naughty step question
29 September 2006, 12:15 AM
#31
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Originally Posted by Bubba po
Philip Larkin - This Be The Verse
They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.
They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.
29 September 2006, 12:26 AM
#32
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Originally Posted by Suresh
I think you misunderstand. Information sources and discussion forums are now available like never before. If you would honestly shun all such resources, shut yourself away and totally go it alone if you were raising kids today then good luck to you. 
I posted primarily because I appreciated the irony of him being naughty on the naughty step and thought I'd share it. The rest of the time the only problem with him is his womanising!
With his little Swiss miss
Steve - It was my first attempt with the naughty step technique. I got him to get on with the end of day routine by himself but he didn't apologise as such.. I'll try that next time!
I posted primarily because I appreciated the irony of him being naughty on the naughty step and thought I'd share it. The rest of the time the only problem with him is his womanising!
With his little Swiss miss
Steve - It was my first attempt with the naughty step technique. I got him to get on with the end of day routine by himself but he didn't apologise as such.. I'll try that next time!
IMHO
29 September 2006, 01:48 PM
#35
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I don't use naughty step for our terrors, if I was faced with the situation you described they would just get put into pyjamas and straight to bed.
Not sure about naughty step, my wife has used it once or twice for our 5 year old but I think the punishment is shame, something that a 2 year old doesn't "get" (read understand). Our 2 year old gets put in her room, till she stops crying (which she will do when put in there), this can be 5 minutes or longer until she is allowed out.
The threat of being sent to her room is normally enough now.
Not sure about naughty step, my wife has used it once or twice for our 5 year old but I think the punishment is shame, something that a 2 year old doesn't "get" (read understand). Our 2 year old gets put in her room, till she stops crying (which she will do when put in there), this can be 5 minutes or longer until she is allowed out.
The threat of being sent to her room is normally enough now.
Last edited by MattW; 29 September 2006 at 01:50 PM.
29 September 2006, 02:06 PM
#37
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Originally Posted by 84of300
Ignore him. 
He'll soon get fed up
He'll soon get fed up
The old distraction method also works. 'Hey, look at that bird in the garden ,, ' etc etc
Haven't tried the naughty step yet. At 2 ours is on the move from the minute he wakes to the minute he goes to bed. he would not stay on a NS ...
Dave
Last edited by hutton_d; 29 September 2006 at 07:14 PM.
29 September 2006, 02:35 PM
#38
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Have to say that the naughty step works in the majority of cases here
It isnt punishment as such, it is a timeout for the kids to reflect on what they have done wrong,
Sometimes they try and 'play' when on the stairs, and as such further time is added until they stop and sit quiet, and are ready to apologise
I know it doesnt work for everyone, but the kids do hate having to go on the stairs, they see it as a form of punishment as it stops them doing the stuff they enjoy
further outbursts are usually followed by denial of privelleges like going to after school activities, or staying on the stairs till bedtime, or an early bedtime if they have already eaten
These steps (no pun intended) generally work with us, and havent come up with a better way of dealing with the kids when they do wrong
BTW I have never seen Super Nanny
Oh and for those who disbelieve this method, doing timeout and being put on a wrist strap, when out shopping is fun, and works too, as there is the added embarrament factor so tantrums/playing up etc dont last too long when out in the public
It isnt punishment as such, it is a timeout for the kids to reflect on what they have done wrong,
Sometimes they try and 'play' when on the stairs, and as such further time is added until they stop and sit quiet, and are ready to apologise
I know it doesnt work for everyone, but the kids do hate having to go on the stairs, they see it as a form of punishment as it stops them doing the stuff they enjoy
further outbursts are usually followed by denial of privelleges like going to after school activities, or staying on the stairs till bedtime, or an early bedtime if they have already eaten
These steps (no pun intended) generally work with us, and havent come up with a better way of dealing with the kids when they do wrong
BTW I have never seen Super Nanny
Oh and for those who disbelieve this method, doing timeout and being put on a wrist strap, when out shopping is fun, and works too, as there is the added embarrament factor so tantrums/playing up etc dont last too long when out in the public
29 September 2006, 06:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Suresh
Dunno. After I've told him to get up and carry on as usual and I then walk away when he doesn't listen - that could re-inforce his idea that ignoring his parents is okay, surely? Then again it would give me time to slip away and put a real-time post for advice here on SN!
He is at the battle of wills stage. It does get better, honest.
Sorry, I meant ignore him when he is starting his antics. He'll soon learn if he acts bad he gets no attention, if he acts good, kisses all round.
29 September 2006, 08:09 PM
#45
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Originally Posted by AudiLover
a nuaghty step? 
Thats the stupidest fookin ****e ive heard in a long time. LOL and only two minutes. Your kids gonna run you in a couple years.
Thats the stupidest fookin ****e ive heard in a long time. LOL and only two minutes. Your kids gonna run you in a couple years.
29 September 2006, 08:53 PM
#47
Originally Posted by Leslie
Life is not a bed of roses. He needs a smart slap on the backside and a further punishment that will affect his thinking if he does not sort himself out.
Les
Les
Then again, he once hit his mum in anger and got a solid slap on the offending hand from his dad and has never done it again!
29 September 2006, 09:02 PM
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Originally Posted by Suresh
Then again, he once hit his mum in anger and got a solid slap on the offending hand from his dad and has never done it again!
As for the naughty step, not sure I agree with that, much better to make them kneel in the corner of the hallway, facing the corner, for at least 30 mins, if not an hour.
29 September 2006, 09:05 PM
#49
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Naughty step works for my 2-year-old girl. We're lucky we have a hall where we can close her in completely... no escape back into the lounge or kitchen. She does biatch about being on the step, but calms down after a few seconds.
Every time she starts to play up, I just tell her she's going on the step. She says, "I don't want to go on the step", so I say behave then, and she does. I'm sure this will change in the future.
I used to get a damn good whack from Dad, or thrown into my room for hours, not to mention slapped legs or being sent to bed with no dinner! How times have changed.
Talking of naughty step... my wife pranged her Fezzy on Wednesday. When I told my little girl she said "Mummy is very naughty, she has to go on the naughty step".
My wife will be going on more than the bl**dy naughty step I can tell you!
J.
Every time she starts to play up, I just tell her she's going on the step. She says, "I don't want to go on the step", so I say behave then, and she does. I'm sure this will change in the future.
I used to get a damn good whack from Dad, or thrown into my room for hours, not to mention slapped legs or being sent to bed with no dinner! How times have changed.
Talking of naughty step... my wife pranged her Fezzy on Wednesday. When I told my little girl she said "Mummy is very naughty, she has to go on the naughty step".
My wife will be going on more than the bl**dy naughty step I can tell you!
J.
29 September 2006, 09:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Chip Sengravy
This 'naughty step' is a load of bollocks . 'Naughty cellar, or garage' coupled with 'naughty leave you in there with the lights off for a hour and all the spiders' would teach the little ****s a thing or two.
. 'Naughty cellar, or garage' coupled with 'naughty leave you in there with the lights off for a hour and all the spiders' would teach the little ****s a thing or two. Oh fond memories of that shed
and if you feckin cry you'll get a fecking slap side the ear if you carry on
29 September 2006, 09:42 PM
#51
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Originally Posted by Suresh
This evening he sat down on the landing and refused to begin his bathtime routine even when given the choice of this or a 'punishment'. I picked him up and carried him to the nearby stairs to the 2nd floor and put him on the first step and told him why I had put him there and he was not to move until I said so.
29 September 2006, 11:01 PM
#52
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Originally Posted by Suresh
If you are not a parent, please press the back button in your browser now and save yourself the trouble of reading this parenting post.
We have a little boy who is entering his 'terrible twos' period bang on time.
Whenever he is asked to do anything that doesn't appeal, he just sits down quietly and refuses to move. Doesn't matter where he is at the time e.g. in the supermarket at the checkout or outside the creche just before getting in to the car. Instructing him to move in a stern voice usually works.
This evening he sat down on the landing and refused to begin his bathtime routine even when given the choice of this or a 'punishment'. I picked him up and carried him to the nearby stairs to the 2nd floor and put him on the first step and told him why I had put him there and he was not to move until I said so. This is the correct 'naughty step' procedure, I believe. After his 2 minutes were up I told him he could stand up and carry on with his bathtime and bedtime routine now. However he just continued sitting there and refused to move. My question is what to do if your child is naughty on the naughty step?
Really glad he's gone for the silent refusal approach rather than screaming tantrums though.
Any experiences of the terrible twos out there that people might want to share?
We have a little boy who is entering his 'terrible twos' period bang on time.
Whenever he is asked to do anything that doesn't appeal, he just sits down quietly and refuses to move. Doesn't matter where he is at the time e.g. in the supermarket at the checkout or outside the creche just before getting in to the car. Instructing him to move in a stern voice usually works.
This evening he sat down on the landing and refused to begin his bathtime routine even when given the choice of this or a 'punishment'. I picked him up and carried him to the nearby stairs to the 2nd floor and put him on the first step and told him why I had put him there and he was not to move until I said so. This is the correct 'naughty step' procedure, I believe. After his 2 minutes were up I told him he could stand up and carry on with his bathtime and bedtime routine now. However he just continued sitting there and refused to move. My question is what to do if your child is naughty on the naughty step?
Really glad he's gone for the silent refusal approach rather than screaming tantrums though.
Any experiences of the terrible twos out there that people might want to share?Terrible twos? No No No No No.
It's the 'Troublesome twos' - enjoy iy it before you get to the Terrible threes
.Then, and only then, it's the phookin fours
Take it easy.andy
30 September 2006, 02:22 AM
#53
Originally Posted by Markus
As for the naughty step, not sure I agree with that, much better to make them kneel in the corner of the hallway, facing the corner, for at least 30 mins, if not an hour.
Originally Posted by Squadron-Leader
Talking of naughty step... my wife pranged her Fezzy on Wednesday. When I told my little girl she said "Mummy is very naughty, she has to go on the naughty step".
My wife will be going on more than the bl**dy naughty step I can tell you!
J.
My wife will be going on more than the bl**dy naughty step I can tell you!
J.
Originally Posted by Dazza01
Stop ******* around and pick the little blitter up and put him in the bath, don't ***** foot around with which step do you want to fooking sit on, Jesus Christ he's 2 not 22
30 September 2006, 08:02 AM
#54
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Sounds like that all too familiar case of boundary-pushing. Bit like a game of poker, seeing who will fold first 
We find (as I'm sure other parents do to) each kid tries to push differently (there's no apparent knowledge forum between them, such as a FAQ, to determine boundaries )
But, this also brings into question who is perceived as the ultimate authority figure in the household.... If your wife had have said it, would he have listened and obeyed?
My wife and I don't use the naughty step, as if my Wife can't get the kids (3 & 6) to "comply", I get involved.
A stern word usually works, but when the 3 yr-old is tired (she's started Nursery a couple of weeks ago, so this is quite apt!) she can revert back to the "terrible twos" state
Then it is a case of a short sharp smack on the bum - not even enough to really notice, but it's moreso the ritual of what will happen if they/she doesn't do as they're told.
This happened yesterday. 3yr old was over-tired from Nursery, and apparently (although I did chuckle to myself), she was a sh1tbag with our Childminder () - her punishment was to sit on the naughty step (obviously, childminders can't smack)
When I came to pick her up, it blatantly obvious that she was tired. She played up whilst I was there, and the childminder backed off (she doesn't beleive in smacking her own kids too). Child was told. told again. Warned with the countdown from 3 otherwise there would be a "smack your bum"
Countdown came and went. She received a smack. She cried, but then wanted me to pick her up for a cuddle and to be put in the car seat.
But this is the exact same method that I was brought up with, and I'm (within reason) a perfectly normal person, not traumatised by being smacked as a child!
Dan
We find (as I'm sure other parents do to) each kid tries to push differently (there's no apparent knowledge forum between them, such as a FAQ, to determine boundaries
)But, this also brings into question who is perceived as the ultimate authority figure in the household.... If your wife had have said it, would he have listened and obeyed?
My wife and I don't use the naughty step, as if my Wife can't get the kids (3 & 6) to "comply", I get involved.
A stern word usually works, but when the 3 yr-old is tired (she's started Nursery a couple of weeks ago, so this is quite apt!) she can revert back to the "terrible twos" state
Then it is a case of a short sharp smack on the bum - not even enough to really notice, but it's moreso the ritual of what will happen if they/she doesn't do as they're told.
This happened yesterday. 3yr old was over-tired from Nursery, and apparently (although I did chuckle to myself), she was a sh1tbag with our Childminder (
) - her punishment was to sit on the naughty step (obviously, childminders can't smack)When I came to pick her up, it blatantly obvious that she was tired. She played up whilst I was there, and the childminder backed off (she doesn't beleive in smacking her own kids too). Child was told. told again. Warned with the countdown from 3 otherwise there would be a "smack your bum"
Countdown came and went. She received a smack. She cried, but then wanted me to pick her up for a cuddle and to be put in the car seat.
But this is the exact same method that I was brought up with, and I'm (within reason) a perfectly normal person, not traumatised by being smacked as a child!
Dan
30 September 2006, 10:05 AM
#56
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intersting comments.
one comment though that makes me laugh, reasoning with a 3 year old!!
there children ffs, they dont understand the concept of reasoning, hence the predicament your in,
just leave them! after a while they get bored, once they realise you play mean hardball they wont do it again!!
mart
one comment though that makes me laugh, reasoning with a 3 year old!!
there children ffs, they dont understand the concept of reasoning, hence the predicament your in,
just leave them! after a while they get bored, once they realise you play mean hardball they wont do it again!!
mart
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