He must really hate her!
09 March 2006, 04:44 PM
#151
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by TheBigMan
My first instinct is there are 2 issues here.
1. The social aspect.
2. The moral aspect.
By this I mean: I have sympathy for a man that is forced to pay towards a child that he did not want. On the other hand a ruling that would mean men no longer contributed would create a massive social issue with regards to benefits, women in employment etc.
Can of worms or what.....
1. The social aspect.
2. The moral aspect.
By this I mean: I have sympathy for a man that is forced to pay towards a child that he did not want. On the other hand a ruling that would mean men no longer contributed would create a massive social issue with regards to benefits, women in employment etc.
Can of worms or what.....
09 March 2006, 05:34 PM
#153
Scooby Regular
Join Date: May 2001
Posts: 4,228
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by TheBigMan
The relationship is over.
It is no better than asking a total stranger to give sperm, then give them every detail of you and your child.
Come to think of it, no it is worse!! If you said no you wouldn't be treated like a nasty bar-steward like this fella is!!
Beginning to feel sorry for this guy big time now. The poor sod, he doesn't want a child and he's being verbally battered for it!!!
Madness.
It is no better than asking a total stranger to give sperm, then give them every detail of you and your child.
Come to think of it, no it is worse!! If you said no you wouldn't be treated like a nasty bar-steward like this fella is!!
Beginning to feel sorry for this guy big time now. The poor sod, he doesn't want a child and he's being verbally battered for it!!!
Madness.
09 March 2006, 05:52 PM
#154
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 770
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by Crapaud62
Aren't you conveniently forgetting that he DID give his consent for the "production" of the embryos. Basically he gave his consent and he has subsequently changed his mind. What did he think he was doing when he originally gave his consent for the embryos? Did he miss the biology lesson that would have explained what an embryo is?
He is no longer with this woman and has no interest in bringing a child into the world with her, so why should he be rail roaded into doing so?. If a bringing a child into the world is the true product of 2 peoples love for each other, why should this be cheapend by allowing this woman to make a prevous lover become a father against his wishes
09 March 2006, 07:25 PM
#155
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,334
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by Crapaud62
Aren't you conveniently forgetting that he DID give his consent for the "production" of the embryos. Basically he gave his consent and he has subsequently changed his mind. What did he think he was doing when he originally gave his consent for the embryos? Did he miss the biology lesson that would have explained what an embryo is?
Soz for that, can't answer properly - in a rush!!
09 March 2006, 07:55 PM
#156
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 9,307
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by davyboy
...and the relevance being..........?
you have no idea what its like to have children so no idea how strong the parental desire to be fully involved in the raising of that child can be.
your illness has no relevance, this is about a dad saying he doesnt want a kid to grow up where he is not really the father....yet he will be.
your suggestion that you would give an ex your sperm so she could have a kid without you is very odd indeed.
09 March 2006, 08:10 PM
#157
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
you have no idea what its like to have children so no idea how strong the parental desire to be fully involved in the raising of that child can be
your suggestion that you would give an ex your sperm so she could have a kid without you is very odd indeed.
09 March 2006, 08:38 PM
#159
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Mar 1999
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 25,080
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Maybe davyboy is winding us up, but I get a feeling he is serious.
I can possibly see how this could be seen as "being kind" to the woman in question, but even still, iti s a little odd.
Given today's messed up society, I'd want something in place to prevent the child from ever finding out who I am, simply as it'd not surpise me that if in 20 years time, I find I'm being sued by some stranger who is my biological son, for mental anguish and suffering caused by the father not being there for them.
I can possibly see how this could be seen as "being kind" to the woman in question, but even still, iti s a little odd.
Given today's messed up society, I'd want something in place to prevent the child from ever finding out who I am, simply as it'd not surpise me that if in 20 years time, I find I'm being sued by some stranger who is my biological son, for mental anguish and suffering caused by the father not being there for them.
09 March 2006, 08:38 PM
#160
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 407
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
"So you would be fully prepared to have a child that is biologically yours and not have anything to do with it"
Chavs do it all the time!
Chavs do it all the time!
Last edited by Bram; 09 March 2006 at 08:47 PM.
09 March 2006, 08:42 PM
#161
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by **************
So you would be fully prepared to have a child that is biologically yours and not have anything to do with it? Can't understand blokes like that 
I'd bet some couples are even reading this thread.
09 March 2006, 09:55 PM
#162
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by Crapaud62
Aren't you conveniently forgetting that he DID give his consent for the "production" of the embryos. Basically he gave his consent and he has subsequently changed his mind. What did he think he was doing when he originally gave his consent for the embryos? Did he miss the biology lesson that would have explained what an embryo is?
09 March 2006, 09:58 PM
#163
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by davyboy
Lots of couples need help from a donor who will have nothing to do with the upbringing of a child.
I'd bet some couples are even reading this thread.
I'd bet some couples are even reading this thread.
09 March 2006, 10:11 PM
#164
Scooby Regular
But to repeat it for a third time, a donor would never know anything about whether a child was even made from the donated sperm, let alone where the child was.
10 March 2006, 07:58 AM
#166
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by Dream Weaver
But to repeat it for a third time, a donor would never know anything about whether a child was even made from the donated sperm, let alone where the child was.
I am just saying, if I was in the same situation, and unless I thought she'd be an unfit parent, I'd be willing to let her continue providing that the father would be unknown on the birth certficate and the CSA would not come after me.
You think different, lets move on. I'm not going to change my mind, your not going to change yours.
10 March 2006, 08:07 AM
#167
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by davyboy
I know this.
I am just saying, if I was in the same situation, and unless I thought she'd be an unfit parent, I'd be willing to let her continue providing that the father would be unknown on the birth certficate and the CSA would not come after me.
You think different, lets move on. I'm not going to change my mind, your not going to change yours.
I am just saying, if I was in the same situation, and unless I thought she'd be an unfit parent, I'd be willing to let her continue providing that the father would be unknown on the birth certficate and the CSA would not come after me.
You think different, lets move on. I'm not going to change my mind, your not going to change yours.
So on the basis that you wouldn't be anonymous and the CSA would be coming after, you're saying you'd do exactly the same thing as he has?
10 March 2006, 08:13 AM
#168
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
The CSA would only come after you if she asked them to help....but I agree, he'll never be anonymous now.
Even then, I'd still give the woman her only chance to have her biological child......just as long as it never cost me.
Even then, I'd still give the woman her only chance to have her biological child......just as long as it never cost me.
10 March 2006, 08:14 AM
#169
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: A big town with sh1t shops: Northampton
Posts: 21,366
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Hang on a minute, can I clarify the CSA situation? Has anyone found out if he would be chased if she said she didn't know who the father is and put unknown on the birth certificate?
I know it's a high profile case, but unless they have the right to ask for blood samples, if she denied the child was his, what can they do? I mean within the law.
I know it's a high profile case, but unless they have the right to ask for blood samples, if she denied the child was his, what can they do? I mean within the law.
10 March 2006, 08:54 AM
#173
Guest
Posts: n/a
Originally Posted by davyboy
The CSA would only come after you if she asked them to help....but I agree, he'll never be anonymous now.
Even then, I'd still give the woman her only chance to have her biological child......just as long as it never cost me.
Even then, I'd still give the woman her only chance to have her biological child......just as long as it never cost me.
I don't think until you were in that situation you could say you would categorically have nothing to do with it. Would it not play on your mind to find out how YOUR child was, that it was living safely, was healthy and being brought up in a safe environment? How would you feel if you saw them out shooping one day and the child happened to look you in the eyes? Could you really have no feelings for it at all? What if when the child became old enough they came looking for you? Would you turn them away? After all the child would be YOUR flesh and blood.
I think it takes a cold hearted bloke to say he would happily have a child and have nothing to do with it.
10 March 2006, 08:55 AM
#174
Scooby Senior
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Scotchland
Posts: 6,566
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by OllyK
Just because a woman consents to a man feeling her **** doesn't means she has therefore consented to all other sexual activity in perpetuity.
At the end of the day we don't know the full facts. This woman could have just been after the guys sperm as far as we know.
It's his decision and he's made it.
10 March 2006, 08:57 AM
#175
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by **************
I just find it astonishing a bloke can willingly father a child and then walk away and have nothing to do with it. I just can not understand this mentality. I know it happens lots but I will never understand any bloke who can do it
10 March 2006, 09:03 AM
#176
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by davyboy
The CSA would only come after you if she asked them to help....but I agree, he'll never be anonymous now.
Even then, I'd still give the woman her only chance to have her biological child......just as long as it never cost me.
Even then, I'd still give the woman her only chance to have her biological child......just as long as it never cost me.
So I'll ask again, in the EXACT same position this guys is in, where you could at a later date become financially responsible - would you still consent?
10 March 2006, 09:04 AM
#177
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by Clarebabes
Hang on a minute, can I clarify the CSA situation? Has anyone found out if he would be chased if she said she didn't know who the father is and put unknown on the birth certificate?
I know it's a high profile case, but unless they have the right to ask for blood samples, if she denied the child was his, what can they do? I mean within the law.
I know it's a high profile case, but unless they have the right to ask for blood samples, if she denied the child was his, what can they do? I mean within the law.
Last edited by OllyK; 10 March 2006 at 09:07 AM.
10 March 2006, 09:06 AM
#178
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 12,304
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by davyboy
All his done is **** in to a jar!
10 March 2006, 09:09 AM
#179
Scooby Senior
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Next door to the WiFi connection
Posts: 16,293
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by davyboy
I know this.
I am just saying, if I was in the same situation, and unless I thought she'd be an unfit parent, I'd be willing to let her continue providing that the father would be unknown on the birth certficate and the CSA would not come after me.
I am just saying, if I was in the same situation, and unless I thought she'd be an unfit parent, I'd be willing to let her continue providing that the father would be unknown on the birth certficate and the CSA would not come after me.
10 March 2006, 09:10 AM
#180
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by Tiggs
and would you be happy for them to be raised without your input?
But if my total input was a donation some time ago then, i'd be happy for someone else to benefit from my sperm