Ambulance has just arrived for mum...
25 June 2008, 09:36 PM
#91
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lol nightmare is the story of my life recently mate, but make the best of each day and not let it drag you down 
Tomorrow will be full of more panic, worrying about what its gonna be like when im gone, will mum stay in as long as she needs etc.
She is not eating at the mo, so should NOT go home. But telling her that falls on deaf ears.
Tomorrow will be full of more panic, worrying about what its gonna be like when im gone, will mum stay in as long as she needs etc.
She is not eating at the mo, so should NOT go home. But telling her that falls on deaf ears.
25 June 2008, 09:49 PM
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She is on oxygen for 24 hrs for however long it takes for her to breathe easier Snazy, they won't allow her to go home.Also the amount of drugs and pain killers she is taking, they can't be bought over the counter.
Last edited by ScooByer Trade; 25 June 2008 at 09:51 PM.
25 June 2008, 10:15 PM
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Take me for example, i was involved in an accident whilst riding a motorbike.I hit a dry stone wall in a bend doing 70 mph, because some bellend thought it would be funny to accelerate as i passed him.I went to the Maccelsfield hospital first and after there i went home. This is the reality if you fall off a motorcycle in the situation i was involved in, i live in a detached 3 bed house and would take me an hour to go from my bedroom upstairs to the lounge (one flight of stairs).1 day later i couldn't get out of my bed to stand up straight, because of neumonia and my lungs were filling with blood. I was on oxygen for approximatly a month and a half.That is the reason i don't ride sportsbikes now, i still own a motorbike and it's a dakar trail/roadbike.I recollect the nurses coming around to me at least twice a day with tablets.I'm sorry for being so miserable Snazy.
25 June 2008, 11:23 PM
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Na its not I cant cook or the food is rubbish, anything she eats just makes her sick.
With regards to them discharging her, they have already said quite clearly they WONT, but they cant stop her discharging herself.
She is very determined at times, and if the mood hits, she will just do the off, regardless of the danger it may put her in.
She either has a poor understanding of her condition, or blatent disregard lol, probably the latter.
I think with the COPD too, she is gonna be on the oxygen for some time yet, against her will of course. Although I say that, but she is getting used to it slowly
Im away from Friday evening, but as I say, I have a couple of friends popping in to see her almost daily, to make sure she has all she needs, and is as fit and well as can be expected.
Not even sure when she will be released yet. Told her tonight I would almost rather she stayed in til I got back, then I would know she was in good hands
Mum is on co-codamol 4 times a day I believe, and has her vitals checked every 4 hours. 2 stomach injections daily, plus a fair few more of course.
My concerns now are...
Will my sister check up on her once home
Will my sister try and stop her coming out if they want to keep her in
Will my mum call for help if she comes out and gets ill again
They are the main ones, but the big one of her seeking help should be taken care of by friends
Im hoping my sister will prove me wrong on this one, but I have a sneeky feeling that she wont. Waiting game I guess. Hoping to get to speak with the doctors tomorrow morning on their rounds, and get a good idea what to expect.
Cheers for the replies guys
With regards to them discharging her, they have already said quite clearly they WONT, but they cant stop her discharging herself.
She is very determined at times, and if the mood hits, she will just do the off, regardless of the danger it may put her in.
She either has a poor understanding of her condition, or blatent disregard lol, probably the latter.
I think with the COPD too, she is gonna be on the oxygen for some time yet, against her will of course. Although I say that, but she is getting used to it slowly
Im away from Friday evening, but as I say, I have a couple of friends popping in to see her almost daily, to make sure she has all she needs, and is as fit and well as can be expected.
Not even sure when she will be released yet. Told her tonight I would almost rather she stayed in til I got back, then I would know she was in good hands
Mum is on co-codamol 4 times a day I believe, and has her vitals checked every 4 hours. 2 stomach injections daily, plus a fair few more of course.
My concerns now are...
Will my sister check up on her once home
Will my sister try and stop her coming out if they want to keep her in
Will my mum call for help if she comes out and gets ill again
They are the main ones, but the big one of her seeking help should be taken care of by friends
Im hoping my sister will prove me wrong on this one, but I have a sneeky feeling that she wont. Waiting game I guess. Hoping to get to speak with the doctors tomorrow morning on their rounds, and get a good idea what to expect.
Cheers for the replies guys
25 June 2008, 11:41 PM
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once it becomes a pink OK second time it goes to negative, so thats 2 people both clicking thumbs down.
Dont really care, but if it was on purpose, it saddens me to know there are such silent critics amongst us
Either way, my sister is useless, im going to Florida, and im also about to leave for the hospital now, so catch y'all later
Dont really care, but if it was on purpose, it saddens me to know there are such silent critics amongst us
Either way, my sister is useless, im going to Florida, and im also about to leave for the hospital now, so catch y'all later
You look after yourself and have a great holiday. Your Sister will come good, I am sure.
26 June 2008, 07:16 AM
#98
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If people don't want the thread then we don't want them some people do work in mysterious ways!
You deserve your holiday, yes it will be on your mind while you are away at what is happening and if your sister is doing her bit, she has to share some of this, it isn't about her it's about your mum. Tell your sister what you want, don't ask her! Sometimes you have to be harsh and knock some sense into people about how the situation actually is.
I was given an anti sickness drug while I was in hospital, cyklozine (sp?), it was the only one that worked for me, made me feel weird but helped me to start eating again once I was allowed to, still felt as though I would be sick but I wasn't, horrible feeling but you just have to get past it to make yourself better.
Enjoy your holiday, are you going to seaworld? I would love to go there, take some pics for me if you do
some people do work in mysterious ways!You deserve your holiday, yes it will be on your mind while you are away at what is happening and if your sister is doing her bit, she has to share some of this, it isn't about her it's about your mum. Tell your sister what you want, don't ask her! Sometimes you have to be harsh and knock some sense into people about how the situation actually is.
I was given an anti sickness drug while I was in hospital, cyklozine (sp?), it was the only one that worked for me, made me feel weird but helped me to start eating again once I was allowed to, still felt as though I would be sick but I wasn't, horrible feeling but you just have to get past it to make yourself better.
Enjoy your holiday, are you going to seaworld? I would love to go there, take some pics for me if you do
26 June 2008, 09:35 AM
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Cheers Julz, I will see what she is on when I get in there in a mo and see what else is available, if she has not tried that one already lol
Seaworld, yeah of course lol. There are a couple of pics here from last year. CSOC Gallery - Florida '07
Im sure it will all work out with mum, but I can see my phone bill being high, with daily calls etc. Oh well, she is worth it
As for TELLING my sister. I TOLD her not to come to the hospital last night as mum was not in the best state of mind. 10 mins later she tells me she is on her way, with kids in tow (unfed, apparently they can wait) and her boyfriend. She arrived at the door, my mum groaned, and the conversation died. Half hour later I left, with my sister having asked, how you feeling , and when are you coming home.....
Cheers to everyone who has said I deserve the holiday. I would not go that far, deserve..... I have only done what I should do, so dont feel deserving, but if you guys insist Thank you.
Off to the hospital now, see the doctors and see how everything is today. Updates soon
Seaworld, yeah of course lol. There are a couple of pics here from last year. CSOC Gallery - Florida '07
Im sure it will all work out with mum, but I can see my phone bill being high, with daily calls etc. Oh well, she is worth it
As for TELLING my sister. I TOLD her not to come to the hospital last night as mum was not in the best state of mind. 10 mins later she tells me she is on her way, with kids in tow (unfed, apparently they can wait) and her boyfriend. She arrived at the door, my mum groaned, and the conversation died. Half hour later I left, with my sister having asked, how you feeling , and when are you coming home.....
Cheers to everyone who has said I deserve the holiday. I would not go that far, deserve..... I have only done what I should do, so dont feel deserving, but if you guys insist
Thank you.Off to the hospital now, see the doctors and see how everything is today. Updates soon
26 June 2008, 12:17 PM
#101
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Snazy,
I think you have to tell the hospital that while you are away that your mum would not have anyone to look after her, and what is likely to happen with your sister and her children being dumped on your mum if she comes out of the hospital. They should realise that your mum would have to be very fit to be allowed out in safety.
Have you actually given your sister the hard truth straight from the shoulder so to speak. Sometimes you really have to cause some real embarrassment to get the message across.
Les
I think you have to tell the hospital that while you are away that your mum would not have anyone to look after her, and what is likely to happen with your sister and her children being dumped on your mum if she comes out of the hospital. They should realise that your mum would have to be very fit to be allowed out in safety.
Have you actually given your sister the hard truth straight from the shoulder so to speak. Sometimes you really have to cause some real embarrassment to get the message across.
Les
26 June 2008, 12:43 PM
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Les if I tried any harder I would have to pin my mum to the wall and use her as a diagram !! lol
The message dont get home... How do I know. Its like this..
I have just been to the hospital and text my sister to update her. Consultant says she might be out in 2 days.
I text this exact line to my sister and get the response, "as in Monday or Tuesday?" My understanding of this is, she is so one tracked minded at the mo about sodding off to Somerset again for the funeral, her only interest is to see if mum will be home to look after the kids!
2 days is clearly NOT Mon or Tues.
She has just text back further to my reply to the above to say "oh well I will play it by ear for now" Still not getting the message mum is not well enough to look after the kids. Push comes to shove me and my sister will have a VERY verbal clash before I go away.
I will be pointing out to the hospital that im concerned about help at home for mum. So they can arrange a daily visit for her, and I can make sure friends are about to pop in on her.
So an update on mum after all that....
She is off the drip now, and the oxygen for now, just to see how her vitals hold up without the support. She has eaten a little bowl of porridge this morning which is better than she normally manages.
In good spirits and a lot more alert and awake now too.
I took her for a toddle in the park earlier, she made it slowly but under her own steam too, which is another good sign
lol just to finish up, my sister has just text back again..
Knowing we are talking Sat Sun or Mon here for mums release, her response was....
"im meant to be going somerset for the funeral, so i'll just take each day as it comes. Can be back to pick her up whenever needed."
Very noble, but missing the point one thinks.
The message dont get home... How do I know. Its like this..
I have just been to the hospital and text my sister to update her. Consultant says she might be out in 2 days.
I text this exact line to my sister and get the response, "as in Monday or Tuesday?" My understanding of this is, she is so one tracked minded at the mo about sodding off to Somerset again for the funeral, her only interest is to see if mum will be home to look after the kids!
2 days is clearly NOT Mon or Tues.
She has just text back further to my reply to the above to say "oh well I will play it by ear for now" Still not getting the message mum is not well enough to look after the kids. Push comes to shove me and my sister will have a VERY verbal clash before I go away.
I will be pointing out to the hospital that im concerned about help at home for mum. So they can arrange a daily visit for her, and I can make sure friends are about to pop in on her.
So an update on mum after all that....
She is off the drip now, and the oxygen for now, just to see how her vitals hold up without the support. She has eaten a little bowl of porridge this morning which is better than she normally manages.
In good spirits and a lot more alert and awake now too.
I took her for a toddle in the park earlier, she made it slowly but under her own steam too, which is another good sign
lol just to finish up, my sister has just text back again..
Knowing we are talking Sat Sun or Mon here for mums release, her response was....
"im meant to be going somerset for the funeral, so i'll just take each day as it comes. Can be back to pick her up whenever needed."
Very noble, but missing the point one thinks.
26 June 2008, 12:47 PM
#103
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Can't you try a text like the following to your sister
MUM NOT WELL ENOUGH TO LOOK AFTER KIDS.....UNDERSTAND? YES OR NO?
Go on, give it a go (and have a great holiday and try your best to chill)
MUM NOT WELL ENOUGH TO LOOK AFTER KIDS.....UNDERSTAND? YES OR NO?
Go on, give it a go (and have a great holiday and try your best to chill)
26 June 2008, 12:50 PM
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Do you have the imprint of brickwork as a permanent fixture on your forehead yet? 
Les is talking sense, just tell her straight. If not, instead of a holiday, you'll be needing a rather snazy (pun intended) white jacket with the arms tied around the back.
Les is talking sense, just tell her straight. If not, instead of a holiday, you'll be needing a rather snazy (pun intended) white jacket with the arms tied around the back.
26 June 2008, 12:56 PM
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lol I will try that one Si, just getting the timing right. As soon as I say it she will switch it all around and say she had not even considered it, and how stupid and selfish I am for even thinking that. I have heard it all before lol.
As for the imprint, yup I do, so im gonna try headbutting something softer, like her skull !
Im slowly switching the stress off now, knowing mum is getting there is much easier on my mind. But the secondary worry is still there for sure.
Mum already knows my sister is out to take the ****.
Must be so heartbreaking for a parent to realise their 39 year old child is a selfish idiot! Mum speaks about her quite openly saying she is shocked and disappointed how she has turned out, and wonders if its her fault. I have made sure she does not think that way!
Wierd thing is, on the flip side, the other patients and ward staff think im lovely. Apparently mum has not run out of nice things to say about me yet, and they seem to agree with them all.
Personally I think im a bit of an ar$ehole at times lol
As for the imprint, yup I do, so im gonna try headbutting something softer, like her skull !
Im slowly switching the stress off now, knowing mum is getting there is much easier on my mind. But the secondary worry is still there for sure.
Mum already knows my sister is out to take the ****.
Must be so heartbreaking for a parent to realise their 39 year old child is a selfish idiot! Mum speaks about her quite openly saying she is shocked and disappointed how she has turned out, and wonders if its her fault. I have made sure she does not think that way!
Wierd thing is, on the flip side, the other patients and ward staff think im lovely. Apparently mum has not run out of nice things to say about me yet, and they seem to agree with them all.
Personally I think im a bit of an ar$ehole at times lol
26 June 2008, 01:04 PM
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Blimey, the updates just keep coming.
Sister has just said point blank she IS going to the funeral so wont be about.
At the same time the doctor has apparently just told mum she might be out tomorrow.
Now something tells me my sister will go to somerset over the weekend, which will leave no one home for mum....
Now the fun really starts....
Sister has just said point blank she IS going to the funeral so wont be about.
At the same time the doctor has apparently just told mum she might be out tomorrow.
Now something tells me my sister will go to somerset over the weekend, which will leave no one home for mum....
Now the fun really starts....
26 June 2008, 01:15 PM
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26 June 2008, 01:23 PM
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26 June 2008, 01:51 PM
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Yup the Stang is a convertible, and the SUV is already a Durango. Watch this space for honest opinions on it
lol @ the ar$ehole bit, im glad someone finally agrees
Oh and someone else thinks im always one too eh , sod ya haha.
Just had a brief text exchange with my sister, and she says "its not like mum needs someone there with her" and its a good thing "cos I cant do that"
Once I explained that they DO expect someone to be close to hand at all times, she got the hump about it, has started to strop and now said "well I wont bother going then" ooooooooooh! lol
Off to St Thomas's Hospital now to see one of my friends who is also in hospital at the mo, then hot foot it back to the hospital to see mum for the afternoon visit
Blimey its all go
26 June 2008, 02:37 PM
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Michael,
Is your sister older or younger than you? If she is younger then I can see how she might think that you should be doing all the looking after as you are the older brother. Even still, that is a very selfish way to be. Some people really don't "get" that they are seen by others as very selfish, they are totally unaware of it, perhaps your sister is one of them?
You've done your mum proud, and will continue to do so. Go and have your holiday, you bloody well deserve it. You need some R&R, as it seems no-one except you is going to take the responsibility of looking after your mum on. The last thing that needs to happen is for you to become ill because you're stressed, not eating, etc... due to caring for your mum without the support from your family.
You sister really does need a short, sharp shock. Yes, there has been a death that needs to be attended to, but it's not a direct blood relative of hers, whereas her mother is.
She needs to be told, in big letters, clear as possible, that your mum cannot and will not be looking after her kids (what's wrong with a babysitter?) as she MUST have someone looking after her. It is her responsibility being her daughter to actually lift a ******* finger and help her mother. Who took care of her (your sister) when she was a baby? who raised her, clothed her, fed her, and protected her? It's now the time to repay that debt in kind.
Is your sister older or younger than you? If she is younger then I can see how she might think that you should be doing all the looking after as you are the older brother. Even still, that is a very selfish way to be. Some people really don't "get" that they are seen by others as very selfish, they are totally unaware of it, perhaps your sister is one of them?
You've done your mum proud, and will continue to do so. Go and have your holiday, you bloody well deserve it. You need some R&R, as it seems no-one except you is going to take the responsibility of looking after your mum on. The last thing that needs to happen is for you to become ill because you're stressed, not eating, etc... due to caring for your mum without the support from your family.
You sister really does need a short, sharp shock. Yes, there has been a death that needs to be attended to, but it's not a direct blood relative of hers, whereas her mother is.
She needs to be told, in big letters, clear as possible, that your mum cannot and will not be looking after her kids (what's wrong with a babysitter?) as she MUST have someone looking after her. It is her responsibility being her daughter to actually lift a ******* finger and help her mother. Who took care of her (your sister) when she was a baby? who raised her, clothed her, fed her, and protected her? It's now the time to repay that debt in kind.
26 June 2008, 08:09 PM
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Could not agree more Markus
Sister is older by 3 years.
Spent the day in hospitals today, and ended the day on a bang too.
Mum this morning, mate this afternoon (who is deteriorating fast) and then back to mum. Lots of walking and I am KNACKERED!
On walking home from the hospital tonight, 45 min walk, I just got to the bottom of my road, and...... BANG Car VS Bike RTA (RTI, RTC lol)
So been stood there for the past 45 mins helping with that. Will I ever get a break! lol
I am going to the hospital in the morning to see the doctors again to make sure they are not sending her home before she is eating properly. She was still turning food away this evening, so I have my doubts about her eating back at home.
I am going to have the holiday, or start it at least, and try and relax the best I can. On my return I am looking into leaving work, to make sure I can care for mum and see whats available for me if I do that. As well as getting as much around the house and home sorted as possible. Clear the gardens etc.
On a serious note, thank you to everyone who had given feedback on this thread, its honestly kept me going. I am like the walking dead right now, so have just ordered a Domino's and am gonna finish my evening stuffing pizza down my throat and packing
Thank you all
Sister is older by 3 years.
Spent the day in hospitals today, and ended the day on a bang too.
Mum this morning, mate this afternoon (who is deteriorating fast) and then back to mum. Lots of walking and I am KNACKERED!
On walking home from the hospital tonight, 45 min walk, I just got to the bottom of my road, and...... BANG Car VS Bike RTA (RTI, RTC lol)
So been stood there for the past 45 mins helping with that. Will I ever get a break! lol
I am going to the hospital in the morning to see the doctors again to make sure they are not sending her home before she is eating properly. She was still turning food away this evening, so I have my doubts about her eating back at home.
I am going to have the holiday, or start it at least, and try and relax the best I can. On my return I am looking into leaving work, to make sure I can care for mum and see whats available for me if I do that. As well as getting as much around the house and home sorted as possible. Clear the gardens etc.
On a serious note, thank you to everyone who had given feedback on this thread, its honestly kept me going. I am like the walking dead right now, so have just ordered a Domino's and am gonna finish my evening stuffing pizza down my throat and packing
Thank you all
26 June 2008, 10:58 PM
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26 June 2008, 11:11 PM
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lol dont fill me with false hope! My friends will come good, I have faith in that, but my sister............ lol !
I might add to my current blog but wont be doing a seperate one. This is a pretty static holiday really so nothing mega exciting.
FM cheers mate, we thought it would be a good idea Gatwick is usually good to us, lets see this time.
I might add to my current blog but wont be doing a seperate one. This is a pretty static holiday really so nothing mega exciting.
FM cheers mate, we thought it would be a good idea
Gatwick is usually good to us, lets see this time.
