alcazar

iTrader: (2)

Just got back from ENT, they stuck a little fibre-optic with a light and a camera on the end right up my nose and down my throat from the back.

It's not painful, but feels weird. Now my nose won't stop running...I must check to see if my feet smell, because if they do, I'm upside down.

Seriously though, apparently I have an infection in my sinuses and need to take some humungous bright yellow pills twice daily. Clarythromycin?? They look like something you'd give to a horse, I can barely swallow them.

Now...which part of my body will stop working properly next...? So far it's been eyes, neck, hiatus hernia, spine, one arm, now my nose!

Isn't getting old fun?

matchmaker

I am waiting for a call to go for a check on my prostate. Camera is apparently inserted for this as well - but not up the nose

ditchmyster

iTrader: (7)

I'd be more concerned about the size of it if I were you.

Ps jeff, if you were a horse you'd be Evostic by now.

tony de wonderful

I don't think I could tolerate that except with serious sedation. I've had a swab done before and it made me feel dizzy and about to faint. We're just not designed to have stuff shoved up there.

zip106

I've had allsorts stuffed in my ear since Friday at ENT.

Had a ossiculoplasty carried out on Friday, I've now got an infection in my ear, and last night at the hospital they decided they wanted to take a swab of my ear canal.

Cue a bloody massive cotton bud shoved right into my ear....cue lots of bleeding when they dislodged the new scab where they cut some cartilage out for an ear drum graft....

Now on 500mg tabs of penicillin, 4 times a day, for a week.
Playing havoc with the old gut!

alcazar

iTrader: (2)

I thought it went up analy?

zip106

It'll be the same one you had up your honk

tony de wonderful

I think the anus is only useful as a place to 'feel' the texture and size of the prostate.

andylinney

Had a full colonoscopy a few years ago. Trust me, the day before is the worst part as you have to totally empty your intestines out so they can get a clear view. The laxatives are like rocket fuel and it gets to the point where you're just passing clear fluid. You have to drink three or four times as much as you normally would during the day and you basically wash yourself out. They're such powerful laxatives that you're instructed never to be more than a few seconds away from the toilet and my god they weren't kidding.

The actual procedure isn't that bad, you're off your face on sedatives and very well looked after by the team doing it. The funny bit is that they use air to inflate the areas they're looking at and it's down to you to get rid of it all. Cue days of the best farts you're ever going to do.

tony de wonderful

I once had a dodgy home brewed beer in Libya which may as well have been a super lax.

97TURBO

I had this done about year ago, the bloke never explained what was going to happen, he sprayed anasthetic on the back of my throat then sent me to the waiting room while it took effect...well that was horrific, the sensation that my nose and throat were closing in on themselves!!!! That was worse than the procedure itself.

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

My experience was very different to that.

I had a camera up my nose a few years back and I swear I thought I was going to suffocate as I swallowed all the anaesthetic that they sprayed up beforehand.

andylinney

Sadly Lisa they didn't stick the camera up my nose, they put it up my ****...

I would have preferred the nose option any day of the week.

tony de wonderful

I bet he even didn't put a ring on your finger.

andylinney

Nah, they even made me take my wedding ring off so they could take me into theatre straight away if they found anything (thankfully I was clear enough not to need any more surgery).

yabbadoo4

iTrader: (8)

ive had both of these procedures and believe me the camera down the back of the throat is a breeze compared to the one that goes in from below! the procedure was as follows: 2 giggling young nurses come through with a metal tray covered with a towel, swish the curtains around me and ask me the pull up my gown and pull the towel away to reveal a big shiny metal clamp and a syringe! next they squirt some bloody freezing cold gel right in the end of the old fella then apply this metal clamp and leave you for 15 mins for the numbing gel to take effect. so your sitting there with your poor ***** going numb, looking like the man in the iron mask, then the 2 nurses come back and wheeled me through to the theatre casually asking along the way would i mind if there was some obvservers as its student day! gingerly i said ok as we were wheeled through the doors into the theatre to be greeted by around 10 medical students, 3 surgeons and another 2 nurses!! so they gather around me in a big circle, the surgeon introduces himself and says, "how are we feeling today?" !! erm..... a bit nervous! "just try and relax" he says! so they take off the metal clamp and i can hear another table being wheeled over but i cant really see it as im flat on my back. so the surgeon picks up the camera attachment and f**k me its like a washing machine hose!! im expecting some thin fibre optic job but hell no this thing looks like a radiator hose! then the best line of them all "just try and relax and it will go in easier!" how wrong he was on that one. "it might feel a bit weird" no s**T sherlock! i look up at the 10 or so students around me and i can see all the male ones hiding behind there hands like " oh god damn" and knowing they were glad it was me and not them! not a pleasant procedure at all believe me. on the upside they found nothing at all and the surgeon said at least now you can rest easy knowing there is no cancer of any kind at all as most guys wont volunteer for the procedure. well i cant say i blame them! if any of you are having this procedure done all i can say is be brave! also just to say even the most "gifted" of guys will see their ***** retract into their body in a way that would make a sumo proud!

tony de wonderful

No pain before or after?

yabbadoo4

iTrader: (8)

yeah there was but it was my pride, dignity, and ego lol they were all bruised lol

RobsyUK

iTrader: (2)

Ive had this. Was cool to see my noise hairs looking super fat and then down my throat. It was so horrible as it was sliding out. I wanted to sneeze cough itch and pull away at the same time. Horrible feeling.

Yabbo my dad has had something up his jap eye twice to distroy a kidney stone . Both times they push it back into the kidney and have to abort. Im not sure whats left for him now after the sound waves and tsblets both failed to break it up...

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

I should have been more specific/separated my comments better.

The second obviously was about my nose. The first (the reason I quoted you) was talking about the same procedure you had. And my experience was not good.

Edit to add, despite being an unpleasant experience to say the least, I think I still would rank that lower in terms of 'not nice' than getting the camera down my throat. Neither were by far my worst experience, but camera down was way worse than camera up imo.

^OPM^

At least they gave you 15 mins for the anaesthetic to kick in, when I had a camera/grab thingy rammed up my japs eye to get a stent from out of my kidney, he squirted some gel up my todger and then straight away rammed his pipe up there before it had time to work, didn't half take my breath away.

What was the clamp for though, or was it just being kinky?

yabbadoo4

iTrader: (8)

The clamp was to stop the gel seeping out before it has time to work. Or so they told me. Maybe thsts why the nurses were giggling.

alcazar

iTrader: (2)

Not had that done, (the ***** thing...yet ), but have had a sigmoidoscope up my @rse TWICE. And yes, they gave me the laxatives, and yes, they bl00dy DO work fast.

I also had a barium enema, and actually got to do white poo for the next day!!! It was always my wish as a kid ( )

This latest one: no anaesthetic.

And now the ant-biotics are giving me an AWFUL taste in my mouth all the time, and stomach and kidney pain too.

mrmadcap

How much do these procedures cost?
Do they wear a gimp mask while they are doing it?
Are you allowed to wear a gimp mask while they are doing it?
If you like it and want it done again will they do you a cut price offer?
Will they film the procedure so you can put it on youtube?

warrenm2

I misread the title as Cameron up your nose! I know, I thought, he gets on my **** too

alcazar

iTrader: (2)

Free if you are a British citizen or a foreign dole scrounger.
No.
No.
No.
No.

Any more questions?

yabbadoo4

iTrader: (8)

if you have it done and like it and want it done again then you probably already own a gimp mask.

mrmadcap

Yes, can I see the pictures?

Chip

I have twice had to have a procedure called cystolitholapaxy to remove bladder stones, one of which was 14mm diameter. Had a cam up the old chap a few times before this as well. Op involves quite a bit of gear up the chap at once including camera, saline solution, forceps to hold the stone and another implement to crush and remove it. Obviously the op is pain free as it's done under a general but afterwards I was pissing all sorts of stuff, gravel, blood clots etc as well as feeling like I was pissing out hedgehogs every time I went for a pee. Not nice

andylinney

Gravel