Am I missing something here, or am I just a c***
28 August 2009, 01:22 AM
#61
Exactley! why?? I was like you once Snazy, a soft c*nt, no offence there
mate. Ii bought my mam and dads house 3 years ago, the house all 6 kids
grew up! 3 of them (boys) always came to ME running for a roof over their
heads when things went **** up for them, and me being soft took them in.
Didnt charge rent and put food in their bellies while they spent their money
on beer and crap and taking the **** by not cleaning up after them etc
etc. My girlfriend hated them in the end and in the end i booted them out!
had enough of their crap We had 2 daughters to think of too. And we didnt
even get a thank you from them! not even a christmas card!!!!!! I know
family is family mate but if thats the things they do then f*ck them!!!!!
mate. Ii bought my mam and dads house 3 years ago, the house all 6 kids
grew up! 3 of them (boys) always came to ME running for a roof over their
heads when things went **** up for them, and me being soft took them in.
Didnt charge rent and put food in their bellies while they spent their money
on beer and crap and taking the **** by not cleaning up after them etc
etc. My girlfriend hated them in the end and in the end i booted them out!
had enough of their crap We had 2 daughters to think of too. And we didnt
even get a thank you from them! not even a christmas card!!!!!! I know
family is family mate but if thats the things they do then f*ck them!!!!!
Snazy, by your own account, she has been nothing but selfish, especially how she has gone on regarding your Mam. And she is clearly still acting in the same way. You have been kind lending out your car, and she still expects you to do more, but the fact you are paying for phones amazes me.
They are her kids, leave her to it. It's very kind of you, but you shouldn't have to support her like this, especially as she gives nothing in return (by that I mean any thanks, not so much anything of monetary value).
A long while back, we took my brother in, not long after the split of my Mam and Dad. Quite honestly, he was lazy, didn't help out at all, paid nothing and ate us out of house and home (providing nothing for himself), while earning a fairly good wage, well more than Mam. It was only a brief period, but a bit appreciation never goes amiss. That is only the half of it.
Despite all that, when she got cancer, he could barely bother. Oh yes, he turned up at the hospital in uniform, keeping up appearances a couple of times. Once she was home, he only bothered coming once, iirc.
Like your sister, he is more concerned about himself, and while I'll always love him, I would never bend over backwards for him, nor should you with your sister. She will never appreciate it, so don't waste your time.
28 August 2009, 01:24 AM
#62
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Lol the phone thing is a difficult one to explain. Unless you saw the day to day goings on I don't think I could explain it properly. So prob best not bothering to try to haha.
But just so its understood, it was my idea and choice, no one elses.
As for the car, no sign of it, no text or call to say why. So just another shocking example of her carefree attitude towards people that try and help.
53 I would be exactly the same mate, but apparently borrowing a car for 60p a days worth of road tax is a bad deal!
Trust me the family thing is not a pressure point for me, not for the adults anyway, the kids I try and look out for a bit more, but once I know someone has taken the ****, that's that. My nieces mobile, she can kiss bye bye to that. So my sister can start paying for that now. Sod them.
Jods, it will be SORN on the last day of the tax. If she has not contacted me by tomorrow about returning it, I will thinl of something lol...
But just so its understood, it was my idea and choice, no one elses.
As for the car, no sign of it, no text or call to say why. So just another shocking example of her carefree attitude towards people that try and help.
53 I would be exactly the same mate, but apparently borrowing a car for 60p a days worth of road tax is a bad deal!
Trust me the family thing is not a pressure point for me, not for the adults anyway, the kids I try and look out for a bit more, but once I know someone has taken the ****, that's that. My nieces mobile, she can kiss bye bye to that. So my sister can start paying for that now. Sod them.
Jods, it will be SORN on the last day of the tax. If she has not contacted me by tomorrow about returning it, I will thinl of something lol...
28 August 2009, 01:30 AM
#63
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Just seen your later reply Lisa, sounds pretty similar I reckon.
Funny thing is, she is being an arsehole now, not coming round again etc, but in under a month when she drops, the world will change and this will become the "drop the kids and baby off" house, and mum will accept it! Which will **** me off.
Like I say the phone thing is a personal choice. I guess I try to help her kids because of the absence of my own. But won't have the **** taken out of me.
I'm really trying not to let this **** me off too much right now. I didn't realise being kind and helpful was so damn stressful! But seems it is. And based on that, its time to look after number one
Funny thing is, she is being an arsehole now, not coming round again etc, but in under a month when she drops, the world will change and this will become the "drop the kids and baby off" house, and mum will accept it! Which will **** me off.
Like I say the phone thing is a personal choice. I guess I try to help her kids because of the absence of my own. But won't have the **** taken out of me.
I'm really trying not to let this **** me off too much right now. I didn't realise being kind and helpful was so damn stressful! But seems it is. And based on that, its time to look after number one
28 August 2009, 01:30 AM
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Report it stolen. If questioned (or worse interviewed) say you wanted it returned and did not allow or permit them to drive it as they know the tax is out. That is your **** covered if the police ask you why they have it. 
28 August 2009, 01:35 AM
#65
Snaz - Lisa is SPOT ON.
I hesitate to call it "Tough Love" - forcing someone to stand on their own two feet. When I was at Uni (many decades ago) I got a grant of around £2,500 a year. Obviously I spent most of that on Rent, food, books and beer (although not in that order )
My Dad would occasionally send me food tokens (cheques) - Totalled about £2K over the 3 years - But only on the understanding that I would repay with interest at bank rate plus 2% after I left with or without the qualification.
Some may think that is harsh but I think he was right. I've taken the pi55 sometimes in the past as most people will have done but have learnt that the only way to really REALLY help people is to push them into helping themselves.
What's that age old saying?
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, Give him a fishing rod and you feed him for a lifetime?
I hesitate to call it "Tough Love" - forcing someone to stand on their own two feet. When I was at Uni (many decades ago) I got a grant of around £2,500 a year. Obviously I spent most of that on Rent, food, books and beer (although not in that order
) My Dad would occasionally send me food tokens (cheques) - Totalled about £2K over the 3 years - But only on the understanding that I would repay with interest at bank rate plus 2% after I left with or without the qualification.
Some may think that is harsh but I think he was right. I've taken the pi55 sometimes in the past as most people will have done but have learnt that the only way to really REALLY help people is to push them into helping themselves.
What's that age old saying?
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, Give him a fishing rod and you feed him for a lifetime?
28 August 2009, 01:47 AM
#66
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If only i could choose my family Lisa lol. Snazy, you do look after number one and let her
know that as well, and tell her to stand on her own two feet just like jods said. From
experience i know it can be hard sometimes as all my brothers had was a good paid job!!
But since then they have not come running and done it them selfs! And to this day i still
have not got my crimbo card! LOL
know that as well, and tell her to stand on her own two feet just like jods said. From
experience i know it can be hard sometimes as all my brothers had was a good paid job!!
But since then they have not come running and done it them selfs! And to this day i still
have not got my crimbo card! LOL
28 August 2009, 07:35 AM
#67
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Kin 'ell Michael, I thought I was the soft type, but you sir are Summin else 
Maybe there is a personal reason for paying the bills, so I won't go into that on here, but the car thing... dude, you are really having the **** squeezed out of you and re-drenched on your bonce.
Pull your finger out, go round get the car and leave it at that. Very simply remind your sister how much it would cost to rent a car privately if you weren't there to be taken advantage of. And stop wasting your wages on other people, save the money as you'll need it one day, trust me.
Maybe there is a personal reason for paying the bills, so I won't go into that on here, but the car thing... dude, you are really having the **** squeezed out of you and re-drenched on your bonce.
Pull your finger out, go round get the car and leave it at that. Very simply remind your sister how much it would cost to rent a car privately if you weren't there to be taken advantage of. And stop wasting your wages on other people, save the money as you'll need it one day, trust me.
28 August 2009, 07:52 AM
#68
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I think you know inside youre being used here. You try to do the honourable thing, help your sister out and she's abusing it. I think its time to draw a line.
My brother can be similar. I pay for a lot of his things, even giving him cars ( my old twin turbo supra ) for free, and yet he still looks at me like I should service it :-).
I say take your car back. Also, I wouldnt mind if your sister was using it, but for her to give it too her man, then no no no no. Also, although insured, what happens if he gets any points, fines ?? All comes back to you.
The old saying "Never a lender, borrower be" ring's true here. You could just sell the car to them ?
SBK
My brother can be similar. I pay for a lot of his things, even giving him cars ( my old twin turbo supra ) for free, and yet he still looks at me like I should service it :-).
I say take your car back. Also, I wouldnt mind if your sister was using it, but for her to give it too her man, then no no no no. Also, although insured, what happens if he gets any points, fines ?? All comes back to you.
The old saying "Never a lender, borrower be" ring's true here. You could just sell the car to them ?
SBK
28 August 2009, 08:52 AM
#69
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If there are any tickets, they will be directed straight to them. At the moment as there are a couple of days tax left, there is nothing I can get in trouble for as the keeper.
I should point out that if I get the car back now it will just sit on the drive as I cant drive it anyway. So me being without the car it kinda irrelivant. Im not saying that so I dont sound so soft. Im softer than a melted ice cream ffs lol.
As far as her other half using it goes, that I am fine with tbh. She is a terrible driver so its safer with him.
I guess the long and the short of it is, its not so much them having the car, its more the nerve of having the gesture thrown back in my face, because she feels its a liberty for them to be asked to tax it, so they can keep using the car while I am not (cant physically)
I think after 3 pages I am seeing a pattern here though lol.
Im sort of expecting contact today. Part of me thinks that she will tell the other half I want the car back, he will ask why, she will try and explain her problem with paying the tax, and he will feel it should be paid none the less.
He is thankfully a nice guy and not a **** taker, so far more likely to see sense.
I should point out that if I get the car back now it will just sit on the drive as I cant drive it anyway. So me being without the car it kinda irrelivant. Im not saying that so I dont sound so soft. Im softer than a melted ice cream ffs lol.
As far as her other half using it goes, that I am fine with tbh. She is a terrible driver so its safer with him.
I guess the long and the short of it is, its not so much them having the car, its more the nerve of having the gesture thrown back in my face, because she feels its a liberty for them to be asked to tax it, so they can keep using the car while I am not (cant physically)
I think after 3 pages I am seeing a pattern here though lol.
Im sort of expecting contact today. Part of me thinks that she will tell the other half I want the car back, he will ask why, she will try and explain her problem with paying the tax, and he will feel it should be paid none the less.
He is thankfully a nice guy and not a **** taker, so far more likely to see sense.
28 August 2009, 09:42 AM
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28 August 2009, 10:53 AM
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You have 2 options
1. Grow some *****, stop being a puff, sorn the car and tell the lazy bitch to sort her own phone out.
2. Act like a pusscake and give her a bigger weekly allowance so she does not complain to you as much
1. Grow some *****, stop being a puff, sorn the car and tell the lazy bitch to sort her own phone out.
2. Act like a pusscake and give her a bigger weekly allowance so she does not complain to you as much
28 August 2009, 11:05 AM
#76
Personally I think its a nice touch to look after the phones for your sister's kids. As a suggestion though if you don't like the charges they can rack up for you take the phones back, cancel the contracts and get them pay as you go phones. Give them £15.00 each a month in top up if you really want to.
You have been more than nice to your sister in the matter of your car. Do yourself a favour, take it back and give her a few local cab company numbers.
You have been more than nice to your sister in the matter of your car. Do yourself a favour, take it back and give her a few local cab company numbers.
28 August 2009, 11:19 AM
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Lol sara if I was worried about the condition of the car the keys would never have been handed over.
Like I say my whole point is gratitude, and selfish attitude. Expecting me to tax the car for them to use.
Micky, fair points and somewhere on the track I'm working on. Just spoken toi Orange, niece's phone will die shortly
Fitz, cheers mate, sounds like you kinda understand the point with the phones. Still not so much as a text apology from either of them for the spend.
Like I say my whole point is gratitude, and selfish attitude. Expecting me to tax the car for them to use.
Micky, fair points and somewhere on the track I'm working on. Just spoken toi Orange, niece's phone will die shortly
Fitz, cheers mate, sounds like you kinda understand the point with the phones. Still not so much as a text apology from either of them for the spend.
28 August 2009, 11:31 AM
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Snazy, you need to take off your top, stand in the mirror and learn to start growling at yourself, rrraaaaaahhhhhhhhh
Maybe do a few arm pumps, and work on getting your "man levels" back up
Maybe do a few arm pumps, and work on getting your "man levels" back up
28 August 2009, 12:34 PM
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lol trust me, right now if I had any more testoterone in my system it would be like being on roids!
All sorted now. Sister does not like me now, something to do with reading my blog and seeing what I wrote about her.
She said something about having feelings etc, I didnt catch the full story, I had lost interest.
But she can think what she wants to, I really dont have time to worry about other peoples feelings about me.
Shame that, but hey, I guess thats less stress for me, more walking for her, and less sob sob posts on SN from me (hurrah lol)
All sorted now. Sister does not like me now, something to do with reading my blog and seeing what I wrote about her.
She said something about having feelings etc, I didnt catch the full story, I had lost interest.
But she can think what she wants to, I really dont have time to worry about other peoples feelings about me.
Shame that, but hey, I guess thats less stress for me, more walking for her, and less sob sob posts on SN from me (hurrah lol)
28 August 2009, 02:00 PM
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28 August 2009, 02:29 PM
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Snazy, you and your mum are too good for your own good if you see what I mean. Mrs Leslie is just the same, she will do anything to help someone else regardless of their attitude, and human nature being what it is, she gets people taking advantage of her.
I really think that you have to take the bull by the horns, get your car back before you get done for no tax etc., and stop those phones. Apart from your own protection, you might even do them a favour by making them have to stand on their own two feet.
Let them whine as much as they like, just ask them to explain why they expect to get all this from you without showing any sign of personal responsibility in return.
Les
I really think that you have to take the bull by the horns, get your car back before you get done for no tax etc., and stop those phones. Apart from your own protection, you might even do them a favour by making them have to stand on their own two feet.
Let them whine as much as they like, just ask them to explain why they expect to get all this from you without showing any sign of personal responsibility in return.
Les
28 August 2009, 02:46 PM
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Phones are getting taken back as we speak. I will be more likely to lend the sims to people I know and trust with them. Someone might as well benefit as they are in contract.
As for the car, its at her other halfs work at the mo, so I have made it clear that I want it back as soon as it returns.
Got to be cruel to be kind, but its time to cut the strings I think.
As for the car, its at her other halfs work at the mo, so I have made it clear that I want it back as soon as it returns.
Got to be cruel to be kind, but its time to cut the strings I think.
28 August 2009, 02:49 PM
#88
Family is family, nothing wrong with helping them out, but hopefully they will notice soon enough how much you do for them and they might start appreciating your efforts.
You dont HAVE to do anything for them, maybe your sister will notice that soon.
Stick to your guns.
Oh and its Friday, put this all behind you and go get sideways.
You dont HAVE to do anything for them, maybe your sister will notice that soon.
Stick to your guns.
Oh and its Friday, put this all behind you and go get sideways.
28 August 2009, 03:27 PM
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Can't be bothered to read the whole thread, but my opinion on the original question is that you tell them to either tax it themselves, or you'll have it back and SORN it. I don't know why you're even asking us? 
It's obvious!
Anyway, what allowance are they giving you for putting mileage on your car? You are a bit soft on your sister anyway IIRC, with your mum etc....
It's obvious!Anyway, what allowance are they giving you for putting mileage on your car? You are a bit soft on your sister anyway IIRC, with your mum etc....