A question for those of you who have had a pregnant wife/partner
08 April 2005, 02:54 PM
#31
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MOK79, what a lucky mare your other half is!! One of natures childbearer's I guess! 
I will pass on what you said about what to do when the baby is born He is a soppy git like that sometimes 
Cheers!!
Hmmm Tracey, yours and everyone's comments are making me think he is telling the truth. Although I am going to have to have a serious chat about that fetish thing
I will pass on what you said about what to do when the baby is born He is a soppy git like that sometimes Cheers!!Hmmm Tracey, yours and everyone's comments are making me think he is telling the truth. Although I am going to have to have a serious chat about that fetish thing
08 April 2005, 02:55 PM
#32
eClaire - sure sounds like it....Grin and bear it, is my advice.
FWIW my other half used a TENS machine and some gas and air and that was it. First baby was a pretty standard 7lbs 8oz and took 6 hrs labour with the "real" labour stage i.e. second stage taking about 30 minutes. Second one was a 10lber:eeek: but he arrived in 18 minutes flat at home on the bed - we were all asleep 2 hours later - amazing.
FWIW my other half used a TENS machine and some gas and air and that was it. First baby was a pretty standard 7lbs 8oz and took 6 hrs labour with the "real" labour stage i.e. second stage taking about 30 minutes. Second one was a 10lber:eeek: but he arrived in 18 minutes flat at home on the bed - we were all asleep 2 hours later - amazing.
08 April 2005, 02:57 PM
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Originally Posted by MikeTheStrike
its a weird time emotionally for you both right now, it will show up in all sorts of ways. I panicked my life was over and bought my scooby.
Enjoy this time together while you can. once your baby arrives you wont have any attention for yourselves. What suprised me most about it all was how much you change your lifestyle without even noticing.
Were 13 months into the rollercoaster ride of parenthood and its awesome, terrifying and wonderful.
warmest of wishes
snoop doggy style - is that with flamboyant hats and long coats?
Enjoy this time together while you can. once your baby arrives you wont have any attention for yourselves. What suprised me most about it all was how much you change your lifestyle without even noticing.
Were 13 months into the rollercoaster ride of parenthood and its awesome, terrifying and wonderful.
warmest of wishes
snoop doggy style - is that with flamboyant hats and long coats?
My lifestyle has changed loads already. I'm quite sad now
08 April 2005, 02:58 PM
#34
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Top Tips
1) join the NCT, it didnt seem too helpful before, but as a support group of fellow novice parents after its priceless. just to know your doing Ok, not great and not bad, just Ok is a huge help.
2) you must do 'skin to skin' when they're born. my wife had to have a C-section and I did the skin to skin, it was very emotional and too impossibly good to describe properly.
1) join the NCT, it didnt seem too helpful before, but as a support group of fellow novice parents after its priceless. just to know your doing Ok, not great and not bad, just Ok is a huge help.
2) you must do 'skin to skin' when they're born. my wife had to have a C-section and I did the skin to skin, it was very emotional and too impossibly good to describe properly.
08 April 2005, 03:00 PM
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Originally Posted by Fat Boy
eClaire - sure sounds like it....Grin and bear it, is my advice.
FWIW my other half used a TENS machine and some gas and air and that was it. First baby was a pretty standard 7lbs 8oz and took 6 hrs labour with the "real" labour stage i.e. second stage taking about 30 minutes. Second one was a 10lber:eeek: but he arrived in 18 minutes flat at home on the bed - we were all asleep 2 hours later - amazing.
FWIW my other half used a TENS machine and some gas and air and that was it. First baby was a pretty standard 7lbs 8oz and took 6 hrs labour with the "real" labour stage i.e. second stage taking about 30 minutes. Second one was a 10lber:eeek: but he arrived in 18 minutes flat at home on the bed - we were all asleep 2 hours later - amazing.
Those of you who have done the home birth thing, do you recommend it? If so would you have done it with your first?
08 April 2005, 03:08 PM
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Originally Posted by MikeTheStrike
Top Tips
1) join the NCT, it didnt seem too helpful before, but as a support group of fellow novice parents after its priceless. just to know your doing Ok, not great and not bad, just Ok is a huge help.
2) you must do 'skin to skin' when they're born. my wife had to have a C-section and I did the skin to skin, it was very emotional and too impossibly good to describe properly.
1) join the NCT, it didnt seem too helpful before, but as a support group of fellow novice parents after its priceless. just to know your doing Ok, not great and not bad, just Ok is a huge help.
2) you must do 'skin to skin' when they're born. my wife had to have a C-section and I did the skin to skin, it was very emotional and too impossibly good to describe properly.
It is a lot of help, as is the 'Ready, Steady, Baby' book I got from the midwife which is compiled by the NHS. A lot of useful information on both counts! But the NCT and medical professionals seem to disagree about certain things, I reckon I am still going to join and make up my own mind! Definitely doing skin to skin, I couldn't not! Best way to bond with your baby
08 April 2005, 03:14 PM
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Originally Posted by MikeTheStrike
One good thing with your hormones now is if you are feeling sad, is you'll be happy in a minute.
Dont be sad, its seriously cool
Dont be sad, its seriously cool
You're right too. I do feel sad/worried sometimes about little things (not angry or mardy or wanting to scratch his eyes out before anyone starts 
) but I can quite easily brush it aside now, I don't get angry anymore like a did before - it's strange Sometimes though, I hate being pregnant, other times I think it's alright. I can't really make my mind up! Great excuse for have baths though - 2 warm baths a day with drops Bio-oil and after each of those I get Bio-oil massages to prevent stretch marks
it's not all bad
08 April 2005, 03:17 PM
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Originally Posted by scoobygurllover
argh this is making me broody lol, and there aint a hope in a hell of that happening for me just now!!!!
Just kidding! This was a little accident, I was a good time girl before; it has calmed me down no end so is probably for the best
08 April 2005, 03:17 PM
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Hi Claire - afraid your other half is just normal! We've petered off that side of things a little at the moment as I'm over 8 months gone and feeling a little uncomfy to say the least! Just got a few more weeks of work and then about 3 weeks before the baby is due.
My other half loves the fact that I'm pregnant with his child. He's very protective of me and bump and is chuffed to bits about being a dad. He's not so happy with the sheer growth of my ***** though as they weren't small before and are stupidly large now!
However, having weighed myself just this morning, I've put on only 4lbs so far. I was horrociously ill for the first 4 months and couldn't keep anything down. I'm now up to kiddie-sized meal portions and managing to keep those, mostly.
Enjoy the new-found attention!
We've petered off that side of things a little at the moment as I'm over 8 months gone and feeling a little uncomfy to say the least! Just got a few more weeks of work and then about 3 weeks before the baby is due.My other half loves the fact that I'm pregnant with his child. He's very protective of me and bump and is chuffed to bits about being a dad. He's not so happy with the sheer growth of my ***** though as they weren't small before and are stupidly large now!
However, having weighed myself just this morning, I've put on only 4lbs so far. I was horrociously ill for the first 4 months and couldn't keep anything down. I'm now up to kiddie-sized meal portions and managing to keep those, mostly.
Enjoy the new-found attention!
08 April 2005, 03:23 PM
#42
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In my experience the 2 '1st time home birthers' in our AN group were both rushed into hospital last minute. Also happened to one of our friends too.
IMO the hospital is a good place to be if complications arise, but I can see the homers POV too
IMO the hospital is a good place to be if complications arise, but I can see the homers POV too
08 April 2005, 03:30 PM
#44
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i dont think, even if it was an accident, id get to keep it. My boyfriend is definatly of the opinion of not till he into his mid/late 30s. Im only 19 he has jus turned 26, so i know not right now. But i always wanted to be a young mum and be able to enjoy being able to do things. At the end of the day his job comes first in his life and i understand that. Just hard when all you really want from life is to be a mum, thats all i ever wanted. I even work in a childrens ward at the hospital.Hard to explain when one wants and one doesnt.
08 April 2005, 03:31 PM
#45
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LMAO @ your stupidly large breasts!!
I do kiddy portions now; but I am a bit hungrier today for some reason which is odd! Can't believe you are still being sick though I just stopped being sick one day and that was it! Although, he has passed wind a few times and it made me ill (he found it hilarious!) and once to the point where I nearly didn't make it to the pan on time
As for the *****, I think I have gone to a D cup (was a C before hand) but I am going to Debenhams to get measured next week LOL. Oh the joys!
I look forward to seeing the pictures of the little one when he comes along
I am about to send you PM btw
I do kiddy portions now; but I am a bit hungrier today for some reason which is odd! Can't believe you are still being sick though
I just stopped being sick one day and that was it! Although, he has passed wind a few times and it made me ill (he found it hilarious!) and once to the point where I nearly didn't make it to the pan on time As for the *****, I think I have gone to a D cup (was a C before hand) but I am going to Debenhams to get measured next week
LOL. Oh the joys!I look forward to seeing the pictures of the little one when he comes along
I am about to send you PM btw
08 April 2005, 03:36 PM
#46
I wouldn't do the home birth thing first time around unless you are close to the hospital - but if that goes well, then , and should you have another, the home birth was pretty special.
I have to admit that I was pretty unsure about it being a typical bloke as you are effectively tied to gas and air only at home/ epidurals etc in hospital, but my other half was all for it and she was right. Our little girl slept through the whole thing, came running into our room in the morning to be confronted by the Moses basket with her new brother/potential competitor in it, stopped for just a heartbeat and then said "Baba!" and hugged him. We were pretty emotional at that point anyway and that just about finished us off
NCT can seem a little tree huggery ( "All medics are evil, they will strap you to the bed and force you to have pain relief - that's not natural, etc") but, as said above, it's the support group you meet in terms of other local first time mums that will be on maternity leave at the same time as you that makes it worthwhile afterwards, plus just simple things like how the hell do you get a nappy on and when to feed etc. We did a two day intensive course and had quite a laugh with the other parents to be. We also went to the local hospital one and whilst trying not to sound like a snob or something there weren't many people there that we would have wanted to hang out with afterwards and the information was pretty much the same, bar the labour ward tour....
I have to admit that I was pretty unsure about it being a typical bloke as you are effectively tied to gas and air only at home/ epidurals etc in hospital, but my other half was all for it and she was right. Our little girl slept through the whole thing, came running into our room in the morning to be confronted by the Moses basket with her new brother/potential competitor in it, stopped for just a heartbeat and then said "Baba!" and hugged him. We were pretty emotional at that point anyway and that just about finished us off
NCT can seem a little tree huggery ( "All medics are evil, they will strap you to the bed and force you to have pain relief - that's not natural, etc") but, as said above, it's the support group you meet in terms of other local first time mums that will be on maternity leave at the same time as you that makes it worthwhile afterwards, plus just simple things like how the hell do you get a nappy on and when to feed etc. We did a two day intensive course and had quite a laugh with the other parents to be. We also went to the local hospital one and whilst trying not to sound like a snob or something there weren't many people there that we would have wanted to hang out with afterwards and the information was pretty much the same, bar the labour ward tour....
08 April 2005, 03:44 PM
#47
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Sometimes though, I hate being pregnant, other times I think it's alright. I can't really make my mind up! Great excuse for have baths though - 2 warm baths a day with drops Bio-oil and after each of those I get Bio-oil massages to prevent stretch marks it's not all bad
Last edited by ChrisB; 08 April 2005 at 03:50 PM.
08 April 2005, 03:47 PM
#48
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Ewwwww, hospital it is then
scoobygurl I am 21 (22 next wednesday ) and am happy to be having a kid at this age; I want to be able to relate to my kids!! If you do fall pregnant, ultimately it is your choice wether or not you want to keep it. I reckon most pregnancies are little accidents anyway, and if he were in the situation he may react diffferently. His career will also be important to him as he will probably be the breadwinner and will want to provide for his wife and child.
He may also want to get married first and beable to afford to whisk you off to a hot tropical island - something you can't do whilst pregant There will be reasons behind it for both his benefit and yours
scoobygurl
I am 21 (22 next wednesday ) and am happy to be having a kid at this age; I want to be able to relate to my kids!! If you do fall pregnant, ultimately it is your choice wether or not you want to keep it. I reckon most pregnancies are little accidents anyway, and if he were in the situation he may react diffferently. His career will also be important to him as he will probably be the breadwinner and will want to provide for his wife and child. He may also want to get married first and beable to afford to whisk you off to a hot tropical island - something you can't do whilst pregant
There will be reasons behind it for both his benefit and yours
08 April 2005, 03:51 PM
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FB, spot on regarding NCT
They really push the breast feeding thing a bit too far IMO, makes mum feel a failure if it doesn't work out
The only good thing about the NHS one was familiarity with the surroundings, all the info is basically the same whether NCT or NHS. The average age is higher at the NCT also most of the group have stayed in touch, which as mentioned earlier is a great help - especially during the early months
They really push the breast feeding thing a bit too far IMO, makes mum feel a failure if it doesn't work out
The only good thing about the NHS one was familiarity with the surroundings, all the info is basically the same whether NCT or NHS. The average age is higher at the NCT also most of the group have stayed in touch, which as mentioned earlier is a great help - especially during the early months
08 April 2005, 03:52 PM
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Totally agree. NCT was a bit happy clappy, but well worth it.
I dont care how many courses you do, I'll happily admit I was absolutely s******g myself when they said we could leave the hospital. I felt like I did'nt remeber a thing about looking after our new born. I hit nearly 20mph going home.
I was quite disturbed going to the labour ward, I know whale sounds are relaxing, but mums birthing is totally different. That kind of makes you edgy. factor in we were at Basildon Hosp and you deffo didnt want to make friends ( closet snob ). I think most thought we were undercover DHSS when we had ours.
I dont care how many courses you do, I'll happily admit I was absolutely s******g myself when they said we could leave the hospital. I felt like I did'nt remeber a thing about looking after our new born. I hit nearly 20mph going home.
I was quite disturbed going to the labour ward, I know whale sounds are relaxing, but mums birthing is totally different. That kind of makes you edgy. factor in we were at Basildon Hosp and you deffo didnt want to make friends ( closet snob ). I think most thought we were undercover DHSS when we had ours.
08 April 2005, 03:54 PM
#52
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Yeh i guess so claire. Im a lot more mature for my age than most 19 yr olds due to my line of work and life experiance. And my only goals in life is to have a family, its what i live for. I know he doesnt want to be married for a long time yet either, and the first mention that my pill might not have worked, he has a panic attack. As he put it, 'its his worst fear.' I know if 'it' happened i would wanna keep it regardless of the circumstances however i feel i would lose him. I know its a lot to think about at 19 and still quite early on in the relationship status but ive played ball with it a few times jus to see his reaction on the entire subject and to say that his reaction is not what i wanted to hear would be a understatement. Doesnt look promising huh
08 April 2005, 04:00 PM
#53
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Originally Posted by eClaire
Ok, something I can't seem to get my head round....
I am showing to the point you can tell I am pregnant by looking at it. But since this has happened the other half has become even more interested in sex. I can understand why while I am changing clothes he asks me to hang back for a moment so he can touch the bump but it's getting to the point that I can't lie in bed and watch the telly without him poking it in my back (even fully covered with my jimjams on!!)
He can't really explain why this attracts him/turns him on, so to speak. I am very curious and would like to understand why he is like this, if I learn the reasons behind it then I might be able to stop getting p155ed at him when I am trying to watch footballers wives
Have any of you experienced this? Can you explain it, please?
I am showing to the point you can tell I am pregnant by looking at it. But since this has happened the other half has become even more interested in sex. I can understand why while I am changing clothes he asks me to hang back for a moment so he can touch the bump but it's getting to the point that I can't lie in bed and watch the telly without him poking it in my back (even fully covered with my jimjams on!!)
He can't really explain why this attracts him/turns him on, so to speak. I am very curious and would like to understand why he is like this, if I learn the reasons behind it then I might be able to stop getting p155ed at him when I am trying to watch footballers wives
Have any of you experienced this? Can you explain it, please?
08 April 2005, 04:13 PM
#54
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My wife still meets with her NCT mob once a week .. and Ellie is 18months now . The 'dads' also get to have an evening out a couple of times a month for beer & curry
It's a fantastic support group. ( Though I agree the classes were a bit 'earth mother' )
Steve
It's a fantastic support group. ( Though I agree the classes were a bit 'earth mother' )
Steve
08 April 2005, 04:20 PM
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PMSL Julz We will have to wait and see wether or not I get like that - I will ressurect this thread and let you all know
Scoobygurl, if it's early on in your relationship see how it goes you never know - he might not be the one for you!! I know it's not exactly a nice thing to hear, but it's life! I didn't want to hear it either, but I am now You will find your man one day, and have LOTS of children How did you get working in a childrens ward? Something I haven't thought about but sounds interesting (I study accountancy - it's boring as hell )
Those of you who joined NCT, how early did you join?
We will have to wait and see wether or not I get like that - I will ressurect this thread and let you all know Scoobygurl, if it's early on in your relationship see how it goes
you never know - he might not be the one for you!! I know it's not exactly a nice thing to hear, but it's life! I didn't want to hear it either, but I am now You will find your man one day, and have LOTS of children How did you get working in a childrens ward? Something I haven't thought about but sounds interesting (I study accountancy - it's boring as hell )Those of you who joined NCT, how early did you join?
08 April 2005, 04:52 PM
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Originally Posted by eClaire
Those of you who joined NCT, how early did you join?
08 April 2005, 04:55 PM
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Originally Posted by stevem2k
course started about 8 weeks before dropping date ( we did 6x evenings + 1 day incl 1/2 day with breastfeeding councillor as I recall ). We were 3 couples short by the last session (!)
08 April 2005, 05:03 PM
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I used to work on a adult surgical ward as a nursing auxiliary but got bored of it, so then went to work in the community with adults and children with learning and physical disabilities. Worked with a wide variety of illnesses and disabilites but didnt really like the vunrability. Decided it wasnt for me and started hunting for a new job, one was advertised on the bulletins for the local NHS hospital so i applied. And hey presto i go it, out of 50 other applicants ive heard, so yay for me. Not the greatest wages in the world but thats care work for you! thanks for ur previous comments and yes u was right, not what i wanted to hear but well i can only give it a go and see how things transpire. Heres hoping cus im loved up to bits!
08 April 2005, 07:05 PM
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Originally Posted by eClaire
Ok, something I can't seem to get my head round....
I am showing to the point you can tell I am pregnant by looking at it. But since this has happened the other half has become even more interested in sex. I can understand why while I am changing clothes he asks me to hang back for a moment so he can touch the bump but it's getting to the point that I can't lie in bed and watch the telly without him poking it in my back (even fully covered with my jimjams on!!)
He can't really explain why this attracts him/turns him on, so to speak. I am very curious and would like to understand why he is like this, if I learn the reasons behind it then I might be able to stop getting p155ed at him when I am trying to watch footballers wives
Have any of you experienced this? Can you explain it, please?
I am showing to the point you can tell I am pregnant by looking at it. But since this has happened the other half has become even more interested in sex. I can understand why while I am changing clothes he asks me to hang back for a moment so he can touch the bump but it's getting to the point that I can't lie in bed and watch the telly without him poking it in my back (even fully covered with my jimjams on!!)
He can't really explain why this attracts him/turns him on, so to speak. I am very curious and would like to understand why he is like this, if I learn the reasons behind it then I might be able to stop getting p155ed at him when I am trying to watch footballers wives
Have any of you experienced this? Can you explain it, please?
Simon