Drunken Bungle Whore

OK - 5 things to consign to the room and why - and try and avoid the obvious - i.e. 'People who drive like w@nkers' etc!

1. Coat-hangers. Can't even spell it correctly. They truly are the work of Satan. Go on - try and pick just one of them up out of a pile....
2. 'Special Hotel Rates' Bollox!! Just means - "we're charging your company less, so we're going to put you in the really sh1tty room!"
3. Yoghurt pots. Primed with explosives. Oh they look innocent enough, but just loose concentration for one second when you're opening one and you'll be smelling of Strawberry Surprise for the rest of the day!
4. Internet search engines. Used to be fine - but now there is so much advertsing it takes ages to find what you're looking for. I especially loathe those results that pop up making no sense whatsoever! "You searched for w@nking slugs, click here to find w@nking slug designs on T Towels and Nappies." Aaaarrrrgggghhhhhhh
5. Erasers in propelling pencils. I have a nice Parker propelling pencil with daisies on (what else). I use it for my work diary so there are lots of rubbings out and I need a new eraser. Are they all a standard size? No, of course not, how bloody obvious would that be? Have I found one yet? No - cos I can't make sense of the internet search engine....

It's just one of those days! On the bright side - they're about the only things that do make me mad!

JackClark

People who pay to put sponsor stickers on their cars! Especially ones that advertise ****!!

lightning101

Formula 1 ?

Patt@firstime

Agree with coat-hangers

Abdabz

1/ Leaflets pushed through the letterbox to do with clothing collections...grrrr they're my clothes and if I dont wear them down the pub anymore I'll keep them for decorating now fork off!!!!

2/ Reality TV production companies.... How sad must someones life be to sit there watching others doing what they do....Are their own lives not interesting enough? Then they spend money voting for/against them!!! Oh sweet jesus...All production companies responsible for this tripe should be tarred, feathered and THEN put in room 101.

3/ Digital Watches - oooo noooooooooooooo...a serious faux par...Sort ya life oooot!

4/ Cabbage on Donner Kebabs - tooo much.... leave it it just makes the following mornings trumps musty as well as burny!!

5/ People who get caught speeding and come on SN asking how to get away with it...
Just coz ya cant drive in a straight line and observe the speed limits at the same time doesnt mean you have a right to contest...Where are your tats? Take it like an Englishmen... Stiff upper lip and get on with it you tarts!! Get in room 101....

Scoobychick

iTrader: (1)

Ooh good excuse to have a rant

1. The Post Office. All Post Offices. Everywhere.
2. Cat & dog owners who allow their pets to crap anywhere and everywhere. I pick up my dog's mess, why can't they?
3. TV channels who broadcast the adverts at twice the sound of the programmes they rudely interupt and following nicely on...
4. Ringtone ads
5. Morrisons supermarkets.

Am I only allowed five? I've only just started warming up

Reality

1. a Toe - then when I'm cutting my nails I'll know that 9 nails is all I need to look for.

2. Windows Dialogue Boxes that ask you Questions that are ******* obvious then do something else like "Do you want to save your last 4 hours work?" followed by "There's been a problem saving your data - ReBooting - Have a nice day"

3. Tony Blair - He bans too many things that other people enjoy

4. Tossers in the bogs asking you if you want some "toiletries"

5. Instructions that say thing like "Easy Cook" or "Easy to Un-Pack" with drawing that would confuse Einstien (Usually found in the bottom of Ikea Flat Packs). These are clearly the work of satan to allow your wife to call you stupid when the bookshelf looks like it's been in an earthquake.

lawson101

1) Kids that play football in carparks where there are no ball game signs and a football pitch 5 mins walk away. ffs play footy on a pitch and away from peoples cars.

2) People who feel the need to mutter to themselves when working. Dont do it its annoying, Im forever thinking their talking to me.

3) People who finish off the last word of your sentence when your talking to them. Im talking, you should listen......quietly!!

4) Pop-up/Pop-under internet advertising. Its just annoying, theres a time and a place for advertising and its not everytime I click another link on a website.

5) Platic bags with holes in the bottom. I want to use these for holding rubbish, but wait I cant cos its perforated to stop kiddies and animals from suffocating in them!!

davegtt

1. Ringtone ads has got to be in there

2. Traffic lights that stay on green enough time to only get 2 cars through

3. Scoobychicks 3. adverts twice as loud as the program.... Soooo annoying, u turn the telly down then when your program comes on you cant hear it

4. People over 80 who are still driving

5. Christmas, not the holiday time just the actual christmas day.... costs bl00dy fortune for everybody, to celebrate what exactly?

Iwan

That sounds like a nice place, do they have an immigration website?

1. Labour party, and their poor misguided drones/followers.
2. Trade Unions.
3. Any ringtone other than silent vibrate or 'ring ring', but especially the whistling one.
4. People who come round knocking on my door in the evenings who aren't my friends.
5. People in my office who use speakerphones, talk at 10x normal volume on the phone, tap the side of my cube wall as they walk past, or have cockney/essex/kent accents.

Drunken Bungle Whore

Only jolly nice - everso slightly wierd - people are allowed in!

kend

1) Speed bumps

2) Speed bumps

3) Did I mention speed bumps.

I drive to a fair number of RTAs, often at fairly high speed - until I get to the road with the speed bumps. Blue flashing lights, sirens, and 20mph over the bumps. I'm sure if you live in an area with lots of them, you are more likely to die waiting for an ambulance when you have your 1st heart attack.

scoobyvirgin

1: People who queue jump at the bar.

2: People who moan they weren't served in turn at the bar, who haven't made up their mind what they want anyway and then have to go and ask all their friends what they want, slowing service down for everyone else.

3: Beer costing more the Optimax per litre

4: Old codgers who drink flat pints of bitter who insist that their drink is topped up (trying to get 1.5 pints into a pint glass why?) therefore slowing down service. (They normally moan they weren't served in turn, which I suspect they were not as the staff avoid them as they don't want to get moaned at for only getting 1.75 pints into a pint glass )

5: Fosters drinkers - why not just drink Tesco Value lager?

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

1) Ice cream lollies e.g. Cornetto, Magnum. Price goes up and up yet I'm fairly convinced they're getting smaller!

2) People who ask if my Scooby has a dump valve/turbo/nitrous

3) People who spit on the floor. Swallow it, or get to the toilet first!! No jokes about me telling the G/F to do the same please, I've already thought of them!

4) Bed and Breakfast showers with two temperature settings: Hypothermia and Burns unit

5) Baby on board stickers: 1) If I get close enough to read it, I'm not allowing sufficient time to stop, so it's completely pointless and may cause rather than prevent an accident 2) Do you really think people exercise discretion over who they rear end based on the occupants of a car as advertised such a sticker!!!! If so, would anyone mind producing a sticker that says:

"Please tailgate: rear occupants have given up on life anyway"!

OR

"DSS loosers in back of car.....go on, stack it and save the state some money!!"

NS04

Apparition

1. The fact that I live in the Anglia area yet I can't get Anglia news, I have to suffer the doings of North Yorks et al.
2. Dawdlers who insist on travelling at 5mph below the prescribed limit. On ANY road.
3. Blokes who work in suits and think they are above all others.
4. Ageism.
5. Ricky Gervais, unfunniest man in creation and what a stupid name !
Yve

JackClark

I think you'd find they get paid.

lucylastic

1. Picallili - I have no idea what it is, and absolutely no desire to find out - nothing that revolting can be edible

2. People that go to the "10 items or less" queue at the supermarket, but have more than 10 items (it irritates me so much, I count everyone's basket )

3. People that moan about Call Centres being modern-day sweatshops - they're not, we have air conditioning in all of ours

4. People that tell me my car has a wankel and snigger incessantly about it

5. Sales in clothes shops - aka a rugby match at a jumble sale

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

*sniggers*

Tee hee, she said wankel!!

Sorry, I'll get my coat!

NS04

lucylastic

Reality

*sniggers a bit longer*

unclebuck

1 to 5 inclusive.

BLAIR!!

Reality

Fair chance I'll regret this

WHY ?

(First 2,000 reasons only)

angrynorth

1. Companies that advertise job vacancies without showing how much they are paying. What makes you so special I should waste my time and money applying for some thing that might not pay enough?

2. JCL Chelsea fans, get over yourselves,

3. Interfcukingnet Exfckuingplorer - why oh why can't the worlds richest company develop a browser that confirms to standards and guidelines. IE is single handedly delaying web-design and development by at least 4 years. Tossers.

4. The BBC, you are self sufficient now and don't need the license fee. If you want to keep the fee then stop selling and profiting from selling us DVD's and cut the adverts off UKTV. At the very least you could let students off the license fee. Also if you stopped spunking your budgets on high salaries and low quality you wouldn't need so much from the fee.

5. People who whinge on forums - oh wait

unclebuck

You need to ask You must live in a cave on some distant planet....

jackies

1.People who do not indicate when driving
2.People who do not thank you when you let them past when driving
3.Queue jumpers
4.All Chavs
5.People who let their car door hit yours in the supermarket etc.

Holy Ghost

1. brussels sprouts
2. hugh edwards
3. louis walsh
4. warnings on packets of peanuts that say "this product may contain nuts."
5. commercial architects

Jerome

1. Onions (as in raw onions used on any food)
2. Wasps
3. Nasal hair
4. North American recruitment practices
5. Bad managers (who cause me to deal with #4)

AndyC_772

iTrader: (2)

1. Indian call centres
2. "Speed kills"
3. Wasps, ants and the like
4. Political correctness
5. Subscription channels that also have adverts. It's one or the other, guys, make your minds up!

paulr

1.
Teeth.We should all be altered genetically so we grow new teeth every 5 years.Any mistakes at the dentist,just wait a few years and you grow a new one.

2.
Male pattern baldness

3.
Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson

4.
The notion that TV is educational.

5.
Gangsta rap.