OK, guys, reading some of the threads on here, we all need to lighten up a bit. Pete Lewis has done his best to wind us all up, so maybe it's time we had some fun ourselves at the expense of all those chavs.

A bit of history to start with...

Last summer I took my fiancée down to Cornwall for a weekend - to see the Eden Project (well worth a visit, BTW). We stayed in a nice B&B on the outskirts of Newquay. On the Saturday evening we walked into town to get dinner, and discovered that Newquay was Cornwall Chav Central - they were all out cruising (but not speeding) in their cars, with the violet neons underneath, the blue washer jets, and the go-faster stripes.

We got to thinking what we could do to wind them up. One option was to cruise the Scooby - a silver MY03STi PPP with nice silver PFF7s. Much better than any of their Novas/Fiestas/Clios/Chavaliers and, of course, no chav options fitted.

We mulled it over during dinner, and came up with a plan. The Chavavan!

You see, my Scooby has a detachable tow hitch for pulling the plane - so why not get a knackered old caravan and chav THAT up instead of the car? Then we could tow it around during chav cruises and take the ****

Ideas so far:

1) Under-chavavan neons
2) Duck Tape go-faster stripes - with a nice zig-zag, of course
3) A nodding Scooby Do in the back window
4) A stereo system out of a scrapyard ice-cream van (with that tune we all remember from our childhoods)
5) Blue washer jets on the front
6) Spinning hub caps (how could we not?)
7) Orange and brown flower-power curtains on sagging curtain wires - with frilly lace curtains, too
8) A mock-Burberry paint scheme
9) Fairy lights around the roof line

More ideas sought, my friends - over to you!

 

Needs at least 2 sets of fake exhausts....

 

Good plan. I envisage very large bore pipes coming through the bodywork either side at about waist level. With LEDs around them

Keep 'em coming!

 

Brilliant mate

 

dont forget side skirts and airbus sized wing on roof

 

See, I'm just an amateur in this game! Anyone got an outrageous wing they no longer want?

 

delorean styley swing up door ?


and a scoop .... definately needs a scoop. Bigger the better.

 

life size picture cutout of chavster kid giving people the finger out of the back window

( obviously you dont want a real chavster near your chavavan because he will nick anything he can lay his hands on )

 

HUGE spoiler (corsa one not a scooby one)

 

Need to have ''Bad boy'' and '' fast & furious'' written on it somewhere

 

Sorry it has to be max power (and if you can get some of them birds down to the opening give me a shout )

 

How about the performance parts 'shopping list' down the side, but instead of the usual names have things like Asda, Iceland, DHSS, Matalan etc.?

 

You're going to need stickers. *** adverts are the best.

 

ROFLMAO at this thread.

 

Top ideas, my friends - keep 'em coming :-) Maybe we should have a Scoobynet cruise for its first outing?

 

need to lower it! lower than my nans ****! so low that you can't actually go anywhere in it!

 

FPMSL how abour slamming it to the floor, or better yet put some hydraulics on it so it can bounce down the road to the bass from the huge wall of ICE you will need in the back window....

 

How about adjustable suspension - so it can be towed to the cruise on 'high' then lowered until the tyres are rubbing on the arches (or strategically placed "rubbing pads" that make a dreadful squeal)?

We need to think about the interior, too. How about getting some old mannequins and dressing them as chavs drinking Fosters, XXXX, etc.? Supply of old Burberry clothing and gold chains required!

 

You need one of them halfords window stickers "MISSION ABORTED GONE FOR A SPLIFF" for the rear window

 

Lower it
delock the door
tinted windows
neons
front spoiler/splitter and rear apron
ear shattering sound system (wiv BIG BASS innit )
Rather large and tasteless spoiler
badboy bonnet (!?)
lexus lights or blacked out lights.
Some techno-bollox front window top-tint ("Powered by Calor"?)
List of 'tuned parts' down the door
Almost insulting reparte on the rear window or rear bodywork.
Paint it gloss black


J.

 

Cardboardfibre bodykit!

 

This sounds like a great Friday afternoon task for a Photoshop expert

Best one wins ... errrrrmmmmmm, wins that's it

Avalyn.

 

Better still, best one gets made and displayed! Come on you Photoshoppers, let's see what you can do!

 

Pimped out purple velvet interior?

 

is it twin axle or a single?? because if its a single we could split the cost of some 20" alloys 2 each

 

just a quick thought how many people on here have the following lol


Lower it
delock the door
tinted windows
neons
front spoiler/splitter and rear apron
ear shattering sound system (wiv BIG BASS innit )
Rather large and tasteless spoiler
badboy bonnet (!?)
lexus lights or blacked out lights.
Some techno-bollox front window top-tint ("Powered by Calor"?)
List of 'tuned parts' down the door
Almost insulting reparte on the rear window or rear bodywork.
Paint it gloss black


only just see nthe list lmao

 

It'll be whatever's available from the caravan graveyard, mate!

 

This thread would be waaaay better with someone utilising their immense Photoshop skills

Joolz

 

If you're looking for the chav with the finger up for the back there's plenty to choose from here:- http://www.glasgowsurvival.co.uk/gallery/gallery1.html

Page 10 is best...


Also must have 'On a mission' painted somewhere on the chavavan...

 

Dumpvalve - its got to have a VTA dumpvalve.......