pslewis

Ask him what he would do if they came a bit bigger .... remind him that you know and he will face you if it happens again.

That's if you are built like a brick sh1thouse ..... do not try this if you look like Mr Muscles!!

rev.chris

its a hard situation to be in, but he needs to pay for what he's doing, he cant get away with it. he needs to learn a lesson, if you go to the police an they go round there se might say nothing is going on it must of been a prank call, (wont say anything if scared) an he could hurt her more, my advise would be to get a few mates, grab him one night an really scare the crap out of him, i mean really scare him, do what ever it takes.

tarmac terror

iTrader: (2)

If she wants it to stop - pack bags, take son, leave home. Best thing you can offer her here is somewhere to stay until it is resolved.

If he is capable of beating his wife over something like this - he is capable of taking his anger out on her for anything else that winds him up or pisses him off.

awful situation - knocking seven shades out of the bloke will not help the situation.

Brun

^^^^^
Winner!

rev.chris

its not as simple as pack bags an leave for them, some women are to scared to leave, but i really hope she does,

Hysteria1983

I think a visit to your own gp or nurse is the first step. They may know how to help/advise what options she has.

Then you could let your mrs know what the procedures are, and she can gave a word with the woman.
I think if everyone knows what route to take, it might make things easier.
It also might be easier for the rife to deal with if you approach it in a 'he's getting help' kind if way, rather than your husband is a piece of wife beating crap!

Now... I do not for one split second condone his behaviour, but the first step is the wife accepting what's going on and agreeing that something needs to be done, no matter how that is achieved.

We need to think about the whole family here, especially as 'domistic violence' (I hate the term) often manifests itself and continues to effect the rest of the family.

Kuohu

This.

They will have heard this question before.

flame_on

iTrader: (2)

Iain250

iTrader: (1)

just say to him m8 are you cracking her one ? he wont like that question one bit

mrmadcap

Have you been up on her yourself??

pimmo2000

iTrader: (6)

We'll get a thread on here next week ..

I love my misses but I can't argue with her, every time I try to stand up for myself her mate comes round threatening me ..

Dingdongler

He must have always had issues. It's strange that he has suddenly started beating his wife, even though I get that there has been a 'trigger' with the birth of the disabled child.

It still seems strange that an otherwise previously well balanced individual has started to beat on a woman

Leslie

I really don't think I would want to remain friendly with someone of his character.

I think you should consider seriously what is the priority in such a situation. Would you say it is your friendship, or the safety of his wife and child?

Les

EddScott

The whole family needs help - even the husband. He isn't coping and is taking out his frustration of the situation on his wife. Once it starts it becomes very easy for it to become a habit.

They really should spend some time apart. He also need help to come to terms with his life as it is now and either accept it or leave the family home for good.

I'm truly stunned by those posting to threaten the husband or carry out a beating on him - what the hell do you think that would solve? Would that make the situation better? For the children to see both parents black and blue? Sowing the seed of hatred between the husband and wife at the cost of the children? Making an already poor situation much much worse?

There is only so much anyone can do however, if they won't accept help to help themselves (it can be hard as they'll both have blinkers on) then I guess it would just have to be reported to the police.

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

Step one: Do not ignore it - chances are it will escalate
Step two: Refer it to organisations like refuge who are experts in dealing with such matters.

Gear Head

iTrader: (2)

Much better advise than some of the 'headbutting' comments.

kenc

iTrader: (6)

IMO This is far too big an issue for you to take on board, as an individual you cannot have this on your shoulders.
If you say nothing as a result she or kids could end up dead, you say something and as result her and the kids could get killed..
You need to go to the police or someone like this.

mikeywilliams

+1

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

Step 3: try a headbutt

Sorry couldn't resist. Seriously though, it's the last thing that should be done. Macho posturing aside, such intervention usually has the opposite of the desired effect and can end up with tragic consequences for the victim. These cases should always be referred to experts!

Scooby Soon!

ok, I am not of such a low IQ that I think that by going round to there house with my keyboard and hitting him over the head with it in a "warrior" type of way will solve anything or help anyone.

This only started after the disabled child was born, he has never put a finger on the kids and he knows what he is doing to the wife is wrong and he has apologised to the wife (although I have heard most people who hit women do this) I am sure he is suffering from sort of stress related to the birth/child.

I do not want to cut all ties with them as this will only end up with her having less support, I would much rather try to help albeit at a distance as I know directly getting involved will possibly make things worse.

I am going to give refuge a call in the next few days and see if they can point me in the right direction I am also going to get the number of there doctor that visits them every week (who has already offered some sort of counselling because of the disabled child) and see what he says....

Lee247

I deleted my previous post, as it seemed harsh.
Having a disabled child must be really hard, but he can't blame his wife for it. These things happen and there is no explaination for it. It is just, so. No one is to blame.
He needs help, before he does something he really regrets. I do want to smash his face in for being so harsh to his wife, but I am trying to be sensible.
You really need to get professional advice, before it gets out of hand and the whole family is lost. All the best

kenc

iTrader: (6)

Maybe talk to a female police officer and ask her advice on it, they deal with this day in day out,

LC Geezer

Without giving too much away, what policing area are you in i.e. which is your local police force?