Originally Posted by Hysteria1983

Hi, just got back home so I thought I would get back to you.

I don't think it is a good thing that children are having sex at this age. Also I would never encourage a child to engage in any sexual behaviour.

Hypothetically if I had done nothing to dissuade my daughter to have sex in her early teens, resulting in pregnancy, then I probably wouldn't be bothered. Having done nothing about it in the first place it wouldn't be an issue.

BUT I am not the type of person to do nothing. I talk about sex now with my children. They understand sex in the simple ways that I feel appropriate, and when they get older I will have no issue answering all their questions, and educating them about sex how I see best.

Hopefully that will be enough to help both of them behave in an adult fashion and not go putting it about all over the place unprotected.

As for trying to stop teenagers having sex, there isn't really much you can do as a parent to physically stop them. You cannot lock them up. Yes it is the parents responsibility to teach their children how to understand that sex under the age of 16 is illegal, as well as it is a parents responsibility to teach them about relationships, and how to respect theirs and other peoples body's.

It isn't as simple as telling them not to do it, as we all know that is like waving a red rag at a bull. The more you make something out of reach, the more they want it.
Whats needed is for schools and parents to realize that being more open, honest and factual about sex is what is needed. It needs to be less of a taboo, and more like normal and natural behaviour that is shared between two people that care about each other. Not just a quick fumble where you make sure you wear a johnny so you don't get the clap off a stranger.


With regards to the birth control pill, I am not sure where I stand on this. Personally I wasn't taking it until I was 18, and I didn't need too, because I wasn't having sex. This was despite it being recommended by my gp!
I do think that by allowing underage girls to have the pill without parental consent is in some ways condoning sex, but as far as a gp is concerned they have a job to do, and if they know these girls will be having sex, they have a duty to protect them. The problem there is that the gp isn't around to make sure these girls take the pill when they should, so I do feel in theory this could be doing more harm than good.

But again, nobody can stop this, unless sex is made easier to discuss.

It is terrible for me to think that at an age I was playing kiss chase and off ground tick with boys, that some girls and boys are having sex, but it's happening.

There needs to be a big change, but saying, don't do it it's wrong or immoral simply won't work.

Originally Posted by Leslie

Thanks Hysteria. That is the sort of answer I expected from you. I think you have a very balanced outlook on the matter and I could not criticise what you say.

I do worry about the free birth bill handout though and although as you say you can't order children not to go down that path, I find that very regrettable and I think the authorities show that they have given up on trying to get children to avoid having sex. I see it as an encouragement to do so and it is an error in their thinking. If anything it should be done via the parents so that they also have a say. As ever is is down to a state of mind about the problem and I think that it should be down to the parents to at least try to bring up their children with a sensible and moral attitude. Better to stop pregnancy of course, but far better to avoid the situation in the first place.

Les

Originally Posted by Hysteria1983

The mother is 10 the father is 13.

Originally Posted by Snazy

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-11684854

A 10-year-old girl from Romania has given birth in southern Spain, officials in the region have said.

The girl gave birth to a daughter last week in the city of Jerez de la Frontera, said Andalucia's social affairs minister Micaela Navarro.

Officials are deciding whether the mother and her family can keep custody, Ms Navarro said.

The father of the baby is also believed to be a minor, aged 13, who is still in Romania, Spanish media have said.

"What we have to ensure is that both the mother, who in this case is a minor as well, and the baby are absolutely taken care of," said Ms Navarro.

Originally Posted by Terminator X

I meant your kids : thumb:

TX.

Originally Posted by Hysteria1983

I agree. I am hoping that I can set a good example to my children. I am modern thinking, but also hold traditional values.

I hope that being open and honest like my parents that they won't feel
curious to use google or a poorly informed older brother of a friend. I'm sensible enough to know they will still use google, and magazines, but I want them to understand that what they see and hear isn't always true.

**** is a big issue for me. As an adult I know it's fake and far from 'normal' sexual behaviour. Teenagers are imagining that anything other than being shaved and covered in makeup is abnormal. Talking about profound sexual acts. I have heard my nephew talking to his mates and he, at the age 12 I feel quite disgusted at what he possibly thinks

To think that some of what I watch is regarded as common practice by teenage boys is just awful.

So hopefully I will at least let my children know the reality of it.

Originally Posted by Leslie

I am sure you will manage very well Hysteria. One of the biggest influences on children is the bahaviour of their peers, and that means their parents in particular.

I can imagine what a shock it can be to hear that sort of thing from children. At least you have a head start with your children to get strong basic moral values which will stand them in good stead in the future.

Les