davyboy

...is there another reason he'd not allow it? I am sure she's be willing to put father "unknown" on the birth certificate, and not involve the CSA.

Maybe he just hates her, and thinks she'd make a bad parent

I can't help feel for the girl, her only chance of having "her" child.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4779876.stm

Dave

Jonathan Davies

I don't think it's up to her whether the CSA get involved. Your child > you pay. He seems fairly un-jubilant about the result - just didn't want to have a child.

davegtt

Tell her to get knotted IMO.

davyboy

Incorrect.

STi wanna Subaru

iTrader: (1)

Fair play to him I say. His choice as much as hers IMHO. I wonder what she would do if the role was reversed somewhat.

davyboy

....blimey, you lot are all heart.

The Zohan

Why must he hate her to not want to have a child with her - not sure hate is his motivation really?

The Sperm in question was donated when they where together in a relationship.

They are now not together.

Ity appears that the father takes his responsibiliy seriously and is jointly responsible for any child - not just financially but morally as well.

How would i feel if an ex said the same to me - the same as this chap, i wonder if you would really want to have a child with another woman once you had split and how would your new partner feel?

The woman still has options she can have donated egg implanted.

For once i think the courts got it right.

davyboy

..........yeah but it wont be her child.

Plenty of men donate sperm, why can't this chap do the same thing...well sort of.

Lee247

Really, really difficult one this. It's her eggs and his sperm, so who is the rightful owner!!!

The Zohan

'Won't be her child,' maybe not the egg but she will carry it and give birth to it and then bring it up - if that is not her child then what is?

STi wanna Subaru

iTrader: (1)

Because he knows that his child will be out there and no matter what he will have an emotional attachement. I'd be the same as him. It's tough on her but that's life sometimes.

davyboy

One that looks like her

OllyK

Another thumbs up to the courts making the right decision. The embryo is as much part of him as part of her and it's quite right it should be a joint decision. The fact that unlike all the chavs out there this guy takes his duty as a parent seriously is to be applauded IMO. If having a child is that important to her, she can adopt or look for egg donations from another source. Indeed if she had thought on she could have had eggs frozen BEFORE the treatment.

The Zohan

Thats exactly the point!

STi wanna Subaru

iTrader: (1)

They both went into it giving consent but they have the right to withdraw that consent. They both will have been aware of that. He has exercised his right. Who's to say they haven't split because she is devil woman and there is no way on earth he would want her to raise his child.

OllyK

Not all kids look like their parents. And why can't she do what other infertile parents do and adopt?

davyboy

When science is this powerful - laws need to be rewritten.

This is what happened with that other bird.......the one who could finally use her dead husbands sperm.

But you're right, the next person to do this can learn from mistakes and get eggs frozen rather than an embryo.

Jonathan Davies

Are you sure? Even if you apply for benefits?

I'm not an expert or anything... maybe I'm remembering wrongly, or remembering proposals instead of current practice.

Anyway - surely it has to be a joint decision in moral terms alone.

STi wanna Subaru

iTrader: (1)

I think that one is very much a different situation.

davyboy

...............yeah he couldn't say no!

STi wanna Subaru

iTrader: (1)

I meant if you where looking at the legal implications of geting the law changed.

SCOsazOBY

they should let her have them because theres the high risk that they wont even fertilise.

The Zohan

WHY?

David Lock

Well I think he's a ****.......

jfrf

i think its pretty selfish wanting to bring up a child alone.

anyhow whats the big deal about insisting the child being genetically related.
just adopt if you like children that much.

Clarebabes

Am I rightly thinking that most of the negative comments on here have been made by men? If I am, then as a woman myself who has been through childbirth, I can understand why she has gone this far to have "her" embryos saved and possibly implanted in the future.

A woman can say that the father is unknown and she doesn't HAVE to involve the CSA if she doesn't want to. I have no idea if it affects benefits, but to be honest, if she can afford to take him to the ECHR, then she can't be short of a bob or two - or perhaps she is now. If she says she doesn't know who the father is, how can they pursue him?

Only a woman can truly understand the need to have children, and that if that is impossible to fulfil, then she will go to the ends of the earth to explore any avenue available which is what she has done.

I feel sorry for her. OK, she can use donor sperm/eggs, but it won't be the same. As for adoption, that is not a substitute for having your own child, from donor embryos or your own genetic material. I can feel grateful that I've got a child and can have more. I would be devastated if I found out I couldn't have any more, especially if I did have possible babies stored and they were going to be destroyed....

Lee247

I agree, but one flaw in your comment, it would be their child not his.
As I said, extremely difficult one. Glad I was not the judge. The other side of the coin is, he can still have his children, she cannot have her own.

jfrf

there is no need to have children

and i cant see why it should differ from men/women.
the only difference is that women are more irrational and emotional than men.

being a parent is about bringing a child up and looking after it.
so its should not be that important if its not her genetic material.

SCOsazOBY

because as a woman myself i agree that this woman should be given the opportunity to have what was hers in the first place put back in.

A woman can get pregnant and keep the child regardless of what the dad wants. This man has already given his consent and sperm (ok without the sex involved) but thats it as far as the man is concerned and from now on its upto the woman.

Plus theres the risk that the embryos might not fertilize anyway so why not let her have her chance.

Clarebabes

It's nothing to do with being irrational and emotional. It's genetic. We are biologically programmed to have children, it's nature.

It's why your girlfriend, if you have one, will be more "up for it" around days 12-16 of her cycle. Peak of fertility and coincides with ovulation.