The_Lizard

WASHINGTON, DC - In a surprise development, United States Vice President Richard Cheney was seen today, appearing on the floor of the United States Senate. Cheney appeared to be blinking at the daylight and brushing off mushrooms that have been growing on his back. His presence was in full view of the complete Senate. Administration officials offered no explanation why Cheney would present himself in the Capitol in Washington, believed to be a terrorist target.

Maverick Senator John McCain was quoted as saying, "He smelled like a storage area."

Cheney's whereabouts have been a well-kept secret since the attacks of September 11. It is widely believed that he has been in the underground facility built to shelter a "shadow government" which would survive any attack on Washington. Some have speculated that, due to the risks of his heart condition, he is kept frozen and only thawed when his presence is required. This theory is bolstered by the apparent cryogenic torpor displayed by Al Gore during his term as vice persident.

Security around Cheney is kept tight even though no United States vice president has ever been impeached or asassinated. Polls indicate that most Americans would not even recognize him if they saw him on the street. Some beleive this security originates in concerns arising from the "Shoot Quayle First" t-shirts sold during the first Bush administration.

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