Help Me Please
14 April 2008, 10:01 PM
#1
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Help Me Please
Come on guys and girls, I need everyone to concentrate hard and "will" my darling other half Kelly to go into labour. She is due to give birth to our baby son on Wednesday. She has been getting lots of proper pains for four days now and I can't take any more of it. I just want him out.
Help me Please.
Help me Please.
14 April 2008, 10:15 PM
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Come on guys and girls, I need everyone to concentrate hard and "will" my darling other half Kelly to go into labour. She is due to give birth to our baby son on Wednesday. She has been getting lots of proper pains for four days now and I can't take any more of it. I just want him out.
Help me Please.
Help me Please.
15 April 2008, 12:06 AM
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15 April 2008, 02:09 AM
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Nice big bowl of Strawberrys is also another way, gentle walks and one of those big blow up ***** are good to sit on and gently bounce it can take the pressure off and ease the pain.
Hope all goes well Kelly when the time does come .
Jim he'll come when his ready his just keeping you on your toes lol.
Hope all goes well Kelly when the time does come .
Jim he'll come when his ready his just keeping you on your toes lol.
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15 April 2008, 09:47 AM
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My sister drank a glass of Cod Liver oil and within two hours she gave birth!!! It tastes foul, and can make you sick, but hey....desprate times and all that.
Sex as well brings on labour.... not being crude but its true!!
Sex as well brings on labour.... not being crude but its true!!
15 April 2008, 09:52 AM
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Yep - sex does it! I was told by a midwife (and pelase excuse the crudness here) that a mans seman acts the same as the gel they use to induce you - it starts to open the cervix and can begin labour - also sex does agitate the cervix.
So start getting jiggy with it - if you can bear it
So start getting jiggy with it - if you can bear it
15 April 2008, 12:32 PM
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Right so thats a nice walk followed by a hot curry, some strawberries for afters, a hot bath - so someone said and then a good sh#g, well getting jiggy with it!!! She's gonna be too ******* knackered to give birth after all that.
I'll let you all know if it works.
I'll let you all know if it works.
15 April 2008, 12:39 PM
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Personally (I did it myself) - I'd go for the jiggyness first, followed by a nice warm bath and then if nothing else happens - go for a walk up and down the stairs - gravity plays a VERY important part in childbirth!!!!
15 April 2008, 12:39 PM
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Last edited by Supercue; 15 April 2008 at 12:51 PM.
15 April 2008, 12:42 PM
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PMSL
16 April 2008, 02:24 PM
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Right people, all that didn't work. I was stuffed from the curry, couldn't find any strawberries and after a logistical operation to match the channel tunnel build, trying to "get jiggy", it looked more like a David Attenborough documentary on hippos in the mating season.
AND STILL NOTHING.
AND STILL NOTHING.
16 April 2008, 02:25 PM
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Right people, all that didn't work. I was stuffed from the curry, couldn't find any strawberries and after a logistical operation to match the channel tunnel build, trying to "get jiggy", it looked more like a David Attenborough documentary on hippos in the mating season.
AND STILL NOTHING.
AND STILL NOTHING.
PMSL I am so going to tell her you said that
16 April 2008, 02:32 PM
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If I knew how to do it, and I could find a picture of it, I would post a picture of a big fat steaming pile of Bulls**t. 
But I cant and I don't.
But I cant and I don't.
16 April 2008, 02:36 PM
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