Terzo 333

To cut a long story short, my stag do is in a couple of weeks. I've paid everything up front for flights and accomodation for 20 people, who have all but one re - imburrsed me to the tune of £260.

The one who hasn't said he DEFINATELY wanted to go in January. Since then I haven't heard from him, but have heard down the grapevine he has been off work sick (his brother is a best mate)

I have sent several text messages, and have rung him countless times asking him to let me know if he is still going or not. I have been very sympathetic, saying if you are skint, pay me over the course of a few months, but still heard nothing.

I know he isn't skint as he has been going to the pub most nights

I also heard on the grapevine this morning that he has no plans to go

It has wound me up to the point where I'm going to get my solicitor to write a letter to him, but thought I'd ask S'net's opinions first...

StickyMicky

always have people pay upfront

lesson to be learned!!!

powerman1

wouldn't go down the solicitor route could still prove unfruitful and a load of hassle to boot..speak to the guy direct in the pub and if he wont give you it then its a lesson learnt albeit expensive

Fuzz

Forget the "grapevine" for a start.
What comes down that sometimes is so far from the truth you wonder how it all got started.

Get round his house, find out what the real story is and then work it from there.

No one I know sends a solicitors letter to a mate !!


Andy

Curse of the Rushing Gimp

Sending a formal letter to a mate is a NO NO. someone like Lez would probably do it but they're just puppets of blair's pc world.

Alas

Get someone else lined up to go then tell the guy you had to give away his place as no cash had appeared and you had to finalise it.
He'll probably grab the chance for a way out.

And as said before - get the dosh first

SwissTony

iTrader: (19)

never never ever go down the solicitors route..this is a mate for starters and as such, a mate should be able to talk and reason to.

solicitors are reserved for bloody neighbours and ex-wifes, not mates.

track him down at the pub, have a quiet word in his shell like and get it sorted...if anything we have saved you the cost of a stamp

AudiLover

solicitors

Imagine that he would think it was a wind up!!!!

Stephb1986

i think you should have a quiet word with him down the pub so you get the truth out of him and if he says he's not coming invite someone else

mpr

the same happened to me for a stag do and I'm still owed over 200 squid nearly 2 years later.... I'll probably get it back one day, but it'll be worth half what it was by the time inflation has took it's toll. As someone rightly pointed out - money up front or **** off and sort it out for yourself will be my response in future!

KiwiGTI

Funny how everyone is saying "but he's a mate" etc but he's not much of a mate if he's mucking you around for £260

PaulC72

I wouldn't bother with the solicitor all you will do is compound the amount of loss you could potentially wnd up with as currently it is only £260 if you add a solicitor letter to that £50 it starts getting silly, ?i would as other have said pop round to his house ask him direct if he says he can't pay try to resolve the issuse, if he refuses well don't consider him a friend any more and accept a £260 lesson, if you can get someone to fill the slot you may minimise your damage to the £40 transfer fee etc.

Good luck

Vegescoob

Mates can be talked to.
If you feel you can't talk to him, well?
Go round his and ask, you coming, if so money please.
If he is negative, find someone else who will pay.

Clarebabes

Make sure you take lots of pics and post them on here so we can laugh at your dodgy mates

Seamaster

Mates and money..... normaly a receipe for a disaster.

I HAD a friend once who was skint. I lent him my Celica for five months. When I got it back (I paid the excess for him but this never got paid to me !)

He insisted I paid for a new tyre that he had fitted 2 weeks after he borrowed the car and decided to park on a load of glass. The guy was insisting that I should pay. The car was filthy and *** burns on the seats . Not even changed oil etc.

That " Mate" wont come near me now !

Terzo 333

Thanks for the replies

I use the word "mate" in a very loose way, he's more of an aquaintance. Believe me if he was a good mate I wouldn't be thinking of solicitors. If he thinks he can do me over for £260 I will quite happily spend £2 on a solicitors 7 day letter.

But also as someone has mentioned, pub talk can get out of hand and turn into bullsh1t. If he hasn't called tomorrow I'll try and catch up with him on Sunday - I'll let you know how it pans out.

I'm just wondering, if he says he isn't coming and he won't pay me, I'll probably end up knocking him out

scubbay

iTrader: (61)

KICK HIM IN THE CRIGS I SAY

Seamaster

"crigs" ???????

scubbay

iTrader: (61)

Crigs = Nuts now you know some norn irish slang

Apparition

Go without him, enjoy yourself, forget him and DON'T invite him to the wedding !
Yve

Dracoro

Yup, go on your stag do, offer this 'mate's' ticket to someone else (say for half price or sommat), take him off your wedding & stag list. Then forget about it, you're on your stag do, you don't want to be concerning yourself with someone who clearly isn't a mate (btw - if he's only an 'aquaintance' why invite him in the 1st place? stag do's are or mates, not 'aquaintances')

don't stress yourself over it.

SPEN555

When it comes to money do not trust ANYONE (even family) it is only fair for you to ask it up front, you cannot be expected to shell out all up front.

I would try and get someone else on the do who will pay up straight away and when the guy comes back to you; you tell him it is first come first served and you have gone well out of your way to advise him of that.

fatherpierre

If he's ignoring you then he's a **** who doesn't deserve an invite to your stag night/wedding.

A solicitor will do nothing other than take your cash. You have no legal standing to claim anything.

Forget him and save it in the memory bank for later.

Oh, and enjoy - make sure you use a johnny when sampling

Janspeed

iTrader: (1)

Break his legs, works here!

Brit_in_Japan

Tell him that if he doesn't pay up then you will ask everyone else on the trip if they wouldn't mind coughing up to cover the shortfall he's left you with (just over a tenner each). Assuming others on the trip are also his friends/acquaintances, that's a lot of peer pressure that he'll feel.

sl1cksterjam

I like that one Brit, good thinking and doesn't seem unreasonable

pslewis

Get someone else to go in his place ..... even offer it at Half-Price if time is getting short!!

Forget it, forget him, enjoy yourself, and learn a lesson - ALWAYS get money up-front!! Everyone says, "Yeah - good idea!!" to all things ..... the money does the talking - not the bravado!!

scoobydooooo

why don't you ask his brother to pay up , he can sort it out then ! if not you seem to have some funny mates and so called best mates

Butty

iTrader: (2)

Stag dos are for fun and frolicks with pals you can have a laugh with.
Having someone tag along that is half hearted about the event will spoil it.

Give up his place to someone more interested in celebrating your forthcoming nuptials.


Then grass him up to his employees aboout how he manages to crawl down to a pub every night yet can't get into work due to "sickness".