underwear problems
23 July 2011, 01:31 PM
#61
BANNED
Daisy goes up to her Granma and asks
''Grannma, can you show me a magic trick?''
Granma: ''No darling, go and ask your Grandad, I'm sure he has plenty to show you''
Daisy goes to find her Grandad and asks
''Grandad, can you show me a magic trick?''
Grandad: ''Sure love, jump up on to my lap''
Grandad: ''Now Daisy darling, can you feel a finger going up your ***?''
Daisy: ''Yes Grandad!!!!''
Grandad: ''Look, no hands''
''Grannma, can you show me a magic trick?''
Granma: ''No darling, go and ask your Grandad, I'm sure he has plenty to show you''
Daisy goes to find her Grandad and asks
''Grandad, can you show me a magic trick?''
Grandad: ''Sure love, jump up on to my lap''
Grandad: ''Now Daisy darling, can you feel a finger going up your ***?''
Daisy: ''Yes Grandad!!!!''
Grandad: ''Look, no hands''
Last edited by Will; 23 July 2011 at 01:59 PM.
23 July 2011, 04:30 PM
#66
3 blokes are chatting about what they have in their other hand when they're knocking one out.
1st bloke: ''a magazine, as i like to look at a porno when doing it''
2nd bloke: ''a tissue, to catch it in''
3rd bloke: ''a sponge''.
The other 2 ask ''why a sponge''. He replied ''coz i'm normally bathing the kids''
1st bloke: ''a magazine, as i like to look at a porno when doing it''
2nd bloke: ''a tissue, to catch it in''
3rd bloke: ''a sponge''.
The other 2 ask ''why a sponge''. He replied ''coz i'm normally bathing the kids''
23 July 2011, 06:37 PM
#70
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My friends used to call me Mr Lover Lover as I had a great record with the ladies, Then one night a girl with Downs Syndrome asked me **** her up the a*se, now my mates call me Mr Bum Spastic 
23 July 2011, 07:34 PM
#72
Here Goes ......
Fisting - its like trying to get the last Pringle out the tube !
Won a World Record today for holding my breath underwater at the local swimming pool today, 8 mins 40 seconds.
It all started when a four year old girl shouted " that man there daddy".
Whats the difference between a Fanny and a Kebab ?
One has meat hanging out,stinks and you only eat it when your pissed.
The other is a Greek Delicacy.
Fisting - its like trying to get the last Pringle out the tube !
Won a World Record today for holding my breath underwater at the local swimming pool today, 8 mins 40 seconds.
It all started when a four year old girl shouted " that man there daddy".
Whats the difference between a Fanny and a Kebab ?
One has meat hanging out,stinks and you only eat it when your pissed.
The other is a Greek Delicacy.
23 July 2011, 07:46 PM
#73
That should be, technically, to be correct Cerebral Palsy if the joke is to work as that is what "Spastic" was used for, people with "Downs Syndrome" were usually reffered to as "Mongs", not nice but I don't think there is any harm in it, I mean it doesnt mean you actually think that, its a play on words more than anything, its easy to get really PC about jokes.
23 July 2011, 08:03 PM
#74
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That should be, technically, to be correct Cerebral Palsy if the joke is to work as that is what "Spastic" was used for, people with "Downs Syndrome" were usually reffered to as "Mongs", not nice but I don't think there is any harm in it, I mean it doesnt mean you actually think that, its a play on words more than anything, its easy to get really PC about jokes.
23 July 2011, 11:32 PM
#75
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I met a girl in the park last night. We got chatting, and things were going well, so I thought I'd try my luck.
I said, "Simon says take your top off." Off it came.
"Simon says take off your bra." Out came the ****.
After I'd groped them for a while, I said, "Simon says get naked and bend over."
I ****ed her hard up the **** and came inside her. I then pulled up my pants and walked one way, as she ran off the other way, screaming...
It's great having a knife called Simon.
I said, "Simon says take your top off." Off it came.
"Simon says take off your bra." Out came the ****.
After I'd groped them for a while, I said, "Simon says get naked and bend over."
I ****ed her hard up the **** and came inside her. I then pulled up my pants and walked one way, as she ran off the other way, screaming...
It's great having a knife called Simon.
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