sti-04!!

Am off till the 8th of january

kingofturds

iTrader: (1)

bah ******* humbug

sti-04!!

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

I dont know what he's on about, he never goes out any more, has to live on past glories !

More of which later.......

The Chief

Went to the WSB (World Super Bikes) once a few years back at Donnington - by Christ that is a weekend i will never forget.

Having never been previously a mate turned up in his tranny van whilst a few of us and a couple of others (who actually had bikes) were riding down.
I was told to have a right good dump just before we set off as the portaloo's tended to be a bit unfit after a weekend of abuse on a hot summers weekend.

Within 10 minutes of arriving we had upset the security and told them to f*** off because we wouldn't park where they wanted us to - anyway after about 20 of them surrounding us, we said that we had already started drinking and thus if we moved our vehicle we would be drink driving and although on private land we could not be held accountable if we ran over anyones bike/tent, so eventually they buggered off.

We took around a crate of stella each and god knows how many bottles of Bacardi.

Basically it started out quite respectble but then people started riding Blades and R1's absolutely trollied and butt naked, people were Van surfing and basically things were getting carried away.

Everything was fine until we started a fire.
We had half a Tranny van full of wood that came from excess waste from a kitchen factory, at around 2 in the morning and after all our beer had been drunk we tucked into some neat Barcardi and proceeded to chuck all this wood on in one go.

One of the lads took his son and borrowed his bosses 400 quid tent, some geodesic job that would have been more at home up the side of Everest.
Instead due to its close proximity to the fire it ended up with great big burn holes in it. you coudl literally stick your head through the holes they were that big.

We woke in the morning and looked outside. the resin that was inside the wood it had covered a massive area of tents and flash bikes and motors in this gluey white crap that you could not get off. Many tents had holes in them. we f***ked off sharpish to watch the bikes before we got collared about it.

SiPie

and the exact relevance to your story is.............?

j4ckos mate

only cos youd shout your mouth off about the present glories
they do happen but not when your about.

grim reaper

I tend not to drink.it goes straight through me

The Chief

So you dont need to use the Portaloos all weekend.

Ask anyone who has attended WSB at Donnington.
Dont be so feckin' picky

Bateman

A tip for festivals or a bad story,

Dave and I thought it would be a good idea to visit Glastonbury , it was the 25th Anniversay so what better one to attend. We didn’t have much money, an Austin Metro and copious amounts of class C ‘and something to role it up in. Well we climbed both walls and eventually got inside the grounds, fantastic. Spent the first night partaking in the party spirit that the West Country has to offer.

Now , it was about 10.30am Saturday morning and Dave had headed off to get us a drink of Cider from the Cider Bus. I was shattered, I could hardly stand, what was I to do? Then like a gift from the Gods I spotted a St John Ambulance, it had a very well used Wheel chair fastened to the back of it. Now I wasn’t feeling the best so I thought here goes this must be for me.

I get this wheel chair off the van (ambulance), wasnt to hard , set it up and sit in it awaiting Daves return, “Hello Mate, You ok” says this Ozzy guy, coming across the field towards me carrying 2 massive 99 cones (ice creams) “what you upto mate” , I said “ waiting my friend , he get me back to my tent” , “No worries, hold these I will push you, where is your tent”…..
SO here I am eating to Ice creams getting pushed upto the top of the greenpeace field by this nice dude and his girlfriend.
Now he leaves me at the top and goes on his way, I have to get back to Dave , I get up and turn the wheel chair around to go back down the hill , “OI !!! what you F##### doing you W######” in an Australlian voice, I was off like a shot back down the hill. Ice cream all over the place, my hands burning from trying to slow the dragster looking seat with wheels down... straight into the dance tent and the jalopy tips on its side.... i am then helped up by more helpful nice people.......

Kept that wheel chair for 2 years, until someone stole it

davegtt

I shouldnt drink really with the things I get upto, get very easily carried away but its all good fun and I dont mind laughing at myself afterwards. Ranging from being locked up for the night, climbing horses and generally falling about everywhere. Only saturday I fell off my barstool after a 12hour session going head first because I didnt want to save myself at the thought of spilling my pint. Got a nice lump on my head this week I just dont learn sometimes. Its all on the CCTV in the local which has been passed around for everyone to see already

RMA26

Horse Riding, LMFAO – I sadly missed this

You forgot drinking vodka with Russian Birds mate, or throwing Sambuca back as soon as it hits the sides

davegtt

Ahhh yes drinking straight Vodka with a couple of Russian birds til I passed out was entertaining

Try not being a lightweight next time and you would have seen it all that night

RMA26

You wait mate...........

The Chief

Theres a guy at work who just cannot take his beer at all.
he turns feckin' silly after he has had a few drinks., not nasty just bloody silly and childish i.e. jumping off telephone boxes. he should know better as he is 34 yo.

last xmas eve we all went for a nice afternoon drink where he proceeded to get that pissed her actually fell in the fire at my local, how the f*** he did not get seriosuly hurt i do not know.

anyway - he's up for a drink again when we finish on Friday.
I'll keep you posted

davegtt

Class. Did you all pull him out? if that happened with my mates around they would have got the fire poke out and made sure he stayed in

SiPie

Don't pad your tales out so much with non-consequential irrelevancies

The Chief

la la la - bugger off back to your drums

Squizz

Mine's fairly tame

Went to Le Mans for my Stag-Do in 2002.

We'd all consumed a lot of a special champagne/vodka/tango cocktail from a yellow washing up bowl after a day of warm lager...

A friend who is afraid of heights ended up at the top of a ferris wheel thingy walking around the edge of the T-Cup style platform and gobbing on unsuspecting passers-by.

I was dumped into a Bungee-cage next to a 60 year old who'd come with the group and away it went. As I was shooting into the air at 60mph+ I considered the fact I'd previously done one of these out of choice while sober, so the lads hadn't really got me at all!

I then remember sobering up a little and finding myself wrapped in a Danish flag, when I wrestled myself free of it, I found some woman's naked rump in my face! I was in a big crowd of blokes in the back of a lorry which served as the theatre for a band of strippers. Quality!

bobsabuilder

Couple of old pics (Dec 02) of a mate that can't take his booze... The best pics I couldn't possibly post!






Exif Data:
Date/Time: 2002-12-17 00:45:09

KiwiGTI

I heard on one stag night where the bloke was put in a bath full of food colouring - he looked like the Incredible Hulk and it took ages for it to come out of his skin.

Abdabz

I guess one of my daftest gafts was this one:
I had been to a sportsmans dinner two weeks before my mates 25th. The Dinner was at Southport and on one of the tables was the actual dwarf/midget who was R2D2 in Star Wars
So two weeks later, I went to the Trafford Centre and worked my way through a gallon or two of vodka redbull and a few bottles of champers before staggering into a bar/club called Tiggys.
Sitting on a stool at the bar was a dwarf, and in our drunken haze, we pondered if it might be the man from the legendary movie enjoying his stay in north west blighty...
After a brief "could it be", "nah", "It might be", I was challenged to ask him face to face.
I staggered over to this fella and asked him:
"Excuse me, are you R2D2?"
The guy retorted
"F@ck Off", then took an aimless swing at me from his lofty perch. I stpped back and collapsed on the floor crying with laughter being dragged away by hysterical friends.
We concluded he may well have featured in the movie "Time Bandits", but definately not in Star Wars

7 years on, each time we see a vertically challenged gentleman I am asked to make the same approach...

Ben v7

You harsh ba5tard!!

Bet he was a barrel of laughs when he woke up in the morning.

Atleast you didn't shave his eyebrows... he looked very odd for a long time.

Mate of mine rammed a snooker cue up some guys **** when he was passed out. No idea why he did that - guy had some fairly serious internal bleeding and was very 'concerned' about what had happened to him.

I still remember that legendary night where me and my mates slipped into this club in smallish groups. Were only a couple of bouncers and we took the place over - no way could they of handled us. Still remember throwing up all over the place right in the middle of this bar/club with my mates chanting and cheering!! Dancing on tables - just mayhem... Other mates throwing up as well - one mate swinging his shirt around his head etc we just carried on drinking, couldn't care less, spilling booze all over the place, consuming a terrific amount... poor bouncers just looked on completely helpless. Why they didn't call for backup or police I'll never know... was a big big night for us that one as a huge bar crawl and day of drinking came before this.

speedymonkey

Did that to a friend of mine using toothpaste on his eyebrows, but nothing like as bad as that, that made me laugh so hard

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

We got a girl to sew a lads socks together, made him get up and he did a sort of Mick Jagger walk and couldnt work out what was up.

We broke into an old delapidated house, you can tell them the rest mate...

JM shagged Nellie Boswell (or a very good look alike) of Bread in Blackpool.