Help me I'm stuck in my house with Zoe's relatives!
14 December 2002, 06:42 PM
#1
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Zoe's sister, sister's bloke and 4yr old son are at our house. It's a nighmare. The little lad is into everything. Running round and round the cinema room. In my absence he has pressed everysingle button on the amp and has just been sick on the carpet. Sisters bloke is sat in my chair, watching my sky and drinking my Stella. Sister (Tammy) just tries to be sarcastic all the time. Help me.........please help me. I'm locked away in my office now, tripped over several feet of train track to get here. I have allready "been-to-work" in the scoob for an hour but have run out of ideas.
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14 December 2002, 07:45 PM
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Just been downstairs to see whats going on. Came back upstairs and they were all on my pc! Prised them off, they've gone back downstairs now. I wish they would just **** off 
Is that allowed? 
14 December 2002, 08:50 PM
#12
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so you went down stairs....and they went up stair..what???via the staffs stair case???? the other side of the house?? lol...thats why you didn't know they had nipped upstairs. lol
just wait till Christmas day you'll have it all again.
can't you let the nanny look after the kid?
Phil
just wait till Christmas day you'll have it all again.
can't you let the nanny look after the kid?
Phil
15 December 2002, 11:52 AM
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Get a mate (acting as a copper) to phone them up and tell them their house has been burgled and its been left unsecured and in a right mess 
That should do the trick Should result in peace and quiet in the comfort of your own chair
Nath
PS: My first corner
[Edited by 47 NAT - 12/15/2002 11:55:45 AM]
That should do the trick Should result in peace and quiet in the comfort of your own chair Nath
PS: My first corner
[Edited by 47 NAT - 12/15/2002 11:55:45 AM]
15 December 2002, 04:58 PM
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Tell them that you are part of a wife swapping club in your street and the next meeting is tonight - in your front room!!!!
Tell them to get their car keys out - and put a big bowl in the middle of the coffee table - just to get ready. Then ask if the kid can be looked after for a couple of hours as you will need to access all the bedrooms - and you wouldn't want it to see what was going on!
Trout
PS Either it will get rid of them - or you get to enjoy a huge orgy and that pierced tongue
Tell them to get their car keys out - and put a big bowl in the middle of the coffee table - just to get ready. Then ask if the kid can be looked after for a couple of hours as you will need to access all the bedrooms - and you wouldn't want it to see what was going on!
Trout
PS Either it will get rid of them - or you get to enjoy a huge orgy and that pierced tongue
15 December 2002, 08:35 PM
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Thanks for the help guys. Got woken up this morning by Zoe in a bad mood. Apparently I had nicked all the duvet. Went down stairs to find the little guy sat watching tv after spilling water all over the floor. He asked if he could have some breakfast so I git him a bowl of cornflakes. About an hour later its mother appeared and chastised me for feeding her child when he has a bad stomach!
She then proceeded to crash about in the kitchen making breakfst for herself and bloke. I slipped quietly away to the garage and made a stealthy exit in the Scoob. Well as stealthy as you can be with a full decat zorst. Speant the rest of the day with friends blasting round the twisties in the lake district. Came home at about eight. The house is very quite.......they have all gone! Zoe wouldn't speak to me, well only enough to let me know that she is going to the gym. Then the door slammed and she was away.
Think I might stop at a mates house to night.
She then proceeded to crash about in the kitchen making breakfst for herself and bloke. I slipped quietly away to the garage and made a stealthy exit in the Scoob. Well as stealthy as you can be with a full decat zorst. Speant the rest of the day with friends blasting round the twisties in the lake district. Came home at about eight. The house is very quite.......they have all gone! Zoe wouldn't speak to me, well only enough to let me know that she is going to the gym. Then the door slammed and she was away.
Think I might stop at a mates house to night.
16 December 2002, 10:15 AM
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C H A Z
Zoe clearly doesn't understand you, your views or your take on life, so its never going to work out long term.
Ditch her now, and then you won't have to worry about the sister, the sister's bloke or brat coming round again
D
Zoe clearly doesn't understand you, your views or your take on life, so its never going to work out long term.
Ditch her now, and then you won't have to worry about the sister, the sister's bloke or brat coming round again
D