Mr Bat

I have a completely standard Blobeye STI and was in the process of buying petrol when the 'assistant' said to me....

'What did that look like before you decided to pimp it up to the max?' ....to which i wanted to reply but didn't...."What did you look like before you were fat"

'Er, I bought it new like that'

'Oh, so what is it, a Ford?'............no !

'A suba what'?

Not sure that's the best way to talk to customers....****

satancom

Oh dear.. Had a MG ZS diesel as a fleet car before (it was the fastest thing on my list ok). First tank load i put in it guy behind the counter said i should call the aa cos i just put diesel in my petrol car.

No matter what I said he would not believe that my MG had a diesel engine.. Plum

BigAl024

They aint working on the minimum wage in a petrol station forecourt by accident!

Shark Man

You should try explaining to a curious attendant that the big red thing with spouty spoilers and nostrils on the forecout which I just dumped £60 of petrol in is a Vauxhall. Then repeat the word Mon-a-ro three times (third time slowely).

Then the conversation progresses a bit like this:

I get asked how big the engine is.

6 litres.

what?

6 litres

F**k me, Dat a v6 or somethin?

Nope its a v8.

Bets dat uses some petrol

'bout 20mpg

<blank expression>

An dat's a Vauxhall, right?

Yes its a (f**kin) Vauxhall


It was cool at first, now its starting to get annoying.

pippyrips

kgt

iTrader: (1)

One young lady at the place round the corner from me asked,

"if the hole in the bonnet gets filled with water, wont the engine go out" ??!?!?!?

I said it hadnt happened yet, but I'd watch out for it.......

And she looked at me as if I was the stupid one.

vtec_addict1

Quality thread

chocolate_o_brian

iTrader: (22)

i must be lucky then. the lady attendant/cashier at my local shell station...

• always seems to asking how her ***** look in her red t-shirt (theyre huge by the way)
• loves talking about subarus, reminding me only v-power will do
• discusses the weekend footy scores as an avid man utd fan (like me)

needless to say the others in the growing que get wound up by our chit-chatting

oh shes around 40-45, im 23. milf

postie90

thats funny.......

help2003

iTrader: (1)

Pic's next time your there please

Ghetto Dude3

somebody called mine an evo

Janspeed

iTrader: (1)

Some have asked what the big hole in the bonnet is for......I said it was for the jet engine!

Blank expressions......."just kidding it's the air intake for the intercooler...." more blank expressions......

Oh well....

Janspeed

iTrader: (1)

But those comments are............well minimum wage ones....

vtec_addict1

She sounded good until you mnentioned she was a Man U fan
As mentioned, this thread is useless without pics

20withascooby

i got the best one buy a group of boys in a renualt clio they came upto me in a tesco garage and asked wat litre it was
i said 2.0 turbo

fat mate bet that flies they for a diesel. they said


i just pretended i didnt hear it how stupid can u get when im stading there with a bloody super unleaded pump in ma hand

stineal

while talking about stupid people why do lads in the likes of 1.2 corsa sports and saxo vts`s feel the need while i am stood filling my car up at the station or washing it on my front to drive past staring and reving there peco big bore in my ear is it some kind of statement?

20withascooby

hey ive gt a corsa with a peco exhaust on it lol

myblackwrx

iTrader: (1)

I've had the 'Is it a diesel' and 'You're car has got a misfire' lines .

bootsy

get a older woman with a nice rack (man u fan as well bonus)

leerichosti

my mates mam had a forrester and took it back because of "the blown exhaust"

NAY93WRX

iTrader: (3)

After filling up at my local Shell garage and starting the engine, a bloke came up to my window and said "Nice car mate....u wanna get that idle sorted though, sound like its misfiring"

I was going to explain the whole un-equal length manifold thing but
I just looked at him for a few seconds, shook my head and drove away misfiring all the way............

R12many

My 'bundle of fun' garage attendant greeted me one early morning with "£30 of diesel sir?". My heart sank into my shoes at the thought of my stupid mistake, until she started laughing. Oh what fun it must be to try and make people think they've filled up with the wrong fuel!

mag6/4 2

thanks guy for slating those that work in petrol stations like me no not all of us get the minimum wage if i got that i wont get out of bed

Bubba po

You are aware of the concept known as humour, and its not-entirely-serious nature, aren't you?

Janspeed

iTrader: (1)

Ppl dont need minimum wage to say stupid things! The richer, the dumber in many cases!

Suresh

evil.soup

iTrader: (1)

First ever Scooby meet i went to was a joint Wales and Midlands one. The car park was packed to the gills with Imprezas, 30 plus at least, so as you can imagine it attracted some interest.

Hanging around minding my own business and some plank in a 1.1 Saxo with a Peco exhaust comes reving into the car park, onto the gravel area, wheelspins and revs around some of the cars and drives off dipping the clutch and reving as he goes WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

finalzero

Haha,

Nothing wrong with working in a petrol station, I did that a while back in between jobs, paid the bills.

But you do get the typical characters in there, usually young people earning a few extra squids, got one guy at my local tesco petrol station who always has something to say about cars.. rough outline of the conversation that entails when I go to pay for fuel:

"so you ad anfink new dun to it?"

"erm.. no, its still the same as it was when it left the factory.."

"yeah well my mate's mate's mate's girlfriends sisters mate's brothers mum has got a boyfriend who has got a mate who has got another mate that is well into his cars init man!!!! yeah its weeekid and he's got like this ***** RS Turdbo with cossie pistons, rocket engine, nitro injection and it only needs one wheel coz its so ******* fast man its mentaaaaaal!!!! yeah init!!!! the fasteds cozzie around yeah its well weeekid!!!"

"I thought you said it was an RS Turbo?"

"Yeah he has got a cozzie as well man I bet it would raise your car right up coz its well fast init?"

Probably his 1.1 fiesta in the car park with the Halfords Christmas specials on it.

Norman Dog

iTrader: (1)

I used to work as a petrol pump attendant way back in 1985 when I was 17 and petrol was sold in gallons

The amount of fiddle you could make with company car / van drivers was nearly better than the wages

Alan MaC

Pulled into the Tesco's in Boston this week.

Punter @ the next pump said, I can give you the number of a good Mechanic to sort out that misfiring engine, it sounds loud & i'd have it looked at if I were you.

I explained that is how a full 3" Exhaust system sounds.

He then said, can give you the number of a good little independent Exhaust Place to sort out your Exhaust then.

Thanks I said, I'll just have to live with it!

At least he was trying to be helpful.

Regards

Alan MaC