LG John

Lol, that is some very specific and targetted insulting

LG John

I was in a serious relationship in my early 20's and my g/f cheated on me with another guy, ending our relationship.

At the time I was devastated and even now, in my 30's, I can still identify the ripples of change that will no doubt continue down the years. By that I mean, the effect that event had on me as a person and the way I live my life.

Back then I was crushed with all the usual feelings of inadequacy and betrayal, and I don't really know her motives or reasons for cheating. Looking back now though, - and with a somewhat more liberal view - if all she wanted was a good fvck, then I'd have happily strummed one out in the corner while Pablo put her ankles behind her ears and drilled her out.

I'd be 10x more gutted if I caught my wife snuggling up to a guy, stroking his face, smiling at him and kissing him, than I would if she was bent over taking it in the can. Sex is sex....the cheating that really hurts is when your partner forms an emotional relationship with someone else. This is as good as telling you that you are incapable of meeting your partners needs and desires in life, and that hurts.

fitzscoob

In my late teens to mid twenties I was in my only long term relationship. Over that time I had a bit of a kiss and a drunken fumble with some girl I knew from the pub.

We didnt sleep together, but even so I couldnt cope with the guilt and after two or three days I confessed to my now ex, and we argued but eventually dealt with it.

We eventually split up and got back together many years down the line, but as we were discussing getting back together it turned out that she had slept with someone else, once a few years back. One of her friends brothers, so of course she had seen him out since and stuff.

After hearing this I can only describe my feeling as cold with rage. Once I heard that from her I pretty much terminated any thoughts of getting back with her. I personally couldnt get past it.

I know this could be a case of pot calling the kettle black, but I was shocked by the fact she had hidden it from me so easily.

Leslie

Everyone I have known who have cheated have said it was not worth the hassle in the end and if you get found out, it is the effective ruination of your marriage regardless of "forgive and forget" It won't ever be forgotten of course and your marriage will never be as it was. You might try to fool yourself that the sex was so much better-but it wont really have been!

If you value your marriage try to avoid it, if you don't just split and get on with it and put up with the eventuaL loneliness that follows!

Les

Hysteria1983

I cannot say it would have been, that is why we split. Bit if I had made the choice to stay together despite him not having kept it in my pants, I think it would be unfair to bring it up or use it as a way to spite the other person during arguments.

I say this be ause my bro is in this situation, they stayed together, and every argument results in this being brought up.
I think that forgiving someone is possible, but forgetting isn't.
But if you are making a constant reminder of what one person did to the other, it's just going to drain the love out if the relationship.

I am not saying that IS the case with cheating, simply my view on it at this current point in time

StickyMicky

Ohh yeah, i forgot to add, i once walked in my mates kitchen and my father had my mates mother on the kitchen table

That was a bit of a nightmare

All i can remember saying was "umm where do i put the cup?"
My old man is not with us now, but even to this day, my mother still does not know what i saw, she thinks she discovered the affair herself about a month later.

The funny thing was, looking back, it was going on for ages, my mother worked mornings, my old man would say "im just off out to sort a message" (while wearing aftershave) leaving me and workid alone to fight for an hour or so, but my other mate used to watch my dad drive down the road, pull over outside the house, pick her up and drive off

Would never have put the old man down as that type, not sure how he thought he would get away with it, it was his best mates wife afterall!?!

After the initial nuclear fallout, they stayed together, not sure why, he was blatantly up to no good not long before he died, reinforced by the fact that after he died and were tidying up his bits and bobs, we found some emails from a work colleague, and i found some sketchy stuff on his mobile

urban

iTrader: (1)

I won't say anything either
But I too can only vote the once

Scoobychick

iTrader: (1)

Many years ago in another life I was seeing a bloke (Dave - not real name ) who had a penchant for ******** his ex girlfriend, albeit unbeknownst to me. Eventually I found out that he was also ******** some bint named Zoe, via his best mate's sister who couldn't bear to see me being deceived. Now obviously I decided to dump him but I also wanted to do it in such a way that he never found out that it was his mate's sister that had grassed him up.

After much thinking and scheming I concocted a plan with the help of my own sister. We knew Zoe went to a particular club on a Friday night so we waited a week and went to the same club in the hope she would be there. Bingo, she was! She didn't know who I was but I knew ALL about her So then we put our cunning plan into action...

The following day I asked Dave (not real name ) to come over which he did. I then told him that me and my sis had been in the loo cubicles at this club (we lied about the loos bit but were actually at the club to make it look genuine) when we'd overheard some girl (Zoe) talking to her mate about him and the relationship they were having. I made up lots and lots of juicy details to make him cringe and make her look like a total cow

He looked shocked, then gutted, then cried when I dumped him Anyway the net result was that: a) He dumped Zoe for carelessly spilling all the intimate beans about their affair in front of his girlfriend (me) and all the things she'd said about his performance to her mate behind his back - despite her protestations that she hadn't and b) he ended up back with ex girlfriend for a while who wore white stilettos (yuk) and was a clingy, needy tramp of a loser who was desperate to have babies - it didn't last!

A couple of years later he bumped into my sister and they spoke for a while. He told her that he was devastated that I'd dumped him as "I was the only woman that he'd ever wanted to be the mother of his children" and that he still missed me. ****. He should've thought of that before

Anyway, the moral of this tale is never mess with a woman - we're evil and will always extract revenge no matter how long it takes

paulr

In my opinion its totally unacceptable, a complete no-no. But hey, its a free country, people do what they want. Not everyone lives by the same standards.

Moley

iTrader: (9)

I have in the past.... but that was an odd relationship anyway.

Haven't cheated on my current girlfriend/fiancee, and never would.

GlesgaKiss

How true is that!

kingofturds

iTrader: (1)

I was cheated on by my gf of 5 years and it was like getting my heart ripped out and stamped on as I loved her dearly. Her excuse it was my fault as I was too trusting and never got jealous.
I had many oppurtunities to cheat in the past, especially in the days of clubbing out newquay. but the thought of losing my gf meant I always came home at the end of the night.
The only thing I regret was a girl who I met shortly after breaking up with my ex, I had been seeing her for a few weeks and we had agreed to meet in a club. She was an hour late an her phone was switched off (my ex used to do that) so I assumed the worse and ended up getting off with some slapper just as her and her friends walked in. I felt like a total scumbag when I saw the look of horror on her face.
Dangers of getting together with someone to soon after a break up I guess.

MJW

I can certainly vouch for that one. My mistress at the time caught me walking home with another girl, mounted the pavement & almost ran me over. Yet bizarrely she didn't have any hangups about my actual girlfriend. I've since mostly given up woman juggling, even though that was the only time I got busted !

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

Excuse the language, but what a F*cking B*tch!!!! It's bad enough she did the dirty, but then compounded the sin by

a) Not having the ***** (sorry, ovaries) to take responsibility
b) And (even worse) laid the blame on your trusting nature (trust, not jealously is the foundation of a good relationship) and thus risked compromising perfectly good future relationships for you.

I wish her a lifetime of men with sexual dysfunction and pubic lice!!!

Lee247

What's public lice

To the OP, no, never have, never would

Trout

iTrader: (1)

I see that the proportion of people cheating is significantly higher than last summers poll on the same subject.

just proves that this country is going down the drain!

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

lol They're like pubic lice, but much bigger, so everyone can see them!

r32

No I havent, its a little like stealing a paper clip from work. Your risking something special for something insignificant.

hodgy0_2

like stealling paper clips? - not if she's got big t1ts and goes at it like rabbit on heat its not

ronjeramy

iTrader: (1)

I've just heard a rumour that another high profile footballer is to be exposed as a love cheat in the press

To the op, nope would never cheat on my other half, when you know you have something good, you keep hold of it. As the old saying goes the grass isn't greener on the other side of the road.

Lee247

ahhh, thanks for clearing that up

Leslie

Right on the nose!

Les

Turbo2

Or maybe some of the previously faithful guys wanted to sample a bit of what they'd been missing out on!

Hysteria1983

What they will be missing out on....? Like regular sex and a loving relationship, above getting it on with someone else just for fear of 'missing out' on something.

I fear for the way some people minds works. Ron hit the nail on the head. The grass is never greener on the other side.
The lawn might look different, and slightly more appealing, but at the end of it all, it's just someone else's lawn.

Leslie

At the end of the day, you still have to live with yourself too!

Les

Trout

iTrader: (1)

The grass is greener...



...where you water it!!!



Cod philosophy of the day!

Trout

iTrader: (1)

So let's add a small variation to the test (for all men and Hysteria )

If you met this girl in a bar,

when you were away from home,

and she gently let you know she would do anything,

for one night only,

and there was now way anyone would ever find out,

would you?



I can pretty much guarantee that of all the naysayers, at least one had the thought run through their head

Hysteria1983

Trout (thanks for including me) I have had the chance once in the past, as I am sure most people have, but I walked away. It was never the of thing that I would even dream of doing.

It was flattering at least to know that I wasn't 'on the shelf' but I am a woman who knows when she has a good thing going on.
I moved away from home to be with Mr. P and I could never think of life without him and our two children.

I see a beautiful man or woman and think/say WOW, he/she is gorgeous, but thats as far as it goes really.

Trout

iTrader: (1)

How could I miss you out - I know we have the same taste in women

I see all the men have going quiet now

rookymatt

iTrader: (15)

Think if it was presented on a plate, most would have two thoughts running through thier heads!
However, i hope most (that are in a loving relationship) would choose the "go home and screw the f**k out of my partner cos i'm obviously horny" route!
Thats my opinion mind you.
Matt