Singles
27 March 2012, 10:17 AM
#91
Instructing with fear
iTrader: (31)
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Www.Extreme-rally.co.uk
Posts: 5,101
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like
on
1 Post
The only kids I like are the one's that you can give back when they start crying! At this stage in my life I don't feel the need for a midget keeping me awake at night.
Age:31
Age:31
27 March 2012, 10:28 AM
#92
Scooby Regular
This kind of opinion does make me chuckle i.e. that non-parents live some sort of rich playboy lifestyle. I suppose it can be exaggerated this way when your knee deep in nappies and baby puke most of the time. But all this stuff you describe is the kind of things most people did and chose to do before they had children. Anyone would think we sit here just thinking of new things to do to while away the time in our sad lonely lives and **** all our money up the wall 
These things are all nice but so are the simple things like reading a book, playing a board game with your partner, going for a walk etc. Yes we still socialise with parents whether that be with their children or without them. You can never know 100% how you will feel in the future but I am pretty sure that in 20 years time I wont be looking back feeling sorry for myself. By that time I hope to be retired and with friends whose kids are old enough to have flown the nest so the parents are free to join us on a nice holiday
These things are all nice but so are the simple things like reading a book, playing a board game with your partner, going for a walk etc. Yes we still socialise with parents whether that be with their children or without them. You can never know 100% how you will feel in the future but I am pretty sure that in 20 years time I wont be looking back feeling sorry for myself. By that time I hope to be retired and with friends whose kids are old enough to have flown the nest so the parents are free to join us on a nice holiday
I just felt at 30 it was time to have children, not the easy road by any means, but I do feel the hard yards have been worth it
All my children can finally get in the car and put their seatbelts on – a small thing but any parent will know what a (back) pain that is
and no one has a monopoly on righteousness
27 March 2012, 10:48 AM
#93
Before i got married we decided not to have kids and it was a bit of a condition on my part, having already had two and not wanting to go through it again, and fully understanding the implications of parenthood.
So we went on the holidays had the cars, bikes, boats and bought a holiday home ect, ect.
Then her brother had a child so we incorporated seeing him in new york and my dad in jamaica and a visit to some land we have in florida with a view to selling it into one of our holidays.
what a bloody mistake that was (at the time).
So over protective sister in law new mum, sees my kack handed mrs holding the light of her life and making a bit of a hash of it, which is understandable her never having been around babies before, so good old mr expert baby handler (me) with 5 sisters and having had two of my own, new baby handling is second nature to me, which was what put the nail in my coffin so to speak.
My mrs becomes upset and starts wondering if she would make a good mum and becomes all clucky (fantastic)
So a few months of deliberation follow after which i decided, in for a penny in for a pound, and it would be very selfish of me to deny the person i loved enough to marry and spend the rest of my life with the opportunity to have a child, even though it would have been a deal breaker for me in the begining.
So almost five years on and having a son now, which is something i'd always hoped for since having my first child, i can say without doubt, and god knows i had lots of those, this is the single most best thing i ever did, and even though at 46 i'm older than the average 5yr olds father (even though i don't look it
) i feel i have so much more life experience to pass on and am in a better financial position to have a child than i was the first time around, or at least i was at the time of conception 
All i'm really saying i suppose, is for those that choose not to, and two of my best friends choose not to, never say never.
I have no regrets as i kind of did lots of traveling and my wife spent half her working life traveling the world with horse training and the other half as an off the beaten track tour guide, so its not like we did not see both sides of the coin, and the only thing i would change is selling my motorbikes and buying the sti type r
So we went on the holidays had the cars, bikes, boats and bought a holiday home ect, ect.
Then her brother had a child so we incorporated seeing him in new york and my dad in jamaica and a visit to some land we have in florida with a view to selling it into one of our holidays.
what a bloody mistake that was (at the time).
So over protective sister in law new mum, sees my kack handed mrs holding the light of her life and making a bit of a hash of it, which is understandable her never having been around babies before, so good old mr expert baby handler (me) with 5 sisters and having had two of my own, new baby handling is second nature to me, which was what put the nail in my coffin so to speak.
My mrs becomes upset and starts wondering if she would make a good mum and becomes all clucky (fantastic)
So a few months of deliberation follow after which i decided, in for a penny in for a pound, and it would be very selfish of me to deny the person i loved enough to marry and spend the rest of my life with the opportunity to have a child, even though it would have been a deal breaker for me in the begining.
So almost five years on and having a son now, which is something i'd always hoped for since having my first child, i can say without doubt, and god knows i had lots of those, this is the single most best thing i ever did, and even though at 46 i'm older than the average 5yr olds father (even though i don't look it
) i feel i have so much more life experience to pass on and am in a better financial position to have a child than i was the first time around, or at least i was at the time of conception All i'm really saying i suppose, is for those that choose not to, and two of my best friends choose not to, never say never.
I have no regrets as i kind of did lots of traveling and my wife spent half her working life traveling the world with horse training and the other half as an off the beaten track tour guide, so its not like we did not see both sides of the coin, and the only thing i would change is selling my motorbikes and buying the sti type r
27 March 2012, 03:00 PM
#96
Scooby Regular
weird -- I would say the exact opposite
all the childless couples I know, and I admit it is not that many, bitterly regret not having children.
yes they have more cash etc, but there are only so many impromptu shopping trips to Paris, or last minute ski weekends before it all start to seem a bit pointless
I would go far as to say that (imo) they have a deep sense of sadness about them
But childless couples tend to socialise with childless couple and vica versa
all the childless couples I know, and I admit it is not that many, bitterly regret not having children.
yes they have more cash etc, but there are only so many impromptu shopping trips to Paris, or last minute ski weekends before it all start to seem a bit pointless
I would go far as to say that (imo) they have a deep sense of sadness about them
But childless couples tend to socialise with childless couple and vica versa
As Simon has said, its not about the shopping trips or the holidays. Which, incidentally, would only start to seem a bit pointless if you wanted something more that you couldn't have.
You need to be able to understand that having children is not the ultimate fullfillment for everyone. Somewhat ironically, you are now portraying the very attitude that childless couples (through choice) have to put up with time and time again from those who chose to have children - in that somehow you're missing out. I'm not for one minute saying that being a parent isn't amazing, but its not the be all and end all for everyone.
Our lives are far from "unfulfilled" or "pointless" just because we don't have kids (been married for nearly 16 years). We have zero regrets about that. No sense of sadness here - but then we are childless through choice.
I have no doubts that a couple wanting kids who were medically unable to have them would have a sense of sadness about that.
Most of our friends have kids - kids that we see on a regular basis. Kids that come with them when they come round for dinner, for example. Who's kids are, and always have been, part of what we all do as friends.
We moved away from a lot of our friends a few years ago, and its now not unusual for the older of their children (late teens, early 20's) to come and stay with us for the odd weekend, as they say that although we are older they see us as extended family that they can better relate too. we are, in effect, mum and dads "cool mates" that they can go out with and be themselves with.
It's perhaps becase we don't have kids and are not drawn into a partcular social circle that we have friends who range from 20 years younger than us, to almost 20 years older. From all walks of life and with widely ranging interests. Most of them have children, but the ones that don't are far from unhappy.
27 March 2012, 03:13 PM
#97
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,207
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I have kids and can remember not having any, unfortunately those who have never had kids don't really know what its like.
I never wanted children but the first completely changed my view of the world and what I consider important, I would not change of for the world but if you had asked me before I would never have understood the changes in a perspective that kids can give you.
I never wanted children but the first completely changed my view of the world and what I consider important, I would not change of for the world but if you had asked me before I would never have understood the changes in a perspective that kids can give you.
27 March 2012, 04:15 PM
#98
Scooby Regular
Just a few sweeping generalisations in there lol
As Simon has said, its not about the shopping trips or the holidays. Which, incidentally, would only start to seem a bit pointless if you wanted something more that you couldn't have.
You need to be able to understand that having children is not the ultimate fullfillment for everyone. Somewhat ironically, you are now portraying the very attitude that childless couples (through choice) have to put up with time and time again from those who chose to have children - in that somehow you're missing out. I'm not for one minute saying that being a parent isn't amazing, but its not the be all and end all for everyone.
Our lives are far from "unfulfilled" or "pointless" just because we don't have kids (been married for nearly 16 years). We have zero regrets about that. No sense of sadness here - but then we are childless through choice.
I have no doubts that a couple wanting kids who were medically unable to have them would have a sense of sadness about that.
Most of our friends have kids - kids that we see on a regular basis. Kids that come with them when they come round for dinner, for example. Who's kids are, and always have been, part of what we all do as friends.
We moved away from a lot of our friends a few years ago, and its now not unusual for the older of their children (late teens, early 20's) to come and stay with us for the odd weekend, as they say that although we are older they see us as extended family that they can better relate too. we are, in effect, mum and dads "cool mates" that they can go out with and be themselves with.
It's perhaps becase we don't have kids and are not drawn into a partcular social circle that we have friends who range from 20 years younger than us, to almost 20 years older. From all walks of life and with widely ranging interests. Most of them have children, but the ones that don't are far from unhappy.
As Simon has said, its not about the shopping trips or the holidays. Which, incidentally, would only start to seem a bit pointless if you wanted something more that you couldn't have.
You need to be able to understand that having children is not the ultimate fullfillment for everyone. Somewhat ironically, you are now portraying the very attitude that childless couples (through choice) have to put up with time and time again from those who chose to have children - in that somehow you're missing out. I'm not for one minute saying that being a parent isn't amazing, but its not the be all and end all for everyone.
Our lives are far from "unfulfilled" or "pointless" just because we don't have kids (been married for nearly 16 years). We have zero regrets about that. No sense of sadness here - but then we are childless through choice.
I have no doubts that a couple wanting kids who were medically unable to have them would have a sense of sadness about that.
Most of our friends have kids - kids that we see on a regular basis. Kids that come with them when they come round for dinner, for example. Who's kids are, and always have been, part of what we all do as friends.
We moved away from a lot of our friends a few years ago, and its now not unusual for the older of their children (late teens, early 20's) to come and stay with us for the odd weekend, as they say that although we are older they see us as extended family that they can better relate too. we are, in effect, mum and dads "cool mates" that they can go out with and be themselves with.
It's perhaps becase we don't have kids and are not drawn into a partcular social circle that we have friends who range from 20 years younger than us, to almost 20 years older. From all walks of life and with widely ranging interests. Most of them have children, but the ones that don't are far from unhappy.
and more than happy to accept that "one" generally see things in life from one's own perspective
no real right or wrong
27 March 2012, 06:35 PM
#99
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Feb 1999
Location: Cardiff. Wales
Posts: 11,758
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
27 March 2012, 07:39 PM
#100
Even if you don't, its not like nobody else is, sometimes I would change it, when they are doing my head in, like the last four hours repairing a door they managed to wreck, dicking about, broke the latch so it wouldnt open and I had to force it, hours of filling, about fifty quid in new door furniture, sanding, trying to repair the old latch and it was all the owner of the bedroom could do to help me upstairs with it, seriously its a thankless task sometimes.
You leave some stuff in the fridge and they nail it all and leave the packet in there, no toilet is ever empty of a floater or a skid, clothes everywhere, pots everywhere, the car gets treated like ****, £150 on shopping goes nowhere, I earn a fair whatck but see **** all, I have to driven them everywhere without thanks, kiss your **** or nothing.
I wont say the old cliche "I wouldnt change it for the world", but I don't regret having them most of the time and we get a lie in nowadays, nobody shaking a baby gate shouting "Done Poo" at six am.
If you dont want them, dont have them make a choice an stick to it, if ou change our mine then go for it but dont do it under duress it is YOUR decision, not your cheesy puke smelling, MPV driving, terminally tied, skint friends, they just want you to share the misery. Thats being unfair, sometimes having them is magical but for the most part it is hard work and expense. I feel sorry for those that want them and cant have them and I dont want anyone to get the wrong idea, I feel lucky how things have gone, I see people I know and how their lives have panned out, I am happy but it is possible to be happy, fulfilled and content without kids and perfectly miserable with, it isn't a one size fits all, some people arent maternal/paternal, I have kind of learnt it and feel I have stuff to offer them that some dads dont, advice and stuff, it isnt all playing football and riding bikes in the park,
You leave some stuff in the fridge and they nail it all and leave the packet in there, no toilet is ever empty of a floater or a skid, clothes everywhere, pots everywhere, the car gets treated like ****, £150 on shopping goes nowhere, I earn a fair whatck but see **** all, I have to driven them everywhere without thanks, kiss your **** or nothing.
I wont say the old cliche "I wouldnt change it for the world", but I don't regret having them most of the time and we get a lie in nowadays, nobody shaking a baby gate shouting "Done Poo" at six am.
If you dont want them, dont have them make a choice an stick to it, if ou change our mine then go for it but dont do it under duress it is YOUR decision, not your cheesy puke smelling, MPV driving, terminally tied, skint friends, they just want you to share the misery. Thats being unfair, sometimes having them is magical but for the most part it is hard work and expense. I feel sorry for those that want them and cant have them and I dont want anyone to get the wrong idea, I feel lucky how things have gone, I see people I know and how their lives have panned out, I am happy but it is possible to be happy, fulfilled and content without kids and perfectly miserable with, it isn't a one size fits all, some people arent maternal/paternal, I have kind of learnt it and feel I have stuff to offer them that some dads dont, advice and stuff, it isnt all playing football and riding bikes in the park,
27 March 2012, 08:02 PM
#101
Scooby Regular
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Here, There, Everywhere
Posts: 10,619
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Yes, it's sad at the end of the day that a girl you really like ends a relationship with you because you don't want to start a family with her. But I wouldn't have a child `just` to please another person.
I have friends who have children. I have a girlfriend that has children. Other than their children, I can't be done with any others. They annoy me in Supermarkets crying for sweets. The annoy me in pubs running around and shouting everywhere. I was over the lakes at the weekend, and witnessed some bloke trying to stop his young son having an almighty tantrum in the middle of the street. Not for me thanks.
Do I get on with children? Funnily enough, yes. My friends children like me, and are always pleased to see me. My girlfriends children like me. And TBH, I'd probably make a really good dad, as i try to teach them right from wrong. Make sure they say please and thank you, and to be polite to people. I help them with homework if they're stuck.
But, at the end of the day, I'm not tied to them. I don't have to hang around when they're naughty, or fighting on with each other. I'm not there to buy them clothes, make-up, or any of the other things that cost money when kids are involved (although I do buy them things and take them on day outs). I don't live with them, so I can go back to my flat and get peace and quite when ever i want.
Just because someone chooses not to have children, doesn't mean they'll be lonely in later life, or somehow there life is worthless once you take away the nice house/car etc. How many 70 year olds who've had children are lonely because their children don't want to know them, or have moved away? Probably quite a few.
The people on here saying that none parents don't know what they're missing out on. It's the best feeling in the world.
Ask a Heroin addict what they think of Heroin, and they'll tell you the same thing.
I don't want to try that either.
27 March 2012, 08:19 PM
#102
Scooby Regular
27 March 2012, 08:30 PM
#103
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Some country and western
Posts: 13,488
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Those that don't want kids, were you raised in a happy, stable household with parents that stayed together?
I don't expect anyone to admit otherwise i guess, but i am interested.
It seems only natural to me as I was bought up in a happy stable household, that I would want to do the same.....and it's took some bloody doing!
I don't expect anyone to admit otherwise i guess, but i am interested.
It seems only natural to me as I was bought up in a happy stable household, that I would want to do the same.....and it's took some bloody doing!
27 March 2012, 08:49 PM
#105
Scooby Regular
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Here, There, Everywhere
Posts: 10,619
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Those that don't want kids, were you raised in a happy, stable household with parents that stayed together?
I don't expect anyone to admit otherwise i guess, but i am interested.
It seems only natural to me as I was bought up in a happy stable household, that I would want to do the same.....and it's took some bloody doing!
I don't expect anyone to admit otherwise i guess, but i am interested.
It seems only natural to me as I was bought up in a happy stable household, that I would want to do the same.....and it's took some bloody doing!
We never got anything and everything we wanted. Thats what Christmas and Birthdays were for. Not like kids today that seem to get everything all year round.
So yes. Brought up in a good family.
How you're brought up doesn't affect if you want children or not. Most people brought up in rough area's with little or no money, and who's parent/parents are not what you'd call `salt of the earth` are probably those who start breading first.
27 March 2012, 09:14 PM
#107
Scooby Regular
iTrader: (2)
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Swilling coffee at my lab bench
Posts: 9,096
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
In fact, that seems like a bit of an odd question to ask. Can there really be no other justification for not wanting children?
People say it changes their lives, but I've worked hard to get my life the way it is, and I don't actually want it changing. I rather like it the way it is.
27 March 2012, 10:07 PM
#108
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: riding the crest of a wave ...
Posts: 46,493
Likes: 0
Received 13 Likes
on
12 Posts
ha Well im 46 and now have the income/cash to get on with it
unfortunately the girlfriend of 5 years is also close on the same age , has a daughter , 27, and numerous nephews and nieces ( actually its 1 niece )
Workmate from a while back said once you reach forty those feelings for being a father drop away , im not so sure
unfortunately the girlfriend of 5 years is also close on the same age , has a daughter , 27, and numerous nephews and nieces ( actually its 1 niece )
Workmate from a while back said once you reach forty those feelings for being a father drop away , im not so sure
Last edited by dpb; 27 March 2012 at 10:14 PM.
27 March 2012, 10:14 PM
#109
Lol, this is a very interesting thread, if a person doesn't want to have kids then they really should not, kids really do change your life and i think far too many people don't realise just what is involved, and don't consider how much it costs in money and lifestyle.
I think that it's just not for some people, and thats fine in my book, and to be honest i do see the point of view of those that don't want them as perfectly reasonable, and i also dislike people that force their poorly behaved child upon the rest of the world.
I think that it's just not for some people, and thats fine in my book, and to be honest i do see the point of view of those that don't want them as perfectly reasonable, and i also dislike people that force their poorly behaved child upon the rest of the world.
27 March 2012, 10:28 PM
#110
Scooby Regular
We had friends like that. Don't see them anymore for that very reason. I also know people that think we can't have kids rather than accepting we've chosen not to.
Dingledonger, I think what Beef is getting at is parents who think thy have some God given right to expect you to put up with their kids and their crap irrespective of how much of an imposition that is. Personally I don't want someones snotty nosed child running around in my face if I'm out for a meal simply because the parents want some peace or are so selfish or blinded to the fact that not everyone adores said child as they do. The worst for me is kids screaming or generally being disruptive and the parents just ignore it and carry on regardless, rather than dealing with the issue at hand. Now I know not all parents are like that, but it seems more and more are.
It's about balance. Reasonable childless people will understand that it's not always easy for those that do have kids, but those that do need to understand that those without should not just be expected to put up with a whole host of crap just because they do.
Dingledonger, I think what Beef is getting at is parents who think thy have some God given right to expect you to put up with their kids and their crap irrespective of how much of an imposition that is. Personally I don't want someones snotty nosed child running around in my face if I'm out for a meal simply because the parents want some peace or are so selfish or blinded to the fact that not everyone adores said child as they do. The worst for me is kids screaming or generally being disruptive and the parents just ignore it and carry on regardless, rather than dealing with the issue at hand. Now I know not all parents are like that, but it seems more and more are.
It's about balance. Reasonable childless people will understand that it's not always easy for those that do have kids, but those that do need to understand that those without should not just be expected to put up with a whole host of crap just because they do.
DD, but that is NOT what he is saying is it? I wouldn't expect you to be hassled by my kids. But Beef is annoyed that a small child might suffer ear pain on take off and landing and so cry. He has said exactly that.
It's a disgusting and selfish attitude mate
27 March 2012, 10:34 PM
#111
Scooby Regular
So now us non-parents should be extra grateful to those who have made the sacrifice for the rest of us and raised children to fill these important roles? As if that is even a reason why anyone decides to have a child, its more a consequence. With the best will in the world you have very little control over what career they end up doing let alone if they stay on the straight & narrow. They could as easily go down the wrong paths in life and be a dole dependant layabout. Yes if everyone decided no then eventually human life could peter out but let’s face it we are at the complete opposite end of that spectrum currently with gross overpopulation causing havoc to the planet and not enough jobs to go around.
Well that just shows how little you know about raising children mate. Though I can't guarantee what my children will do and achieve you can bet your bottom dollar that I'll be dedicating a huge chunk of my time, energy and money to try and make them useful members of society.
And actually parents do have quite a bit of control over how their children turn out.
27 March 2012, 10:38 PM
#112
Scooby Regular
Those that don't want kids, were you raised in a happy, stable household with parents that stayed together?
I don't expect anyone to admit otherwise i guess, but i am interested.
It seems only natural to me as I was bought up in a happy stable household, that I would want to do the same.....and it's took some bloody doing!
I don't expect anyone to admit otherwise i guess, but i am interested.
It seems only natural to me as I was bought up in a happy stable household, that I would want to do the same.....and it's took some bloody doing!
my older brother has no children (he is happily married) and as far as I can tell (i do not speak to him) does not want any
he is an utter **** though
My younger sister, again no children (no relationship), but she did have a very tricky relationship with our mother (and actually states that as a reason)
two younger brothers loads, 5 between them, and with me makes 10
Last edited by hodgy0_2; 27 March 2012 at 10:43 PM. Reason: wow, what sh1te spelling
27 March 2012, 10:56 PM
#114
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Sheffield
Posts: 68
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I only have the one kid, and it has limited how much disposable income we have and also how much free time we get. But it's a simple case of the grass being greener. I think every parent wishes for the single life at some stage, but i can honestly say if I was faced with the choice of being single or my family, my family would win it every time
27 March 2012, 10:57 PM
#115
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,207
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I love that you compare herion to having children. Good analogy..... or not .
27 March 2012, 11:24 PM
#116
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 48,539
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
ha Well im 46 and now have the income/cash to get on with it
unfortunately the girlfriend of 5 years is also close on the same age , has a daughter , 27, and numerous nephews and nieces ( actually its 1 niece )
Workmate from a while back said once you reach forty those feelings for being a father drop away , im not so sure
unfortunately the girlfriend of 5 years is also close on the same age , has a daughter , 27, and numerous nephews and nieces ( actually its 1 niece )
Workmate from a while back said once you reach forty those feelings for being a father drop away , im not so sure
Dunno about this feeling dropping business at your older age, mate. A friend of mine got broody at 48, and had his 2nd child (now nearly 2) with his current GF (46), when his first one from his previous GF was about 17, then.
Another friend of mine (45) had a healthy baby about 3 years ago with her husband who was 46, then. She already had 2 teenage kids, so did he, from his previous marriage. It really depends upon if you both want to have a child. If you do, then you will face up to the stuff like extra tests during pregnancy for baby's welfare, and being ancient
when he/she is kicking football around or wanting father as an energetic cycling mate etc.
28 March 2012, 12:30 AM
#117
Scooby Regular
Can't afford a kid because it would seem me and the missus are paying for half the streets kids.
Honestly though, no intention to have them as I don't like children. The only thing I dislike more than children is new parents as they get on like arseholes. Worse still is parents who refer to their offspring as the CHILD!
Honestly though, no intention to have them as I don't like children. The only thing I dislike more than children is new parents as they get on like arseholes. Worse still is parents who refer to their offspring as the CHILD!
28 March 2012, 07:16 AM
#118
Of course it does, all the factors from your life influence your personality.
I don't like children, wouldn't spend time with anyone else's unless I'm forced. I do like my own kids though, different thing completely.
I do think about life without children, nicer house, cars etc and it is appealing, but (as said above) I have fond memories of my childhood and I really wanted to do the same for my kids. When your young things like getting presents and waiting for dad to come home is very exciting, but as a parent being able to give someone else that much happiness, for what are the most basic things is an awesome feeling.
As I type my 1 year old daughter is standing watching me, I look up and the biggest smile appears on her face and it's just make everything worth it.
Can't afford a kid because it would seem me and the missus are paying for half the streets kids.
Honestly though, no intention to have them as I don't like children. The only thing I dislike more than children is new parents as they get on like arseholes. Worse still is parents who refer to their offspring as the CHILD!
Honestly though, no intention to have them as I don't like children. The only thing I dislike more than children is new parents as they get on like arseholes. Worse still is parents who refer to their offspring as the CHILD!
I do think about life without children, nicer house, cars etc and it is appealing, but (as said above) I have fond memories of my childhood and I really wanted to do the same for my kids. When your young things like getting presents and waiting for dad to come home is very exciting, but as a parent being able to give someone else that much happiness, for what are the most basic things is an awesome feeling.
As I type my 1 year old daughter is standing watching me, I look up and the biggest smile appears on her face and it's just make everything worth it.
28 March 2012, 07:28 AM
#119
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Apr 2000
Posts: 1,054
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
It's not the noise of the unhappy child that bothers me in that situation (like I say, these days I'm usually in a different class anyway), it's just an example of the selfishness some parents can display: "Oh, I don't care if my baby is upset or causing a disturbance and preventing people sleeping on this 10-hour red-eye, I want to go to blah blah". It's wanting to have their cake and eat it.But actually, Devildog has got it exactly spot-on as to my issue:
parents who think thy have some God given right to expect you to put up with their kids and their crap irrespective of how much of an imposition that is
28 March 2012, 07:57 AM
#120
Scooby Regular
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,278
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Even if you don't, its not like nobody else is, sometimes I would change it, when they are doing my head in, like the last four hours repairing a door they managed to wreck, dicking about, broke the latch so it wouldnt open and I had to force it, hours of filling, about fifty quid in new door furniture, sanding, trying to repair the old latch and it was all the owner of the bedroom could do to help me upstairs with it, seriously its a thankless task sometimes.
You leave some stuff in the fridge and they nail it all and leave the packet in there, no toilet is ever empty of a floater or a skid, clothes everywhere, pots everywhere, the car gets treated like ****, £150 on shopping goes nowhere, I earn a fair whatck but see **** all, I have to driven them everywhere without thanks, kiss your **** or nothing.
I wont say the old cliche "I wouldnt change it for the world", but I don't regret having them most of the time and we get a lie in nowadays, nobody shaking a baby gate shouting "Done Poo" at six am.
If you dont want them, dont have them make a choice an stick to it, if ou change our mine then go for it but dont do it under duress it is YOUR decision, not your cheesy puke smelling, MPV driving, terminally tied, skint friends, they just want you to share the misery. Thats being unfair, sometimes having them is magical but for the most part it is hard work and expense. I feel sorry for those that want them and cant have them and I dont want anyone to get the wrong idea, I feel lucky how things have gone, I see people I know and how their lives have panned out, I am happy but it is possible to be happy, fulfilled and content without kids and perfectly miserable with, it isn't a one size fits all, some people arent maternal/paternal, I have kind of learnt it and feel I have stuff to offer them that some dads dont, advice and stuff, it isnt all playing football and riding bikes in the park,
You leave some stuff in the fridge and they nail it all and leave the packet in there, no toilet is ever empty of a floater or a skid, clothes everywhere, pots everywhere, the car gets treated like ****, £150 on shopping goes nowhere, I earn a fair whatck but see **** all, I have to driven them everywhere without thanks, kiss your **** or nothing.
I wont say the old cliche "I wouldnt change it for the world", but I don't regret having them most of the time and we get a lie in nowadays, nobody shaking a baby gate shouting "Done Poo" at six am.
If you dont want them, dont have them make a choice an stick to it, if ou change our mine then go for it but dont do it under duress it is YOUR decision, not your cheesy puke smelling, MPV driving, terminally tied, skint friends, they just want you to share the misery. Thats being unfair, sometimes having them is magical but for the most part it is hard work and expense. I feel sorry for those that want them and cant have them and I dont want anyone to get the wrong idea, I feel lucky how things have gone, I see people I know and how their lives have panned out, I am happy but it is possible to be happy, fulfilled and content without kids and perfectly miserable with, it isn't a one size fits all, some people arent maternal/paternal, I have kind of learnt it and feel I have stuff to offer them that some dads dont, advice and stuff, it isnt all playing football and riding bikes in the park,
You're just about ready for Grand kids.
Don't get used to spending any of that spare cash just yet. 