TelBoy

Here's my "claim to fame".

I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome on December 3rd this year, at 45 years old.

I don't just "have" Asperger's, i practically define it. All the clues (including the obsessive postcount) were always there right in front of me, but it took a major event in my life for me to seek professional advice. For me it's been an epiphany (see, over-elaborate vocabulary, a la Asperger's), and hopefully hasn't come too late in life for me to make some real changes in the way i do, and more importantly, say things.

It's obviously very early days, but even in the short time i've had my diagnosis, i've not talked to anybody who would not press the "off" button to rid themselves of Asperger's if they could. It's not just a trendy condition for angsty students, it's a hugely debilitating ailment for those who genuinely have it. In my mind, it's actually fairly different from autism, although there's undoubtedly overlap.

If there's anyone on here who wants to chat privately about it, i'd be happy to do so.

TelBoy

Oh and i didn't do the test because i didn't want to break the damn thing with an off-the-charts score!

AndyC_772

iTrader: (2)

28 here, which is no surprise at all. In fact it's probably an advantage in my line of work (design engineer, electronics).

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

To be utterly frank, I suppose it does explain some idiosyncrasies. I do however struggle to understand how its supposed to detract from one's ability to function out there in the real world. Surely its just a state of mind totally dependant on the individual's personality and lifestyle situation.

(If that made any sense )

Hysteria1983

My son is under assessement for a number of things associated with autism/aspergers.

Personally I am unwilling for him to be labelled with anything at four years of age.

However it would be good to hear some of your experiences.

TelBoy

H1983, i'm not sure whether i'd have been diagnosed Asperger's as young as four. I was precocious as a kid, my ability to do maths was almost scary. I don't have savant skills of any sort whatsoever, but school to me was just too easy.

Unfortunately, secondary school brought me down to earth with a bump. Being all-round capable, and incapable of shutting up about it, loses you friends quicker than wildfire. So i actually had to dumb down so that the bullying relented.

I'm a fabulous collector. I could collect for England. Obsessively so.

I have a hypersensitivity to two noises - sniffing and ticking clocks. If you ever wanted to torture me, just have somebody with a cold bring in a clock, i'd give up immediately.

I have a hypersensitivity to two perfumes - Obsession and Poison. Both make me physically sick, literally.

Perfectionism? Those who know me won't need me to elaborate.

The need to correct error? It's like biting a pillow whenever i see something wrong, especially written prose.

The list is a long and inglorious one.

TelBoy

It does make sense. What it's meant for me is people telling me i'm not very good at some things, which to an Asperger with God Syndrome is pretty hard to take. What i know about empathy you could write on the back of a stamp. What i know about forseeing consequences of my actions, you could write on a pinhead. Learning about those weaknesses and how to compensate for them is all part of what i'm currently going through.

On the bright side, we never lie. We don't have the imaginitive ability. Which in some ways, thinking on my feet here, was what made me SO angry about the Clownwatch thing, when people were hurling accusations at me left right and centre. It just wasn't "logical" - why couldn't they see that too?!! lol Ah well, better at 45 than never at all i suppose.

madscoob

iTrader: (3)

my sons doctor said we all have it in us its just if it shows or not /
heres a question he asked me
IF YOU CAME INTO WORK AND DISCOVERED SOMEONE HAD PUT THIER COAT ON YOU PEG WOULD YOU MOVE IT ? i answered no but he said its astounding the amount of people who would move the coat . we all have traits of it he said perhaps thats why we have so may parking problems people defending thier parking space even thier wheely bins space in some cases

Simon C

Tel, when I met you at the London muppets drinkums, I would never have guessed this at all. You came across as a very well mannered and likable fellow, and please don't take this the wrong way, slightly OCD about a couple of things (high heels being 1 of them)

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

I think your diagnosis explains alot, and I mean absolutely no offence by that.

I must say, good on you for opening up about this and good luck with what you are going through. I know we haven't always seen eye to eye, but I genuinely hope you are able to make those changes in life that you need to, and that you become happier for it.

Hysteria1983

My son has an unhealthy obsession with washing (the process) and washing machines.

I know there are several thousand washing machine related videos on YouTube. He will sit for ages watching them.
He also gets these tick/spasm type things when watching it, or if he watches washing blowing on a washing line.

He is also very unwilling to help or participate in anything that he makes.
He is very creative and is good at sourcing materials to make things/structures. Things that are way above the average skills of a four year old.

His teacher is astounded at this, but at the same time concerned he is still a bit uneasy about interacting with his peers.

TelBoy

We're exceptional actors, Simon. And the later we're diagnosed, the better actors we become. We copy what others do in social situations. But even now (well, up till December 3rd), if there's a social gathering, i'll more than likely be the one at the back, on my own. Chit chat to us is like drinking hemlock. The overbearing noise of pubs and clubs does our heads in. But for short periods of time, we can compensate. After all, nobody wants to be alone. Undiagnosed Aspergers are jusy bloody excellent at repelling people, in the end.

TelBoy

Thanks, Lisa. If i don't change after diagnosis, then i have absolutely nobody else to blame but myself. My Asperger's has cost me dear in 2010, more than you'd ever know. It's my chance to prove that i can learn and adapt, as far as i'm able.

Simon C

Tel, I don't think your alone here. Having read your posts and quite a few others on this thread, there are traits described here that I have in bucketloads, as does my father! I've always been called single minded and determined to the exclusion of other things.

I've always put it down to me being me, and still will. However, there are quite a few other posters here saying the exact same thing about themselves.

TelBoy

H1983, that's definitely more on the autistic end of the spectrum than Asperger's. But it doesn't sound as if it's bad enough to severly limit his development. You're lucky, you have some sense of "something wrong" very early on, that has to be a distinct advantage.

TelBoy

I think B2B made the point earlier, a lot of people do have "some" autistic traits, after all, nobody has posted a zero score on that questionairre. But, without trying to turn it into a badge of honour, being slightly autistic in some respects does not an Asperger make. Autism can being benefits there's no doubt, but you wouldn't want Aspergers. It's ironic, career-wise i'm probably in the top few % in terms of "success", i do a job ideally suited to an Asperger so i've been lucky. But would i now sacrifice everything material i've been able to amass in order to be normal? Yes, in a heartbeat. That's the tragedy of this damn condition.

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

I had some OCD traits at one point, for a couple of years, doing things in certain orders and making myself recheck things, got p1ssed of with it one day and decided not to do any of it and just stopped it, I can see how people get like that and if they have it bad it must be difficult to not do it.

Telboy, at no point have you ever given any suggestion of what you have had to deal with, all the best with it and I hope my somewhat frivolous thread didn't come across as dismissive.

TelBoy

Not at all mate, in fact you saved me the job of starting my own thread to share my woes!!

Hysteria1983

He was already being assessed for other physical issues to do with co ordination, and issues with motor skills, gross and fine. He is doing quite well within his class despite his nature.

His main thing that he gets upset about is change. He likes to sit at a certain side of the table, on 'the red chair' otherwise he gets upset.

TelBoy

Oh i know about resistance to change. I've had just two jobs in over 20 years, the same car for ten years now and unless there's a compelling reason to move, i could be in this house for the rest of my days...

Lee247

Well, that explains a lot. Now I know why you pick up on my punctuation on my FB status

That clownwatch guff, for what it's worth, I never, ever had you in the equation. You have always been forthright and straight with me and it never entered my head you would be two faced. Same goes for Bubba. Having met him on numerous occasions, there is no way on earth he would have had anything to do with it
Hopefully it is now, dead and buried.

Good luck and I sincerely hope it all goes well for you x

madscoob

iTrader: (3)

just a quick question for my own curiosity was your son normal until he had the mmr jab (assuming he did) my dan was ,he was a happy gurgling smiling baby after having it he was withdrawn and went into a world of his own ,he is now 15 and still displays many traits of both autism and aspergers . his writing is still very bad . he also hates change to daily routine . and is very protective of his things .

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

I personally think that this is normal. There is meaningful conversation; For example, a conversation that has a purpose, to arrange, understand, explain or entertain etc. I would find that tolerable. But inane nitter natter that serves absolutely no point nor factual foundation or is complete made up rubbish serving as self glorification as an attempt to appear interesting (often known as "pub talk" or "Talk for talk's sake") I find highly intolerable.

I think there are plenty of people who would hold a similar viewpoint. In fact I'd worry for my sanity if I was told that I'm supposed to tolerate it and join in.

This is one reason why I can't suffer news channels or certain most newspapers. The inaccuracy and talk about nothing annoys the hell out of me, I'm definitely not alone with that opinion.

TelBoy

But Ali, you got a reasonably high score on the questionairre. Of course it seems normal to you!! Coffee up smell wake and the.

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

Yes yes I know, apparently the internet says I'm a nut job (no offence intended). Its an internet based test, so I'm not going to take it too seriously.

I still think I'm right though. How on earth can nitter natter be tolerated? Why is there this social expectation that it is okay to talk utter garbage?

Before its pointed out, maybe I'm guilty of such waffle on SN. However that is usually boredom motivated, I could do it on a Blog, Mémoire, Tweet, Diary etc. But I find tweets/blogs ten times more annoying than a Vicky Pollard type conversation. Honestly, I wouldn't dare do it in real life within earshot of another person, not when sober at least. I learnt from an early age that its better to be thought of as a fool rather than to open my mouth...However, I have been compared to James May in the past (even with a normal haircut), so if he is ever diagnosed, then maybe I should take this a little more seriously.

GlesgaKiss

I got 14.

MMT WRX

16 for me.

There was a huge thread on Pistonheads a few months ago with the same link, I seem to recall scoring 16 then as well.

BTW Good luck TelBoy.

TelBoy

Thank you


Would you have a link to that thread please?

MMT WRX

I will have a search.

Here you go.

http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/t...c%20are%20you?

Fleetwood

The Washing Machine video thing made me laugh. My son is older than yours and has been diagnosed autistic since three years.

Now he can read and write and use the computer on his own I am amazed at how many washing machine and lift videos there are on youtube. I think you have to be bordeline autistic to make videos of lifts or washing machines, which just goes to show how many people around the world are on the spectrum!

We have met many other autistic children and every one is different, my son for instance is quite sociable. I wouldn't worry too much about the label, it is mainly a way to help you get the right educational provision and help your child.

The kids who have the hardest time are the ones whose parents keep rejecting that anything is wrong (which I am absolutely not saying applies to you!).

So much has changed in education and treatment for autism over the last 20 years, there are so many strategies that can help autistic kids such as simple TEACCH schedules that help him/her understand what they are doing during the week/day, or the Pyramid PECS communication system that helps them learn to propoerly interact and get their needs met.

I personally think my child might not necessarily be autistic, it might be something entirely different but the label has helped him get the resources that he has needed and he is happy.