general" to be moved to the hidden mods only area

robski

ianfergus0n

FAO threads should be viewed by everyone not just the person it is aimed at YOU may be able to help!

Scoty

Forget about search, it's usless now that it works

Dont bother with using smilies or message icon's anymore, they are realy just different coloured shapes to make your screen look better when you are typing a message

Always slate someone to the death if they are wrong, do not give in, ever

Once an hour a member will post a thread in Drivetrain titled " Induction Kit". Leave it an hour before you post the next one



[Edited by Scoty - 3/26/2003 11:58:55 PM]

Dizzy

* If a topic is longer than 1 page just read the topic title and then skip to last page and post your reply ignoring all previous replies

Boost II

iTrader: (1)

...and if you are proved wrong, just go quiet for a few days until the thread has dropped away, never ever admit it.

Hoppy

- Bikes are faster than cars. FACT. Except in the real world or through the twisties.

MATTeL

Someone will always blame you for their thread going slightly off topic and then being moved to another forum.

Give me 10 examples of me making this happen to your threads, when you do I duess we will have to agree to disagree ((read the thread) about it being my fault!

Brendan Hughes

...but if you DO post on it offering to help, you may be told to mind your own business...

Fluffer

-

[Edited by Fluffer - 3/28/2003 11:58:47 AM]

Boost II

iTrader: (1)

Post a really controversial new topic and when everyone is flaming you just give rational and polite replies. Then go back and edit the initial post 5 times and new-comers to the thread will think everyone is picking on you and will start flaming the other posters on your behalf

johnfelstead

The BBS software does not have any bugs, it has "features"