Some humour for you miserable Victor Meldrew lot in NSR
24 January 2009, 06:17 PM
#31
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Sunny BELFAST
Posts: 19,408
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
After winning the US Election, Barack Obama was asked "What are your plans for defence?"
To which he replied "I'm gonna paint it de same colour as de house!"
feckin classic, i love sickipedia
To which he replied "I'm gonna paint it de same colour as de house!"
feckin classic, i love sickipedia
24 January 2009, 06:19 PM
#32
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Sunny BELFAST
Posts: 19,408
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
It has been reported this morning that the head gardener at the White House has today been sacked.
On protesting his innocence, he is reported as saying, "Honestly I did nothing wrong. All I did was to go into the Oval Office and asked if anyone had seen the spade."
On protesting his innocence, he is reported as saying, "Honestly I did nothing wrong. All I did was to go into the Oval Office and asked if anyone had seen the spade."
24 January 2009, 06:22 PM
#34
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Sunny BELFAST
Posts: 19,408
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the side-effects she was experiencing.
"Doctor, the hormones you’ve been giving me have really helped, but I`m afraid that you’re giving me too much. I’ve started growing hair in places that I’ve never grown hair before."
The doctor reassured her. "A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has this hair appeared?"
"On my *****."
"Doctor, the hormones you’ve been giving me have really helped, but I`m afraid that you’re giving me too much. I’ve started growing hair in places that I’ve never grown hair before."
The doctor reassured her. "A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has this hair appeared?"
"On my *****."
24 January 2009, 06:27 PM
#35
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Sunny BELFAST
Posts: 19,408
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
A couple getting quite hot with the heavy petting... So the lad decides to chance his arm...
"Can I put the end in....?"
"Not yet, you know I'm still a virgin..."
"Go on, I'll only slip the end in?"
"I'm not sure..."
"Go on, just the end?"
"Okay then but just the end"
WALLOP...........
"I thought you were only going to put the end in?"
"Aye, the end nearest my bollocks!!!"
"Can I put the end in....?"
"Not yet, you know I'm still a virgin..."
"Go on, I'll only slip the end in?"
"I'm not sure..."
"Go on, just the end?"
"Okay then but just the end"
WALLOP...........
"I thought you were only going to put the end in?"
"Aye, the end nearest my bollocks!!!"
24 January 2009, 09:30 PM
#36
Scooby Senior
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,546
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Little Patrick asked for a bike for his Birthday.
His Dad said "We'd get you one but our mortgage is eighty grand and your mum has lost her job"
Next day Patrick walked out with his suitcase packed.
His Dad asked "Where you going son?"
Patrick replied "I walked past your room last night and heard you tell mum you where pulling out, then i heard mum tell you to wait because she was coming too. So im not staying here on my own with an eighty grand mortgage and no ******* bike!!"
His Dad said "We'd get you one but our mortgage is eighty grand and your mum has lost her job"
Next day Patrick walked out with his suitcase packed.
His Dad asked "Where you going son?"
Patrick replied "I walked past your room last night and heard you tell mum you where pulling out, then i heard mum tell you to wait because she was coming too. So im not staying here on my own with an eighty grand mortgage and no ******* bike!!"
Last edited by SCOsazOBY; 24 January 2009 at 09:31 PM.
26 January 2009, 08:16 AM
#38
Scooby Senior
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Scotchland
Posts: 6,566
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
27 January 2009, 11:16 AM
#41
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 39,877
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Les
27 January 2009, 11:25 AM
#42
R.I.P.
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 7,036
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Atheists
What is the biggest problem for an atheist?
No one to talk to during orgasm.
I told my mate I'm an atheist
He said, "I don't believe you."
I replied, "I swear to God"
What film do atheists watch on Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th street
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
No one to talk to during orgasm.
I told my mate I'm an atheist
He said, "I don't believe you."
I replied, "I swear to God"
What film do atheists watch on Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th street
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post